Re: Juan Pablo & Nikki Ferrell General Discussion - Fan Forum

by stuckinsc Wed Mar 12, 2014 7:59 pm

soccermom333 wrote:
Alanna wrote:These do remind me of Jed a little bit so I can see the similarities. In both of these, the women way more invested than the men and the mind boggled why the women didn't wake up and see this. The difference is that Ed thought it was all a big joke and JPG had legitimately gotten all upset and riled up by his portrayal. Anyway, I too wish them the best. I like Nikki and they looked like a team at ATFR so maybe there is something very real and united in their relationship. Idk!

At least Ed said he loved Jillian and that she seemed perfect for him because he never felt that way before. He proposed, and she moved to Chicago. Ed and Jillian were both very respectful at the ATFR. They answered all questions. Yes, I am sure a lot of people were wondering what she was thinking, but not until the tabloids came out with ex-girfriend gate a couple weeks later.

It will be interesting to see where Nikki and Juan Pablo end up living. Will she move for him etc.

Ed did say he loved Jillian, and then continued to act disrespectfully to her basically their whole relationship. JPG refused to say ILY on the AFTR, but then posted a very sweet song of love to Nikki the next day. I don't know if they will last or not, but I think it is great they want to give it a try.

For me, I would rather have a man be honest and show me that he cares for me then spouted fake words of love but treat me without love or respect.

I remember telling on of my best friends when she was going through a hard relationship to look at the guys actions. He would claim to love her, but he wouldn't show up, or he constantly flirted with other women in front of her. He made her feel like his last priority and her response was always, but he says he loves me.

Much like Mommyof1 said, her husband showed her but couldn't always say it. For me my personal choice would be to have the man show it rather than say it all the time. I also think JPG does say it. I think he and Nikki had decided to not give TPTB even one more thing. I can actually see him waiting on purpose and as soon as they left the building the AFTR was taped in kissing her and telling her that he loved her. Do I know that is what happened? Nope, but I can see him doing something like that.

Also, for all the people claiming that Nikki is being duped or has rose colored glasses on or whatever. She is one of the strongest females we have ever seen on this show, she was confident enough to follow a career she loves and not just flitter around as a model. She does that on the side, but decided for for her she wanted to be a pediatric nurse and went for it. She seems quite comfortable with herself and I compare the view of Nikki with Clare. We see pics of Nikki au natural, did we ever see any pics of Clare ever not sporting a ton of makeup and looking polished? I think Nikki knows herself and what she wants. I think for now that is JPG and to see where it goes, when and if she is unhappy I expect her to end it. Her family was by far one of the most level headed we have ever seen on this show, if they felt he wasn't treating her right do you think they would support this relationship.

Finally, haven't all of us had at least one relationship where no one else got it but us? Sometimes everyone else is right and sometimes they aren't. My bff had to set limits on her now husband for everything. She had to give him a deadline to propose, she had to give a deadline to set a date for the wedding, she had to tell him that the clock was ticking and it was time to start the baby making. Each and every time, he was uncomfortable and resisted, then he thought about it, gave in and was thrilled each and every time with the outcome. He is not my favorite person, he is much less educated than she is and a bit of a pompous ass himself, I would never have chosen him for her. But, they have now been married for over five years and he has stood by her through many tough times with her family and she had very hard fertility issues and he loved her through that and they are going to have a sweet little girl soon and he can't wait. He has the nursery painted and after every shower, he comes home and washes the little clothes and puts them away and assembles anything that needs it right away. She is high risk, so for the first trimester he took care of everything and just let her do her teaching job and he took care of everything else. Would I chose him? Nope. Do I still want to smack him when he is rude to me and my friends? Yup. But he loves her and makes her happy and as she has told me allows her to lighten up and take herself less seriously, so therefore be much happier. So I support them together and am so glad that her happy ending worked out and that she stood tall against me, her sister and everyone else who just knew he wasn't the right one for her.

by stuckinsc Wed Mar 12, 2014 8:01 pm

Mommyof1 wrote:
Maggenzm wrote:
Mommyof1 wrote:^ When my DH and I were dating, he had a very difficult time expressing his emotions. At times, I wondered if he even liked me , but he kept asking me out. I remember one time I was leaving his apartment (we were in a long distance relationship) and as I was leaving, his eyes welled up with tears! It showed me that I did mean something to him. He was always the type to show me he loved me rather than tell me. He's not really a verbal person. On the day that he proposed to me, he made a scrapbook and filled it with photos and mementos of things we did while dating and gave me a dozen roses with the ring box tucked inside! I was floored at the time it must have taken to make that scrapbook! That being said, I wonder if JP is the same way. Easier to show love than actually say it.

The is a book called " the 5 love language of love" It's such a great read on relationship that I wanted to suggest to Nikki.

