Bachelor 22 - Arie Luyendyk Jr - SM Media - *Sleuthing Spoilers* - #4

I like Becca but she knew there was a possibility she could get hurt by doing the show. Was Arie supposed to pretend to keep up a relationship with her if he wasn't feeling it anymore and knew he felt strongly about someone else and thought it could work better with that person? . We also only know that he ended it because he still had feelings for Lauren, but is it possible there's more to the story than that?
My biggest issue is why he didn't just pick Lauren to begin with. I don't see anything wrong with him saying he's happy if he is. Is is he supposed to lie about that or not answer the question?

*This is all IMO*

The thing is whether the viewer likes it or not, this show is not about compassion, empathy, sympathy or any of those lovely sentiments. IMO
This is never what it's been about. This is a Michael Fleiss creation. Production is going to do whatever they can do to make it a dating Chainsaw Massacre.
Arie's own friend, Cassie Lambert drove the bus that ran him down with Emily his first go round. Compassion?   I don't think so. 
So bringing those things out in the lead, no matter who he or she is, is not going to happen. TPTB don't want that. 
Other leads have said did not want ____________ to get down on a knee and propose and had little choice about that. Other leads have said they wanted to let __________ go easier or give that person an idea they were not the one.  Other leads have openly skinny dipped with women in front of others. Other leads have allowed women into their private room with the other women knowing. 
I don't think MF wants a touchy, feely show. JMO

Interviews are coached and I feel that Arie does not have the freedom right now to say much other than he is happy.

I think this quote by Millsy is very important.

From the start, much of this season has been about what fans think of Arie. What will fans think of him after the finale? I don’t know because so much of it is live, and [depends on] how Arie handles himself there. wrote: wrote:

I think that this will be the true test. If Arie shows no compassion or empathy for Becca when he is sitting on the sofa live next to her then I have no words. IMO he needs to let her have her anger, sadness and vent to him and not diminish her feelings. But if he can do that it will be better for him. I don't think he is dumb enough to think that he did not cause her pain but he wants to tell her and the audience how it all played out, maybe soften the blow. We still don't know all the details. But I also know TPTB would love it if got contentious and she ripped him one. If she were the new bachelorette it would certainly help with the public rooting for her season.

Also just my personal opinion but I don't see him saying he is happy as an insult to Becca because he also has Lauren's feelings to consider. If he says he is just okay with his final choice, admits he did everything wrong or refuses to say if he is happy or not then it does not sound very good for him convincing Lauren she is the one he wants to be with.

Kashathediva wrote:Am I missing something? Caroline made him a tape of songs. He played it while he had 1:1 time with a friend of hers, possibly the other 2 women. And there is outrage over this? 
Ok.

I just thought it was funny because Caroline already has an ax to grind with Arie, then he takes the mix tape and plays it for another girl. I figured this would make her even more disgusted with him.

FWIW, everyone will survive this big switcheroo. Arie will be okay. Lauren will be okay and even Becca will be okay. The world will keep turning. I have a feeling this board will be full of opinions come Monday night.

It is hard for me to believe that Arie won't be empathetic to Becca. He has shown compassion and empathy to all contestants except for Krystal and maybe one other whose name I cannot remember. We saw him shocked about Bekah's age, yet was so comforting to her when he let her go.

No doubt Arie is in a dung heap . You reap what you sow, a catch 22, damn if he does, damn if he doesn’t . This is all on him. I despise Jef but dang it if he didn’t call it. No matter who comes out of the limo, they won’t last a year . Sorry but Becca has to be counted as that one. I think Arie will find a way to spin out of this even if it’s a quickie marriage that produces a destiny child. If he learns from this and is all the wiser, then good for him.
Jmo

This is what I still find strange the other women say either they understand Arie or that they saw it coming, Also Arie has shown compassion to a lot of the women even Krystal before the whole "Needle Dick" thing, but not really to Becca, but we really don't have any thing that may point to her doing something to Arie so this is way I'm still waiting to see how all of this plays out.JMO

Also in this Bekah basically says she thinks Caroline is doing it more for fame than for anything else which is interesting. And in an interview Caroline said she was going to crash the bowling date in episode 5.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBqefV9zfqg

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Above vid^^^^^^
Something interesting Beks said when she talked to Arie to get closure . He really didn’t give her a solid chance from the beginning since he knew she was 22. He was looking for ways for their relationship not to work and he admitted that she was right.
1:50. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^(Modus operandi imo)

Regarding fame, in one way or another , they are ALL looking for fame . Beks might get the biggest fame and recognition than all of them. Heck , she’s already been on JK imo.
Regarding Caroline, If Beks was in Becca’s company the day before WTA filming , would she could she be as objective as she feels Caroline wasn’t ?

Beks said Becca was very sincere and that’s what Arie was drawn to. . Lauren represented all the women Arie has always been attracted to in the past including Emily. Whether he would go along with that dating pattern in the past or branch out and try something new.

