Bachelorette 18 - Michelle Young - Dec 14 - Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

I agree with so many comments about Brandon - I'm over him and his smothering declarations of love and loyalty. I think Michelle likes him because he makes her feel safe - something she may not have had in previous relationships.

I feel Joe was too little, too late but regardless a mismatch with Michelle's energy. But I think they will be friends - they admire each other and hopefully can find a space of respect. Joe has surely benefited from learning to open up.

Oh Nayte - you who are so full of confidence needs a crack in the armor and not being in love before and being all in is your chink. Even Michelle's mom saying NO - he's not ready to be engaged will not be enough to derail this relationship. I think there is a risk with Nayte but trust that Michelle will guide him through the hard parts.

I love seeing the men fall hard - for most of them, it is a liberating experience. Seeing Joe cry in the limo brought out so much empathy from me. I hope he finds his HEA.

I really enjoyed listening to the Dear Shandy recap of this episode. Unlike the opinions of some on Twitter, they felt that Nayte's reactions were the most real as it came to love and expressing feelings. I didn't have a problem that he wasn't easily able to say ILY or even if he wasn't able to propose. I always find the proposal is the most unrealistic part of the show even though I know it seems to make viewers happy.

There really wasn't a real comparison between Michelle with Nayte vs the other guys. The only drama they can bring in is to cause us to doubt his feelings. The annoying thing to me is that Brendan says all the things that the show wants but it seems like he's talked himself into these big feelings about Michelle. They've done this before but it has to make it hard on the final couple when fans of the show feel that that the lead made a mistake, largely driven by editing.

albean99 wrote:I really enjoyed listening to the Dear Shandy recap of this episode. Unlike the opinions of some on Twitter, they felt that Nayte's reactions were the most real as it came to love and expressing feelings. I didn't have a problem that he wasn't easily able to say ILY or even if he wasn't able to propose. I always find the proposal is the most unrealistic part of the show even though I know it seems to make viewers happy.

There really wasn't a real comparison between Michelle with Nayte vs the other guys. The only drama they can bring in is to cause us to doubt his feelings. The annoying thing to me is that Brendan says all the things that the show wants but it seems like he's talked himself into these big feelings about Michelle. They've done this before but it has to make it hard on the final couple when fans of the show feel that that the lead made a mistake, largely driven by editing.

I listened to a bit of Nayte's interview on Clickbait and he came across as extremely mature, level-headed, pragmatic and realistic about this situation. His approach to love was very rooted and he was able to explain his relationship history and why he hadn't been in love before. Essentially he said that he's obviously cared for women in the past but never could find a situation in which his head and his heart aligned. Michelle is the first person that is true with for him. He also said that people are complex and the complexity of an emotion as big as love is only boiled down to loving or being in love. He just felt that it wasn't that simple. As for dinner, he said what his point was is that life is filled with unpredictable situations and uncertainties. He can't say for sure what will happen after the show. Just as he couldn't say for sure what would happen when he left Canada, moved to WA not enrolled in school with no job or when he booked a one way ticket to Austin 2 days before graduation with no job. But just as in those 2 situations, he trusted in himself and was sure that he would figure it out. And here he felt the same- he trusted himself that he was falling in love with Michelle and wanted to be with her and he trusted Michelle. Apparently the conversation was spliced in a way that made that less clear. In any case, it makes sense.

The other extremely obvious thing is that Nayte is very intelligent. Michelle used that as the one word to describe him when asked and it's much easier to see that when he's given a platform to actually speak. All in all, he just seems to be someone who approached his relationship with Michelle as a real one that happened to be occurring in the context of a show. He is the real deal and came across as very authentically himself. I understand why Michelle is very drawn to that.

@appiah01 It sounds like they are very similar in that respect. I find Michelle to be one of the most intelligent and grounded Bette's ever. She seems to be secure within herself and her own judgement. She respects the guys and expects to be respected in return. When she disagrees with them, she doesn't throw a fit like many previous Bettes. She speaks up for herself, but is still respectful to them. I couldn't see her falling for some idiot frat boy. She would pick someone on her own level.

I am looking forward to what awaits Michelle...with or without a fiance.

Nayte also said that his stepdad talked with him and also Michelle a long time. He talked to him after the episode aired and it seems that editing was selective as always. What I really like about Nayte is that he doesn't seem to let things bother him, even when his stepdad said that the didn't think he was ready for an engagement on national tv.

I watched Brandon's date with the sound off, since I was on a phone call with a friend. I noticed that he and Michelle laughed a lot and had off-the-charts chemistry with each other. Sound on for Joe's date, and I noticed that Michelle seemed to be bringing her energy level down to match his. Not a good sign. Nayte's date -- everything points to this being her person. I'm happy for them both, and wish them well.