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Post by Guest Wed Aug 23, 2017 10:21 am

I'm a Chinese and live in Hong Kong, we do talk a lot about this kind of issue as a matter of fact, rather than trying to be mean to the couples. Such as if we know our friend dates a white guy, we just state it as a fact that she dates a white guy. It doesn't have any negative meaning, as simple as we notice the inter-racial relationship she is having. But doesn't it mean anything negative? No.

so maybe it's cultural difference that stating a black girl dates a white guy can be seen as a character attack. I did discuss with a mod recently, I don't understand why it seems like such a big deal in the America. And I'm not being snarky, I do really having trouble understanding that.

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Post by GuardianAngel Wed Aug 23, 2017 10:25 am

I wouldn't say it's a big deal in America, if you are referring to North America and including Canada. It's no big deal to me at all, and very rarely post my opinion because I simply do not understand the logic. Like I said months ago, I'm Italian background, am I suppose to only date and marry and Italian?

It's ludicrous to me. I live in a very diverse country/community. It's not unusual to see interracial of all walks of life. My cousin was catholic, he is now Jewish. He's Italian. He married a Jewish women. My other cousin is Italian, he married a Spanish girl. My brother in law has two nieces, both Italian, both married Muslim.

They are all loved equally. It's insane that I'm even talking about this.


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Post by ElonM Wed Aug 23, 2017 10:33 am

bleuberry wrote:People have been talking about how white the show is for years. In fact many called this discussion (Rachel's top picks being mostly white) months ago. IMO this is nothing new, and a black Bachelor wouldn't be spared. JMO.

I also disagree that her black choices weren't great. I thought there were several great ones. She just didn't vibe with them or they weren't her type.  Nothing wrong with that.

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Post by Chgohighlife Wed Aug 23, 2017 10:34 am

Cocoasneeze wrote:Why on earth is Demario putting this even out there? Why is he putting it on Rachel to lift up black men, when he and his fellow black men (at least Eric) have not done a thing to uplift Rachel, the first black lead this show has ever had? Demario, who's two public dating choices where that white ex we saw on the show, and Miss Platinum Vag**e.  
And let's look at the black men Rachel had to pick from. One was a guy had a crush on her from third grade, but hasn't had any contact with her in 15 years, but suddenly he wanted to pursue her, once she got the lead role. Not. Suspect. At. All. Then the guy who had never dated black women before. Yeah. Sure, Rachel, should've  picked him, he SURELY was into Rachel.  Then Demario. Yeah, just no. Eric seemed to be the only even remotely logical option, but his after show interviews have showed his lacking in logical thought, perhaps Rachel saw that during filming too.

Also, I've never heard any white lead being dragged this much for not picking a black F1. There have been literal think pieces about Rachel's supposed 'self hatred', because she didn't pick one of these fine specimen of  black men. Rachel had her entire race on her shoulders, according to some, and she failed them, because she picked a 'white man'.

I also have to add, that, I'm not from the US, so I don't know the official racial map in the US, but in other countries, it's not only black or white, there are multiple other races too. Imo Rachel didn't pick a 'white man', as if it mattered any way. Bryan very proudly seems to embrace and proclaim his Colombian heritage, he's a very proud Latino man.

Ending my way too long post, I'm going to say, that, IMO  as long as these men keep shading her and dragging her, I'm gladly cheering her on, when she calls them out. How tiring for her having to every other day get notifications, how these weak, insecure men decide to open their mouths to drag Rachel and use her to get more attention. Rachel doesn't need to be 'classy' when these men try to drag her. After her season ended, she's never been the one to attack or shade first, it's always been a response to her or Bryan getting dragged.  Jmo

Cocoasneeze, YOU SAID IT!!! squad - Rachel Lindsay & Bryan Abasolo - Bachelorette 13 - Discussion  - Page 14 1176891977clapping!thumbsup

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Post by Chgohighlife Wed Aug 23, 2017 10:41 am

Sprite wrote:
Chgohighlife wrote:Excellent post as always, Aria. Love your insight and compassion. DeMario has quite a nerve being so insulting and nasty and his venom is quite misdirected, IMO. If he allowed ABC to milk its unjust treatment of him for all this time and $$$ without compensating him, he is a fool, IMO. 

