Bachelorette 14 - Becca Kufrin - Media SM - Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers* #5

I think many single women go through a phase where they realize that everything is not what it was made out to be, and that the most intelligent, honest, hard-working, kindest, loyal, and courageous men have a very different outlook on life then people who hate everyone that is better than them, more honest then them, loves themselves, and have no concern for the irrational ramblings of wicked and self-serving manipulators.

Losing Arie may have been a wake-up call for Becca, as he clearly lost interest after he really got to know her. All IMO.

@rosefever So are you saying that as Arie found out that she was a feminist and liberal, he lost interest and went to a more submissive, conservative woman like Lauren?

I personally changed my views on a few things, so I believe people can change.

Btw, I gave Colton benefits of doubt and never raked coal over him.

Friendly reminder: the FOE button is a really great tool to avoid trolls and inflammatory posts!

sdmom wrote:I personally changed my views on a few things, so I believe people can change.

Btw, I gave Colton benefits of doubt and never raked coal over him.

People can change if they want to, I don't think he does. In my experience, couples with differences like these don't tend to change each other, it just becomes a thing they 'agree to disagree' on. Also Ashley Spivey quoted this tweet in relation to her thread about Garrett that imo is extremely important to note

Racism isn't a disagreement.
Homophobia isn't a disagreement.
Transphobia isn't a disagreement.
Bigots frame these as disagreements to justify their dehumanizing bigotry and violence and to rebuke self defense as "disproportionate response."
Don't let them.

— Swimp Witch (@ImpJen) May 23, 2018

ReneeM wrote:

sdmom wrote:I personally changed my views on a few things, so I believe people can change.

Btw, I gave Colton benefits of doubt and never raked coal over him.

People can change if they want to, I don't think he does.
Snipped...

I hope this is my last post on this topic, but always being cautiously optimistic, and not knowing who he is, especially now he deletes his IG, I can’t tell if Garrett wants to change or not. I hope with time and life experiences, Garrett, and everyone for that matter, will change for better.


@guardianangel, can we start my favorite thread, Screen Caps? I don’t know how many are still interested in sleuthing, but I still like to figure things out and analyze screencaps.

ReneeM wrote:

sdmom wrote:I personally changed my views on a few things, so I believe people can change.

Btw, I gave Colton benefits of doubt and never raked coal over him.

People can change if they want to, I don't think he does. In my experience, couples with differences like these don't tend to change each other, it just becomes a thing they 'agree to disagree' on. Also Ashley Spivey quoted this tweet in relation to her thread about Garrett that imo is extremely important to note

Racism isn't a disagreement.
Homophobia isn't a disagreement.
Transphobia isn't a disagreement.
Bigots frame these as disagreements to justify their dehumanizing bigotry and violence and to rebuke self defense as "disproportionate response."
Don't let them.

— Swimp Witch (@ImpJen) May 23, 2018

I totally agree with this post and Ashley S tweet ! If you look at her recent tweet where she found another thing this man liked it is disgusting . Sorry I do not see this man changing JMO

ReneeM wrote:

sdmom wrote:I personally changed my views on a few things, so I believe people can change.

Btw, I gave Colton benefits of doubt and never raked coal over him.

People can change if they want to, I don't think he does. In my experience, couples with differences like these don't tend to change each other, it just becomes a thing they 'agree to disagree' on. Also Ashley Spivey quoted this tweet in relation to her thread about Garrett that imo is extremely important to note

Racism isn't a disagreement.
Homophobia isn't a disagreement.
Transphobia isn't a disagreement.
Bigots frame these as disagreements to justify their dehumanizing bigotry and violence and to rebuke self defense as "disproportionate response."
Don't let them.

— Swimp Witch (@ImpJen) May 23, 2018

Caroline liked Ashley’s quoted tweet

https://mobile.twitter.com/CarolineLunny/likes

This is such a headscratcher for me.

How?

It's not about someone who is more liberal falling for someone more conservative.

Core values like that come out even in people who flat out lie about their values.

Very curious about their hometown date - the red flags would have come out then.

@sdmom sleuthing is my favorite part of the show. It’s like a huge jigsaw we all work on together. Team work. We get to know each other and have fun.

sdmom wrote:snipped


@guardianangel, can we start my favorite thread, Screen Caps? I don’t know how many are still interested in sleuthing, but I still like to figure things out and analyze screencaps.

There will always be sleuthing on this forum, even if I'm by myself.

We have been having an increase in new members, I hope they join the sleuthing!

I've been away all day and planned Sunday to through all the threads, making sure we are ready for premier night, and some other threads may need to be locked and moved out.

But, thanks for the reminder! Here it is!

S/caps thread

rosefever wrote:I think many single women go through a phase where they realize that everything is not what it was made out to be, and that the most intelligent, honest, hard-working, kindest, loyal, and courageous men have a very different outlook on life then people who hate everyone that is better than them, more honest then them, loves themselves, and have no concern for the irrational ramblings of wicked and self-serving manipulators.

Losing Arie may have been a wake-up call for Becca, as he clearly lost interest after he really got to know her. All IMO.

My ex-husband cheated on me with a woman who was less educated than I was and was happy to follow him in whatever he wanted to lead her too. It was the best thing for both of us. I found a man who is my equal and loves and respects me for who I am. After almost 20 years I can honestly say I hope they are still together and happy. Both of us found the better match for us through his dishonestly.

I hope for both Arie and Becca that they found their better match through Arie's confusion, mind changing and sneaking. IMO.

I personally kissed a few frogs before I found my right guy too, maybe IMO because as a smart intelligent woman with goals, dreams and opinions who also is a caring person who likes to help others it can be hard to find a who appreciates us and helps lift us up and not take more than they give. I have faith and hope that Becca like me will eventually find that. All JMO.

I am also happy that Arie seems to have found the woman better suited to him. IMO.


Mods, I hope it is okay to discuss Arie in this limited way in response to this post. It might be great to clarify during this crazy time if you wish to have Arie and Lauren left out of Becca's thread, so we can all follow the rules most effectively. Thank you.