Bachelorette 14 - Becca Kufrin - Media SM - Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers* #5

I think he should be called out. I think Becca should call him out. He should have to answer to her friends and family. He should be embarrassed and hopefully learn. And if the likes do not represent the man, he should prove it to the people that matter. But I don’t have to lesson my own principles in order to root for them to find happiness with each other, if that’s what they choose. I want that for everyone.

Again, of course there is no defence to outright hatred or prejudice.... however, I’m willing to consider that maybe a SM like has nothing to do with your heartfelt beliefs and who you are in your core... liking inappropriate posts or falling victim to fake news could be just that... being ignorant and showing lack of experience IMO.  

More than anything, I can appreciate that we as people evolve.  I care about someone’s heart intent and I hope Becca does too.  To cut people off who have beliefs different than yours, robs them (and you) of a potential chance of enlightenint and evolution IMO.

Personally I’d rather be with someone who is wanting and willing to evolve rather than someone who says and does all the right PC things but behind closed doors has an ugly heart.  Been there, done that, no thanks.

**edited**

What culture is Garrett from? His name isn’t typically American so I’m just wondering.

“When people show you who they are, believe them.” Maya Angelou

Alanna wrote:What culture is Garrett from? His name isn’t typically American so I’m just wondering.

He is American, at least his grandparents and parents were born here....his last name has some South American origin; all these per a poster that investigated it and posted it in his contestant thread sometime ago.

mercieme wrote:

Alanna wrote:What culture is Garrett from? His name isn’t typically American so I’m just wondering.

He is American, at least his grandparents and parents were born here....his last name has some South American origin; all these per a poster that investigated it and posted it in his contestant thread sometime ago.

Thanks. Some cultures I’m familiar with through friends/family hold really, ummm, “conservative” beliefs too and they’re normal, par for the course and there’s no thought that they might be extreme even. I was curious if Garrett fell into that bucket. Not saying it’s right or wrong, just is what it is.

stuckinsc wrote:@sparkler I appreciate your insight. My view is a bit different. He thinks it is okay to mock people, those types of posts are endorsed by him. While he may not say the words directly his support (along with others) emboldens hateful posters to keep spreading their vehemence.

The graduate school I went to had social media/ ethics training for all new students. What you do and say online can cost you your career.

The posts alone disturb me less than the amount of disturbing posts he liked. This was over months and as recent as February. Unfortunately, when you repeatedly do this are you not showing the world who you are?

I also think in someway likes are just as bad as hateful posts. It emboldens the hater and gives them positive feedback they want to continue.

All JMO.

I cant like this post enough.(bolding added).
Fleiss and Co. have no excuse whatsoever for not vetting social media - which most employers do as part of the hiring process. I imagine that in future seasons, cast members will be required to delete social media before being finally cast and before their names can be discovered. That being said - I feel really badly for Becca.

JMO, I will be as hard on Garrett as I am on anyone who thinks the kids brave enough to step up after a school shooting are actors. To clarify, the stupid belief was not that the shooting did not take place, it was that the kids stepping up and speaking after it were not real students at the school, they were “crisis” actors. As ignorant as I find that news channel, they did NOT say the shooting did not happen. It is still gross. The commentators then went on to make fun of one of the teenagers for not getting into colleges. Class act that news channel that spreads conspiracies and “fake” news.

I have actually unfriended people for liking crap like this, whereas my conservative family and friends have serious discussions, because we both listen and learn. My friend who was worried about transgendered people trying to hurt her child in the bathroom just needed to hear that those people just don’t want to be afraid in the bathroom themselves. We taught her statistics of how most child predators actually act.

Why would I prefer Becca not bother? Because it has been two to three weeks, so they are still in the bubble and still don’t really know the real world version of each other. I want Becca happy and joyful, if helping Garrett makes her happy that is great. Then stay with him, but she tried to help Ross for seven years, I would rather her find the person who loves and supports/helps here. She shouldn’t have to change or fix him, she had already spent close to a decade doing that with someone else. I am a “fixer”, I always try to help people. My favorite priest when advising me once told me that just because I could help someone didn’t mean I had to. It was okay for me to look for and demand a person who was less work and more equal for myself. It was freeing to realize I could say no thanks without being selfish or unchristian.

All JMO and JME.

Alanna wrote:

mercieme wrote:

Alanna wrote:What culture is Garrett from? His name isn’t typically American so I’m just wondering.

He is American, at least his grandparents and parents were born here....his last name has some South American origin; all these per a poster that investigated it and posted it in his contestant thread sometime ago.

Thanks. Some cultures I’m familiar with through friends/family hold really, ummm, “conservative” beliefs too and they’re normal, par for the course and there’s no thought that they might be extreme even. I was curious if Garrett fell into that bucket. Not saying it’s right or wrong, just is what it is.

Garrett is from Reno and it’s not the most diverse place...

@stuckinsc Yah I totally agree, the SandyHook hoax is mind blowingly outrageous just like the 911 hoax and the Holocaust disbelievers... like WTF.
I agree too about Becca being a fixer, however, I think it’s totally different trying to fix a serial cheater than someone who may just be ignorant but capable of evolving IMO. The fact he deleted his entire SM shows me he’s not entirely unreedemabke.

BachIsMyGuiltyPleasure wrote:@stuckinsc  Yah I totally agree, the SandyHook hoax is mind blowingly outrageous just like the 911 hoax and the Holocaust disbelievers... like WTF.  
I agree too about Becca being a fixer, however, I think it’s totally different trying to fix a serial cheater than someone who may just be ignorant but capable of evolving IMO.  The fact he deleted his entire SM shows me he’s not entirely unreedemabke.

I think deleting his SM is cowardly. He likes things making fun of others, but when the bullying turned on him, he tucks tail and hides. I have no respect for people who make fun of others and then get upset when it gets turned on them.

I would respect him more if he acknowledged his stupidity and addressed it. All JMO.

I am sorry, Garrett deleting his SM tells me nothing of whether he is redeemable or not, he could have simply deleted it because he does not want to be bothered by folks that were posting there calling him out or maybe the show told him to...I do believe folks can change but they will have to prove it over time.

Anywhoo...for those on SM, do you know if Becca is still following Ashley Spivey on Twitter or IG? I ask because Ashely is still being outspoken about this and IMO she won’t let it go anytime soon. Just wondering if Becca will unfollow at some point since I read on this thread that she is still following Ashley as of a couple of days ago...TYIA.