Re: Sean & Catherine - The Bachelor 17 - Thread #1

[ceebeedeedum]

Another article

Three Disturbing New Developments on ABC's "The Bachelor" and "The Bachelorette"
A case study in how to create an unsustainable relationship.
Published on June 9, 2012 by Dr. Shauna H. Springer

(excerpts)

The purpose of this article is to dispel any illusion that what is manufactured on The Bachelor is anything like “love,” by laying bare the show's manipulative elements. The cards are stacked so that almost anyone on the show would experience the feeling of falling in love.
I was disturbed to witness three additional manipulative elements in the script of the show.

1,.The first is the increased tendency for the host to plant foolish ideas that seem to be (more often than not) swallowed whole by the bachelor or bachelorette

One of the “stock” lines issued by host Chris Harrison in the very first show of the season, after the bachelor and bachelorette have just laid eyes on their respective pools of contestants, is “Do you think your future wife (or husband) is in that room?”

Essentially, the thrust of this statement is that after just clapping eyes on a set of attractive strangers, one ought to be mentally projecting toward a decision that will be legally and emotionally binding for the rest of one’s life (even when two people divorce, continuing legal and emotional ties often have a significant effect on both partners for the rest of their lives).

This emotionally manipulative statement, a form of psychological priming, is paired with an effort to convince the bachelor or bachelorette that the path to true love requires one to “trust one’s feelings.” eg: “Last time I was on the show, I held back from trusting my feelings. This time, I don’t want to have any regrets, because life is too short, so I’m going to put myself out there and trust what I feel no matter what.”

2. The second unfortunate new development in more recent seasons is the staging of narcissistic fantasies that quickly become subsumed into the “love story.” It’s as though the contestants have been selected by the Make-A-Wish Foundation for the fulfillment of whatever grandiose fantasies they may have, usually something on the theme of performing for thousands of people or having dinner in the middle of the Bellagio fountain, which “no one has ever done before.” (eg: fulfillment of bucket lists, trips, riding the chopper for a date)

3. The third disturbing new development is what I would call “the trauma pitch.” -- That is, there seems to be an unchecked expectation that contestants reveal their deepest traumas during their first one-on-one conversations with the bachelor or bachelorette. As a professional counselor, I find it very disturbing to watch contestants open up about alcoholic parents, brain hemorrhages, deaths of their beloved first spouses, and other traumas of similar depth to another person they have just met (and an anonymous viewing audience of 10 million people).

Due to limited and unpredictable access to the bachelor or bachelorette, there is intense pressure to “make a pitch”—that is, to form a sound bite about how one’s deepest trauma has taught them some valuable life lesson, usually some variant of one of these three or four themes…

“The experience of [insert horrible trauma that the bachelor/bachelorette and audience have no right to know] has taught me to….“never take life for granted/make the most out of every day/tell the people I care about that I love them more often/make the most out of the chances I’m given.”

On the basis of this trauma pitch, a person’s character is weighed and judged (by the bachelor/bachelorette and the huge, anonymous viewing audience). What a terrible model for the development of trust and appropriate timing of self-disclosures in an intimate relationship!


For the show’s producers, there is no apparent downside to all of the emotional suffering they are creating. After all, the shrapnel of a disastrous “love” collision from this season's show may become next season's star, in a “rebound” relationship scenario that endlessly repeats itself. Can there be anything more emotionally dangerous, and less romantic, than a show that predictably fails to result in sustainable love matches?

The only thing that actually appears real in the show is the emotional devastation and gut-wrenching pain of the heartbroken and emotionally-damaged contestants. Is it any surprise that Mike Fleiss, the real-life producer of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette also produced two re-makes of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre? Given the intense manipulation of contestants and the unpredictable emotional carnage that ensues, the show has elements of a horror flick.

This is not to say that true love does not exist. Love can and does work, but what is widely portrayed by the media is not love, but rather examples of unsustainable collisions. It’s easy for us to be fooled because we tend to believe the cultural lore (promoted so widely in the media) that explosively positive feelings are the mark of true love. In reality, such feelings suggest three possibilities, only one of which is true love (alternatively, you could end up heart-broken or trapped in the nightmare of an abusive relationship). Ultimately, The Bachelor (or The Bachelorette) is a case study of how to create an unsustainable relationship.

Source Psych Today

The articles are long but I got it from a friend's email who was inspired to write a psychological horror short novel based on the bachelor. Unfortunately he is not done with writing it yet.

