Bachelor 22 - Arie Luyendyk Jr - SM Media - *Sleuthing Spoilers* - #4

I've always liked Arie and I'm certainly not a Peter fan. This has nothing to do with Peter or being a fan of one girl more than the other.  

My problem with Arie's actions are solely on Arie and him continuing his shady behavior that I used to be more willing to give him the benefit of the doubt on.  

I'd call out any other lead for doing the same crap Arie has, so he gets no pass nor will I make excuses for him.  It was not all TPTB and manipulation no matter how this all plays out and at some point he better own his behavior.  And rewriting it and acting as if Becca never happened, well that's not owning it, IMO.  Man up Arie.  

JMO

@Ladybug82 I agree. If anything I am anti-Peter and I still think Arie is a self centered douche. IMO.

Ok, I get that LB. I just keep going back to the fact that we don't know what he's done yet. Or why. But the boy is being burned at the stake already. For all any of us know, there were some very well thought out solid reasons for his choices. Maybe not, maybe he's a dou*he, maybe he really is a fickle little pickle. I don't have the info yet is all I'm sayin. There's obviously something very weird that happened though....

How sure are we of the switch at this point? Nickgate during Andi's season sure?

@BKay JMO, calling out Arie’s actions is not burning him at the stake. People are not saying he deserves bad things, or wishing him ill. They are simply stating the counter argument to his actions not being his own responsibilities. This board and the press have been much kinder to Arie then then most were to JPG. Many posters here still use negative names for JPG and he was honest to his women and stood up to TPTB manipulation, when giving in would have been much easier for him.

Heck Brad 1.0 was raked over the coals and Jason was hated. Arie is still being treated nicely, no stakes yet. IMO.

Or (IMO) Arie was just being Arie... . Doesn't make him evil or a bad person, his actions just don't match his words, again IMO.  And IMO he's probably not as ready to settle down as he wants us to think.

All I know is LB better limit or keep an eye on how much time he spends creeping on IG if she truly wants a relationship with him. IMSO

All leads end up getting slaughtered, even when they don't say they are in love with multiple people or pull a switch, so I don't see why Arie would be an exception when he's done just that.  And IMO we are tame compared to what's coming.  He better buckle up because I don't think everyone's going to love the ending he's so excited for us all to watch.  

JMO

@stuckinsc ok, maybe I'm being overly sensitive for him. And I'm not a superfan of his or anything, but I can't judge his actions because I don't know yet what he did. (Now JPG, I couldn't stand, but not because he didn't get engaged or whatever. It was his condescending attitude that I disliked.)

Can we please keep the posts on contestants only per forum rules and not on fellow members. TY

Ladybug82 wrote:Or (IMO) Arie was just being Arie... . Doesn't make him evil or a bad person, his actions just don't match his words, again IMO.  And IMO he's probably not as ready to settle down as he wants us to think.

All I know is LB better limit or keep an eye on how much time he spends creeping on IG if she truly wants a relationship with him. IMSO

All leads end up getting slaughtered, even when they don't say they are in love with multiple people or pull a switch, so I don't see why Arie would be an exception when he's done just that.  And IMO we are tame compared to what's coming.  He better buckle up because I don't think everyone's going to love the ending he's so excited for us all to watch.  

JMO

I'm not sure he doesn't cringe everytime TPTB write that scenario for him. He was crucified as early as Ep. 3, it's going to be picking up the pieces at the slaughterhouse by the time SM is done with him.

I can't figure out if Lauren will be as devastated by the nastiness as most would or if she'll let it roll off her back. It's going to be interesting to watch it play out over 6 months, though. JMO

If he was so torn at the end then the very last thing he should’ve done was propose. Other things Arie shouldn’t have done:
1. Trolled Lauren’s social media while engaged and liked her pictures.
2. Called multiple exes while engaged.
3. Go on and on about how happy he is right after the switch.
4. Completely disregard his feelings for Becca which seems to be his M.O. based on his blog posts and social media. JMO
5. Not done the d@mn show in the first place since I think it’s very obvious he has no clue what he really wants and probably doesn’t want to truly get married to begin with.

All JMO

IMO, I'd consider many of the comments equal to burning at the stake. But each to their own, I guess. I just can't see calling a man the names he's been called when I don't even know him or know the whole story of what went down during filming. I've followed Arie for years, and followed most of the women he's dated. There's a lot more to the stories than what RS and a few exes choose to share. IMO, Arie acts about like most single guys his age. He doesn't try to hurt women, in fact I think he tries really hard not to hurt them. If any thing, I feel that IRL he needs to be more blunt with women who are totally chasing him and wishful thinking about his commitment to them.

We have heard great comments about Arie from Emily and from women who have been on his show. Myself, I'll choose to believe those comments. I just can't see crucifying the man verbally just because of a few rumors and a lot of speculation. JMO

@beader I agree. 
I have not made a scrutinizing study of his past behavior anymore or any less than other cast, but you summed up what I have seen with him. 
IMO for a man in his 30's, I don't think Arie did anything so horrible. JMO  To me this is no worse than sleeping with your F3 on the fantasy dates and then getting engaged. In fact to me, it's less worse. JMO
In this show you get basically what 3-4 dates with the F1/F2 prior to the FRC. Then you get engaged. I have had longer relationships with men I have ended up detesting or thinking "what kind of messed up was I?" to even consider this guy to begin with.  Maybe it's his farting in his sleep, his toenails, his corny jokes. Who knows, but not everything is rainbows and unicorns even when you do date a while and this show is not even close to dating awhile. 
Cut your losses and wasting your own time and someone else's if it's not right. Move on. JMO 
Couples that have made it on this show all say the relationship basically begins post show. This is his post show whether it works or not. 
Could things have been handled with more finesse? IDK with this show and MF probably not too much more. This is not the show for rainbows and unicorns. JMO