Rachel is not perfect so every now and then, she makes a mistake. She is however an extraordinary young woman, as time will tell, IMO. Beyond this franchise, she will continue to flourish and being the Bachelorette has helped her identify the greatest gift of her life, Bryan.  I really believe that together they are an amazing power couple. JMO


Early days yet.

You're right, Sprite. Time will tell but, I'm betting on them.

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Post by Aria Wed Aug 23, 2017 10:42 am

bleuberry wrote:People have been talking about how white the show is for years. In fact many called this discussion (Rachel's top picks being mostly white) months ago. IMO this is nothing new, and a black Bachelor wouldn't be spared. JMO.

I also disagree that her black choices weren't great. I thought there were several great ones. She just didn't vibe with them or they weren't her type.  Nothing wrong with that.

People have talked about how white the show is, but I don't remember the last time we talked about racial preference when it comes to the lead. I get that usually the lead/F1 are of the same race, so it's not a big deal, but even when they're not, it's never been a thing. No one said "omg, Sean was clearly never going to pick a white girl since his last ex was black and Catherine was Asian!". No one said "omg, Byron's two exes were WOC and he picked a Latina women. White girls never had a chance!". Or no one said "Juan Pablo's final four was all white! He clearly hates Latina women!". When Rachel has repeatedly said that she has never brought a white guy home before Nick and that she's primarily dated black men (including her last 5-year boyfriend, who she wanted to marry), it is gross to constantly speak on her behalf and say that she only likes white men.  

Also, I'm pretty sure I remember Demario bragging all night one how he was going to win and bragging all about how he was going to get the group date rose on the basketball date, so I call major bull on the whole "I called this from night one". I listened to the majority of that interview and Demario is a pathological liar, so I don't take anything he says seriously. Also funny/ironic how he hard-core defended Lee saying we can't judge him from a couple of tweets, but he can judge Rachel based on a couple of guys? Sounds fair. IMO.

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Post by jalkire Wed Aug 23, 2017 10:51 am

Here's the thing when your the first African American to do something everything you do is going to be scrutinized to death and I feel like Rachel knows this. That's why I don't understand why she's giving this topic and Demario any energy. IMO she needs to just ignore it because here response adds fuel to the fire.

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Post by Guest Wed Aug 23, 2017 10:51 am

GuardianAngel wrote:I wouldn't say it's a big deal in America, if you are referring to North America and including Canada. It's no big deal to me at all, and very rarely post my opinion because I simply do not understand the logic. Like I said months ago, I'm Italian background, am I suppose to only date and marry and Italian?

It's ludicrous to me. I live in a very diverse country/community. It's not unusual to see interracial of all walks of life. My cousin was catholic, he is now Jewish. He's Italian. He married a Jewish women. My other cousin is Italian, he married a Spanish girl. My brother in law has two nieces, both Italian, both married Muslim.

They are all loved equally. It's insane that I'm even talking about this.

So that's why I'm so confused this season.
It's a commonly seen situation everywhere, but when people discuss it, it could be interpreted as making a scene about interracial relationship. hmmm

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Post by bleuberry Wed Aug 23, 2017 11:05 am

@Aria I agree no one really brought it up with past leads, but the very mention of Sean and others not getting this makes me think this isn't something many people understand. I get why DeMario went there and I get why it pisses Rachel off. And I can 100% believe this is something the other guys thought about, DeMario's the only idiot blabbing about it publicly IMO.


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Post by Chgohighlife Wed Aug 23, 2017 11:16 am

FashionLover wrote:Prelude: I'm black, this may or may not be important but it gives context

From personal experience, it absolutely pisses the heck out of me when people make statements like "Oh, you're acting so white" (urgh that's the worst one btw) or "you listen to such white music" or literally anytime someone assigns my mannerisms and choices a specific race. So I absolutely understand why rachel was annoyed by Demario's statement and how she chose to respond is her prerogative. However, she should now understand she is in the public eye and everyone is gonna feel entitled to give in their two cents about her life and choices. She is fairly new to this "fame" game so hopefully overtime, she will know how to just brush it off.