Lol! Love this post notguilty! I just posted some of my thoughts on the DWTS thread. Ofcourse, I got the typical rose colored glass responses. I think your post is the best rebuttal!

[notguilty]

Just to clarify these articles were written way before Sean met Catherine but the manipulation techniques are still the same.

The doctor's say this about the relationships (from the above article)

You are exactly right - I went into this in much greater detail in the first chapter of my book. They are really dating "ABC" in a way since ABC provides this fantasy life that no one can sustain!

Or rather (now as we speak)Sean is still dating ABC and Catherine is supporting this relationship and in the interim trying
to seek opportunities for herself. The real relationship begins when the cameras are gone, they are budgeting their own money and they are making important logistical decisions about their life.

I will be very interested in a book written by the producers of this franchise. I want to know their manipulation games and a real insiders
take on this show.

[Guest]

Yes, it did make him look stupid to propose after supposedly deciding the night before, but it was that or looking like a jerk for leading Lindsay along. He should have let Lindsay go on the LCD, like Ali did with Chris. I am not 100% convinced that he wasn't undecided. The faith thing may have been a struggle for him to pick Cat and then she said something on the LCD that calmed his extreme anxiety over the whole thing. Who knows.
That's my take on it, also

Lordy... that was rough yesterday! I may not venture out of this place for awhile. :shocked!:

I was :hidingchair but you handled yourself extremely well! :Clap:


Sorry, I meant to quote Grace in the above but messed up!

Well.. thank you very much. I think I could have done better but after the racist and PM comments I also could have done a whole lot worse! :atomic: Thankfully UMNgirl stepped in with the picture of the kitty. :babies:

AGREE with instinct on the bold part! And kitty gifs always make me smile! Thanks unmgirl! And keep us posted when you apply for The Bach!

Thanks Cee and umngirl. The kitten made me smile too!

[Love_Me]

As long as everyone follows the rules feel free to talk about anything you want to. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I can always make a No Discussion thread where News/Updates about just The Bachelor 17 can be posted.

Just let me know.

Maybe we can have some Off Topic threads for Favorite Novels/Movies? Thanks!

Here are the Novels & Movies threads that were created a while ago:

All about Books ~ Discussion Welcome

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Movie Mania ~ Discussion

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Let me know if you want a new combined thread created and I will be happy to make it. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

[Kashathediva]

As long as everyone follows the rules feel free to talk about anything you want to. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I can always make a No Discussion thread where News/Updates about just The Bachelor 17 can be posted.

Just let me know.

Maybe we can have some Off Topic threads for Favorite Novels/Movies? Thanks!

Here are the Novels & Movies threads that were created a while ago:

All about Books ~ Discussion Welcome


[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Movie Mania ~ Discussion

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Let me know if you want a new combined thread created and I will be happy to make it. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Thanks! This is a good idea! :Biggrin:

[notguilty]

For DWTS

Then we have this new immunity dance thing. As ABC explained it online, “After each couple has danced, the top couple based on judges' scores will be safe from elimination for the week. The remaining six couples will then take part in the Dance Off, where they'll compete against another couple doing the Cha-Cha, Jive or Rumba. For each of the three face-offs, the judges will declare a winning team, who'll be able to add three bonus points to their score.” Make of that what you will.

Been hopping to other DWTS forums and some are clearly not happy with this development. I am betting that on the dance off it will be
Sean vs Andy as they have almost the same level of skills (or lack thereof). Although Andy has the rhythm and very entertaining.

I worry about Andy because DWTS seems to be pitting him against Sean who has the fanbase. This is also the reason why Sean is
having serious backlash among dwts fans (not bach fans). This is probably something that the PTB didn't foresee, that Andy Dick
will be seen as more of the hero than Sean since the former has a real struggle than he is overcoming and he is taking this stint seriously.
With Sean, the average dwts fan who haven't heard of him before thinks he is just promoting his wedding and wanting to extend his 15
mins.

[Guest]

I have seen ads for the comedy show with Andy, DL and several other comedians. I wonder if ABC or a DWTS producer has any stake in that show's success?

[Amberish]

For DWTS

Then we have this new immunity dance thing. As ABC explained it online, “After each couple has danced, the top couple based on judges' scores will be safe from elimination for the week. The remaining six couples will then take part in the Dance Off, where they'll compete against another couple doing the Cha-Cha, Jive or Rumba. For each of the three face-offs, the judges will declare a winning team, who'll be able to add three bonus points to their score.” Make of that what you will.