Yes! By Gary Chapman. I have read it. Actually, we both read it. Great book! 1) Words of Affirmation 2) Quality Time 3) Gifts 4) Acts of Service 5) Physical Touch

My love languages are Quality Time AND Physical Touch while my DH's love language is Words of Affirmation - he is BIG on being appreciated AND respected.

So funny mommy, you and your husband are the reverse of me and my husband. He is quality time and physical touch and I am words of affirmation and acts of service. We had to figure it out, because we both gave in the way each of us individually wanted at first and had to learn to communicate to the other in their way.

by lovelySC Wed Mar 12, 2014 8:48 pm

2observe wrote:
Mommyof1 wrote:^ When my DH and I were dating, he had a very difficult time expressing his emotions. At times, I wondered if he even liked me , but he kept asking me out. I remember one time I was leaving his apartment (we were in a long distance relationship) and as I was leaving, his eyes welled up with tears! It showed me that I did mean something to him. He was always the type to show me he loved me rather than tell me. He's not really a verbal person. On the day that he proposed to me, he made a scrapbook and filled it with photos and mementos of things we did while dating and gave me a dozen roses with the ring box tucked inside! I was floored at the time it must have taken to make that scrapbook! That being said, I wonder if JP is the same way. Easier to show love than actually say it.
That's been my thinking all along.

------------

JP's Camilla was conceived without marriage, I wonder if he ever loved her Mother. But I heard him say she is a very good Mom and kind.

by eliza3 Wed Mar 12, 2014 8:56 pm

lovelySC wrote:
2observe wrote:
Mommyof1 wrote:^ When my DH and I were dating, he had a very difficult time expressing his emotions. At times, I wondered if he even liked me , but he kept asking me out. I remember one time I was leaving his apartment (we were in a long distance relationship) and as I was leaving, his eyes welled up with tears! It showed me that I did mean something to him. He was always the type to show me he loved me rather than tell me. He's not really a verbal person. On the day that he proposed to me, he made a scrapbook and filled it with photos and mementos of things we did while dating and gave me a dozen roses with the ring box tucked inside! I was floored at the time it must have taken to make that scrapbook! That being said, I wonder if JP is the same way. Easier to show love than actually say it.
That's been my thinking all along.

------------

JP's Camilla was conceived without marriage, I wonder if he ever loved her Mother. But I heard him say she is a very good Mom and kind.

I think he loved Carla more than she loved him. During the show when his cousin was talking with both Nikki and Clare, he asked them (and I'm paraphrasing) what they would do if the relationship got hard - would they leave. I took that as meaning that Carla didn't want a relationship with JP when things got tough. I thought his cousin was looking out for him and trying to make sure that the next girl would fight for him and the relationship

by Alanna Wed Mar 12, 2014 8:58 pm

I'm not sure what happened with Carla but he also posted a love video for her on his YouTube page. Different song, thank goodness lol. I do like that Nikki and Carla look nothing alike, makes me more confident that he's not looking for Carla2 but rather likes Nikki for Nikki.

by stuckinsc Wed Mar 12, 2014 9:06 pm

Do we actually know how long JP and Carla were together before she got pregnant? It may have been they didn't really know each other very well and they tried to make it last for their child but it just wasn't. I like that he and Carla seem to have stayed friends, there was no bitter divorce and it genuinely seems like they want make things as good as they can for Camila. To me that speaks highly of JP. I also like that Nikki has met Carla. I actually think in someways it was important for JP to see that Nikki was going to be confident to handle being around Carla since she will always be a part of his life.

by julychild Wed Mar 12, 2014 9:15 pm

stuckinsc wrote:Do we actually know how long JP and Carla were together before she got pregnant? It may have been they didn't really know each other very well and they tried to make it last for their child but it just wasn't. I like that he and Carla seem to have stayed friends, there was no bitter divorce and it genuinely seems like they want make things as good as they can for Camila. To me that speaks highly of JP. I also like that Nikki has met Carla. I actually think in someways it was important for JP to see that Nikki was going to be confident to handle being around Carla since she will always be a part of his life.

According to JP (that interview should be in one of the 1st non-spoiler threads) Carla became pregnant about a month after they began dating and although they didn't know each other very well at that point, they still tried to make it work. They stayed together for another year after the baby was born. However, things didn't work out because Carla used to talk back and argue with him.

by dw_a_mom Wed Mar 12, 2014 9:22 pm

julychild wrote:
stuckinsc wrote:Do we actually know how long JP and Carla were together before she got pregnant? It may have been they didn't really know each other very well and they tried to make it last for their child but it just wasn't. I like that he and Carla seem to have stayed friends, there was no bitter divorce and it genuinely seems like they want make things as good as they can for Camila. To me that speaks highly of JP. I also like that Nikki has met Carla. I actually think in someways it was important for JP to see that Nikki was going to be confident to handle being around Carla since she will always be a part of his life.