I actually don't think Demario meant any harm when he made that statement. He based his opinion off of the two weeks he was with rachel, which may have been a stupid thing to do, but what he said translated on TV as well IMO. Rachel is so easy to read and her 1 on 1 time with the guys she wasn't interested in was comical to watch. IMO it just so happened that the group she was presented included peter (my gawd that man is ..whew squad - Rachel Lindsay & Bryan Abasolo - Bachelorette 13 - Discussion  - Page 14 1f4a6 ) and Bryan,  who isn't too bad either. I think she actually liked will but we know how that went laugh out loud. people I was watching with made similar statements, and that's just cause of how it played out on TV.

Conclusion: People have opinions, and when you put yourself out their especially for entertainment purposes, you can't expect them to be all good. So I hope rachel realizes that soon enough and go about living her best life

ETA: Anthony was a snack and it was sad to see him go (just wanted to say that laugh out loud, not of particular importance). Sad he didn't vibe with  

The things Demario said about Rachel were intentionally, pointedly hurtful, IMO. He knows it. She knows it and everyone who understands the intended damage knows it. There are negative, painful hot buttons in every culture, every religion, ever region, every body type, every ethnicity, every profession, every sexual preference, every everything and it's quite ok if everyone doesn't get it because it goes directly to the heart of the intended audience and does it's damage while other people are underneath its radar. 

The fact that I may not get or understand a specific slur against another culture or, religion or, short people or whatever means nothing because the people it was meant to hurt, still very much are hurt. All JMO

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Post by teambigrach Wed Aug 23, 2017 11:20 am

Chgohighlife wrote:
FashionLover wrote:Prelude: I'm black, this may or may not be important but it gives context

From personal experience, it absolutely pisses the heck out of me when people make statements like "Oh, you're acting so white" (urgh that's the worst one btw) or "you listen to such white music" or literally anytime someone assigns my mannerisms and choices a specific race. So I absolutely understand why rachel was annoyed by Demario's statement and how she chose to respond is her prerogative. However, she should now understand she is in the public eye and everyone is gonna feel entitled to give in their two cents about her life and choices. She is fairly new to this "fame" game so hopefully overtime, she will know how to just brush it off.

I actually don't think Demario meant any harm when he made that statement. He based his opinion off of the two weeks he was with rachel, which may have been a stupid thing to do, but what he said translated on TV as well IMO. Rachel is so easy to read and her 1 on 1 time with the guys she wasn't interested in was comical to watch. IMO it just so happened that the group she was presented included peter (my gawd that man is ..whew squad - Rachel Lindsay & Bryan Abasolo - Bachelorette 13 - Discussion  - Page 14 1f4a6 ) and Bryan,  who isn't too bad either. I think she actually liked will but we know how that went laugh out loud. people I was watching with made similar statements, and that's just cause of how it played out on TV.

Conclusion: People have opinions, and when you put yourself out their especially for entertainment purposes, you can't expect them to be all good. So I hope rachel realizes that soon enough and go about living her best life

ETA: Anthony was a snack and it was sad to see him go (just wanted to say that laugh out loud, not of particular importance). Sad he didn't vibe with  

The things Demario said about Rachel were intentionally, pointedly hurtful, IMO. He knows it. She knows it and everyone who understands the intended damage knows it. There are negative, painful hot buttons in every culture, every religion, ever region, every body type, every ethnicity, every profession, every sexual preference, every everything and it's quite ok if everyone doesn't get it because it goes directly to the heart of the intended audience and does it's damage while other people are underneath its radar. 

The fact that I may not get or understand a specific slur against another culture or, religion or, short people or whatever means nothing because the people it was meant to hurt, still very much are hurt. All JMO

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Post by Alanna Wed Aug 23, 2017 11:21 am

Maybe I'd understand that this specific line of criticism by Demario is especially hurtful and deserves a response if she didn't feel the need to clap back all the time to pretty much anything. Good thing she's back with B and "doesn't have time today" I'm guessing laugh out loud


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