Been hopping to other DWTS forums and some are clearly not happy with this development. I am betting that on the dance off it will be
Sean vs Andy as they have almost the same level of skills (or lack thereof). Although Andy has the rhythm and very entertaining.

I worry about Andy because DWTS seems to be pitting him against Sean who has the fanbase. This is also the reason why Sean is
having serious backlash among dwts fans (not bach fans). This is probably something that the PTB didn't foresee, that Andy Dick
will be seen as more of the hero than Sean since the former has a real struggle than he is overcoming and he is taking this stint seriously.
With Sean, the average dwts fan who haven't heard of him before thinks he is just promoting his wedding and wanting to extend his 15
mins.

Are you sure about Sean having a larger fanbase than Andy is enjoying now? Andy's judge's scores have consistently been lower than Sean's (and others voted off) and the guy is still around.

[atem]

I think Andy has a huge fan base, but I think that immunity thing they are doing this coming episode will have Andy in last place. The judges want Andy gone!

[cimcoe]

For DWTS

Then we have this new immunity dance thing. As ABC explained it online, “After each couple has danced, the top couple based on judges' scores will be safe from elimination for the week. The remaining six couples will then take part in the Dance Off, where they'll compete against another couple doing the Cha-Cha, Jive or Rumba. For each of the three face-offs, the judges will declare a winning team, who'll be able to add three bonus points to their score.” Make of that what you will.

Been hopping to other DWTS forums and some are clearly not happy with this development. I am betting that on the dance off it will be
Sean vs Andy as they have almost the same level of skills (or lack thereof). Although Andy has the rhythm and very entertaining.

I worry about Andy because DWTS seems to be pitting him against Sean who has the fanbase. This is also the reason why Sean is
having serious backlash among dwts fans (not bach fans). This is probably something that the PTB didn't foresee, that Andy Dick
will be seen as more of the hero than Sean since the former has a real struggle than he is overcoming and he is taking this stint seriously.
With Sean, the average dwts fan who haven't heard of him before thinks he is just promoting his wedding and wanting to extend his 15
mins.

Are you sure about Sean having a larger fanbase than Andy is enjoying now? Andy's judge's scores have consistently been lower than Sean's (and others voted off) and they guy is still around.

Based on last week's results, we can say for a fact that Andy, Ingo and Jacoby all had more votes than Sean since Andy and Jacoby both had a lower judges score and Ingo was tied with Sean in scores and they all stayed out of the bottom 2. Zendaya, Kellie and Aly had higher judges totals so we can't determine how their votes lined up against Sean, although it would be a safe assumption that they're pulling in more votes than him because I think they're all more popular than Ingo who we DO know for a fact pulled in more votes. So that would mean Sean had the lowest vote total out of everyone left in the competition as of last week. Things can change from week to week but I don't see Andy getting any less popular.

I haven't seen anyone on the various boards I've read that are happy with this dance off idea, because it sounds so manipulative all the way around. First of all the top scorer gets immunity from it, which means there can only be ONE top scorer, so the judges are going to know ahead of time they can't tie anyone at the top. According to Henry from the Troupe the second place scorer gets to pick who they dance off against, then the 3rd place scorer picks etc. How everyone lines up on the leaderboard won't necessarily be based on who dances the best as we saw last week when Jacoby ended up lower than Sean in total score.

I haven't found anything to like about this dumb twist.

[northernviewer]

If this is true..... what a friggin joke DWTS has become. Well it already is, the way they fix the results by overscoring.... but to add a last minute twist like this to keep an ABC contract in it, instead of letting him be eliminate by the viewers is just downright pathetic. Sean should be embarrassed if he gets the save over Andy in a fixed move like this.

[charriotoffire]

Whatever manipulation they are doing its too late now, Andy is smelling like roses while Seanie is smelling like a greasy snakesoil salesman.

Sean Lowe should probably fire his agent and hire Andy Dick's. He managed to look creepier and more desperate than Andy. A good agent would have an
emotional intelligence to pass up DWTS to protect his image since 1. he can't dance to save his life 2. He hates being criticized and it shows
3. Catherine is looking like an overenthusiastic but clueless groupie, not fair to her.
Is it really wise to have a reality tv show between a reality tv show and an extravagant very public wedding? No but greed trumps long term
sensible business strategies. They want to overstay on tv so they could earn a lot of connections and money but IMO they would
have had more respectable gigs if they didn't do DWTS. (including having a real relationship before getting married.)

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