According to JP (that interview should be in one of the 1st non-spoiler threads) Carla became pregnant about a month after they began dating and although they didn't know each other very well at that point, they still tried to make it work. They stayed together for another year after the baby was born. However, things didn't work out because Carla used to talk back and argue with him.

Ugh, that is what I don't like about his view on relationships. He won't let a woman stand up for herself and what she thinks or wants. He can never have a healthy relationship if he doesn't let go of that. But, at least its obvious, he isn't hiding that attitude.

by Alanna Wed Mar 12, 2014 9:22 pm

Thanks julychild, that's...comforting to hear. That he doesn't like when the woman talks back but not really a surprise. For all her wit and snark, Nikki seems perfectly content not to talk back judging by the frc and atfr so maybe this will be okay.

by richmondrose Wed Mar 12, 2014 9:27 pm

julychild wrote:
stuckinsc wrote:Do we actually know how long JP and Carla were together before she got pregnant? It may have been they didn't really know each other very well and they tried to make it last for their child but it just wasn't. I like that he and Carla seem to have stayed friends, there was no bitter divorce and it genuinely seems like they want make things as good as they can for Camila. To me that speaks highly of JP. I also like that Nikki has met Carla. I actually think in someways it was important for JP to see that Nikki was going to be confident to handle being around Carla since she will always be a part of his life.

According to JP (that interview should be in one of the 1st non-spoiler threads) Carla became pregnant about a month after they began dating and although they didn't know each other very well at that point, they still tried to make it work. They stayed together for another year after the baby was born. However, things didn't work out because Carla used to talk back and argue with him. His words.

Really? That doesn't sound like a good relationship at all. Good thing they split.

by Muslady Wed Mar 12, 2014 9:28 pm

lovelySC wrote:
2observe wrote:
Mommyof1 wrote:^ When my DH and I were dating, he had a very difficult time expressing his emotions. At times, I wondered if he even liked me , but he kept asking me out. I remember one time I was leaving his apartment (we were in a long distance relationship) and as I was leaving, his eyes welled up with tears! It showed me that I did mean something to him. He was always the type to show me he loved me rather than tell me. He's not really a verbal person. On the day that he proposed to me, he made a scrapbook and filled it with photos and mementos of things we did while dating and gave me a dozen roses with the ring box tucked inside! I was floored at the time it must have taken to make that scrapbook! That being said, I wonder if JP is the same way. Easier to show love than actually say it.
That's been my thinking all along.

------------

JP's Camilla was conceived without marriage, I wonder if he ever loved her Mother. But I heard him say she is a very good Mom and kind.

Over Thanksgiving our family went to Argentina to see our daughter who had been living there for 3 months. The first thing she said was leave your engagement ring home, they don't wear those here. You will look like a tourist and get taken and/or robbed. This was my first thought when JuanPa's sister tweeted about the earrings being more valuable than any engagement ring TPTB would have bought you. I'm pretty sure JuanPa put more value on the earrings and the song than the ring because of his culture. I have no idea if they will make it or not but I do think he cares more about her than we were shown on that show. I'm sure Nikki was nervous at the AFTR because JuanPa was. Those feelings are transferred, but that video was adorable!

by notarose Wed Mar 12, 2014 9:37 pm

dw_a_mom wrote:
julychild wrote:
stuckinsc wrote:Do we actually know how long JP and Carla were together before she got pregnant? It may have been they didn't really know each other very well and they tried to make it last for their child but it just wasn't. I like that he and Carla seem to have stayed friends, there was no bitter divorce and it genuinely seems like they want make things as good as they can for Camila. To me that speaks highly of JP. I also like that Nikki has met Carla. I actually think in someways it was important for JP to see that Nikki was going to be confident to handle being around Carla since she will always be a part of his life.

According to JP (that interview should be in one of the 1st non-spoiler threads) Carla became pregnant about a month after they began dating and although they didn't know each other very well at that point, they still tried to make it work. They stayed together for another year after the baby was born. However, things didn't work out because Carla used to talk back and argue with him.

Ugh, that is what I don't like about his view on relationships. He won't let a woman stand up for herself and what she thinks or wants. He can never have a healthy relationship if he doesn't let go of that. But, at least its obvious, he isn't hiding that attitude.

The good news: despite Andi's hard hitting arguing style (didn't she call him an a** to his face?), JP didn't walk away or yell or name call SO this type of arguing style is effective with him. He initiated a hug when she left and they did hug. Perhaps Carla has a different style, more of an interrupter/cryer type or that woman who believes a man should be able to read her mind.
Personally I was raised with Andi's style of arguing except we speak up as soon as possible. And, our family law is you have to stick with the issue and not degenerate into what happened last year or name calling. If we didn't we were sent to our room until we were prepared to be civil. Different strokes for different folks.

by Sponsored content