This girl really gets Arie imo!

Mommyof2 wrote:I just thought it was funny because Caroline already has an ax to grind with Arie, then he takes the mix tape and plays it for another girl.  I figured this would make her even more disgusted with him.

IMO the best explanation of the mix tape is what I found here:

... she revealed exclusively to Us Weekly that during her time in the house, she made Arie a mixtape — all of her favorite songs put onto a USB. Later, she learned he listened to it with another woman. “I found out he later used it in the fantasy suite. I’m friends with Becca and she told me! She was like, ‘Oh my God we listened to your thing,’” Caroline explained. “It’s fine because he knew that we were really close, but I was kind of, like, ‘That’s a little off-sides buddy, playing my fu—ing mixtape.’”

IMO the best definition of the phrase "much ado about nothing" - see the above.

Aria wrote:I was watching Tia's interview with extraTV and it was interesting - she said that the girls all saw all along how strong his connection with Becca was since she had the first date (goes along with what Annalise said), but she had no idea that he liked Lauren that much until she saw the show. It's always interesting to see what people in the cast say, since they usually know who's going to win (like with Bryan, OG Lauren B, Shawn, Emily Maynard, Jordan, Vanessa, etc), but it seems like Lauren was a shock to everyone. IMO.

I do understand what Tia is saying, but OTOH even she stated after hometowns that she felt that she, Lauren and Becca were the logical picks -- almost certainly because both Becca and Lauren got two 1-on-1s, and she herself got one. Kendall never got any. Lauren's two 1-on-1s, especially since they were late in the game and back to back, should have been a strong clue that she was a serious contender. My guess is that Lauren is one to play her cards close to her chest. I also think the women may have placed too much emphasis on Becca getting the first 1-on-1 and calling Arie her "boyfriend."

I see Arie as being a player, which means that the odds are not great for any one particular woman. It doesn't mean that he is a bad person, just that a woman has to know the odds are low going in. Warren Beatty and George Clooney were similar -- both men having a long and varied dating life before finding "the one." These guys usually do eventually find their match, and may have their hearts broken once or twice along the way. My belief is that a part of it is that they get to a point in life where dating loses its appeal. Is Arie at that point? Maybe, but my guess is not. I feel sorry for Becca that she was treated so absmally, but in the end, Lauren may fare no better.

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Adding to my thoughts on Arie being a player -- I think that Bekah was his best match, because she took him about as seriously as he deserved, which is to say, not so much. Arie was well aware that she was as ready to walk as he was. She was on to him, and he knew it. And they were great with each other.

Lucas15 wrote:

Mommyof2 wrote:I just thought it was funny because Caroline already has an ax to grind with Arie, then he takes the mix tape and plays it for another girl.  I figured this would make her even more disgusted with him.

IMO the best explanation of the mix tape is what I found here:

... she revealed exclusively to Us Weekly that during her time in the house, she made Arie a mixtape — all of her favorite songs put onto a USB. Later, she learned he listened to it with another woman. “I found out he later used it in the fantasy suite. I’m friends with Becca and she told me! She was like, ‘Oh my God we listened to your thing,’” Caroline explained. “It’s fine because he knew that we were really close, but I was kind of, like, ‘That’s a little off-sides buddy, playing my fu—ing mixtape.’”

IMO the best definition of the phrase "much ado about nothing" - see the above.

Eh, I'm okay with an off-side call and a bit of sniping. At least she didn't yellow card him.

[quote="Amethyst"]

Aria wrote:

I see Arie as being a player, which means that the odds are not great for any one particular woman. It doesn't mean that he is a bad person, just that a woman has to know the odds are low going in. Warren Beatty and George Clooney were similar -- both men having a long and varied dating life before finding "the one." These guys usually do eventually find their match, and may have their hearts broken once or twice along the way. My belief is that a part of it is that they get to a point in life where dating loses its appeal. Is Arie at that point? Maybe, but my guess is not. I feel sorry for Becca that she was treated so absmally, but in the end, Lauren may fare no better.

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r.

I agree with this and I also think it is when the player finally thinks about starting a family that means a serious change to his lifestyle. They can circle the airport for a long time but if they really want to have a family, they finally have to land. Arie appears to really want kids knowing that 40 will be here very soon so it may be that he realizes he has to start getting serious about commitment and a stable relationship if he really wants fatherhood. There will always be another pretty woman so he has to decide and if he can't well then I guess he continues his playboy lifestyle. IMO I do think he is questioning whether that playboy fun will bring happiness forever especially if it means never having a family of his own.

I can see where his indecision over Lauren vs. Becca makes one question whether or not he is capable of choosing one woman.


Whether he is truly ready to settle down and honestly wants marriage I don't know. I guess we will know in a couple of months as I suspect if he does break it off with Lauren because he is DM'ing someone else, it will make the press. I am actually hoping it works out with Lauren and this is what he wants.