Re: Nick Viall - Bachelor 21 - FAN Forum - Discussion #25

[AllAboutLove]

Sharleen is a true gem. I've always said it, but my greatest hope is that Nick finds his own Sharleen

[notarose]

I am curious about what Nick enjoys during his quiet times at home. I wonder if he reads and if so, what kind of books, or is he a tv watcher and if so, what kind of shows. I'd love to hear about that aspect of him.

I love and admire Vanessa too, but I can see where her vibrancy might be a little too much for a quieter introvert. She seems like she's a big talker and my introverted self couldn't cope with that for long. Such are the dynamics that allow love to grow or make it wither and die, and you just don't know which it will be until you've spent alot of time together.

I can partially answer your questions based on past interviews he has given. He is a history buff with a special interest in reading about the post-WWII era in America. He also reads a lot of sports related stuff.  TV - sports and some dramas (like "Breaking Bad") and adult animation (like "Family Guy"). Movies - he's mentioned comedy and American period films. He also has always had an interest in vid gaming.
I do think introverts often partner with an extrovert.  The extrovert gets them out-and-about and once there they tend to enjoy it unless their extroverted partner leaves them stranded in a crowd without a person to chat with or in a loud environment.
In an interview Peta said Nick suffered from stage fright. I don't think she would have mentioned it unless it was significant. IMO trying to get over stage fright through dance is be a better step than public speaking. There is a partner you trust who can maintain eye contact and make it easier to forget about the public. Plus she, as his dance partner, guided him through the routine which can't be done in public speaking. I do think he attempted to overcome this type of anxiety by then appearing on 3 panels with a live audience. Doing is really the only possible way to increase comfort level.
Honestly, if everyone was an extrovert the world would be one very loud crazy place

@AllAboutLove @OnePromise

[Guest]

@notarose Thank you for the info! Hopefully these two kind-hearted people will each find their perfect person.

[MonicaJM2001]

There are alot of great postings I've read through and I totally see how the introvert vs extrovert stuff might have become an insurmountable obstacle ultimately. It actually has happened to me in a personal relationship where the guy was totally outgoing and super hyper while I was the introverted, more quiet one who preferred smaller group settings. It doesn't make one or the other wrong, bad or at fault or bad people it is just part of being humans with varying degrees of comfort and aspirations. An important part of a long lasting relationship IMO is being able to be oneself with their other half without having to make changes on either side. I've said all along and truly believe that both Nissa were committed to making it work and their love for one another was real and true and unfortunately they determined long lasting was not in the cards for them. Despite it not working out there is no doubt in my mind that Nick was absolutely right in choosing Vanessa to give the real world a try with over the other women he was dealt on his season. She was definitely the best match of the group. I think it was a risk worth taking even though the relationship has now come to an end. I wish both well though obviously for me my continued focus will now be on what Nick is up to and keeping up with whatever tidbits of his life he decides to share.

[Billysmom]

I can't help but wonder if it might have worked if they'd settled in Montreal. Vanessa was without a support system in la, and she even anticipated in her discussion with nicks sister that that might put a lot of pressure on the relationship. She seemed to do far better than I would have at building a life for herself in the states in spite of it all, but her family and friends back home seem to have given her so much affirmation over the years that she likely still felt a void, which perhaps even a loving fiancé could not fill. ????

It's funny to me, though, that during the Frc she had alluded to the fact that it is nick who loves to talk and that she was ready to do a lot if listening.... People have so many layers....like Ashley s's onion (but definitely not like Corinne's corn....)

[notarose]

 @MonicaJM2001
@Billysmom Introverts can enjoy talking a lot but 1-1 or in a small group. Even within his own large family but usually in that large a group setting they end up having a side convo with the person next to them. In a large group  where lots of people are talking at once they tend to defer to those who are most boisterous and become observers instead.

Ashley I interviewed. She basically refuses to throw anyone under the bus and is very diplomatic.
http://www.accesshollywood.com/videos/bachelor-nick-viall-vanessa-grimaldi-split-ashley-i-weighs-in/

[OnePromise]

I truely believe the press release that states they worked really hard on making the relationship work and are disappointed that it didn't. I saw Nick put forth great effort to try to include Vanessa in his LA life and show her priority above everything, esp in the beginning of their public relationship. I think that this is when the introvert vs. extrovert difference came into play. That type of investment into another person is very tiring to an introvert like Nick. On the other hand, Vanessa's extroverted nature would naturally thrive being the center of attention for Nick. And when Nick started to wear himself thin, he pulled back to renew himself, causing her to feel less the center of his world and less loved.  I saw a very tired Nick and a lack luster Vanessa near the end of the relationship.  I think that they tried very hard to make it work but without Vanessa's family and friends nearby, she was isolated and craving Nick's very limited energy. And they finally admitted that maybe the relationship was more work than it was worth. Nothing wrong with either party innately. Just not the best situation for the long term. Too much burn out for Nick. And too much isolation for Vanessa. All JMO of course.

This is a great article that I think describes Nick well. An extroverted introvert:

http://www.lifehack.org/297304/19-real-life-examples-extroverted-introvert-you-dont-get-confused

[AllAboutLove]

I don't think it would have mattered where they lived TBH. I think it would have always came down to their personality differences which weren't sustainable over time and based on the People mag article, is what is being said is exactly the case. Neither did anything wrong, and I think even if Nick moved to Montreal the result would have been the same. No doubt to me Nick chose the only viable person from his season for him and they both tried to make it work. That's all one could have hoped for and given how they even communicated on the show, I fully expect these two communicated and were totally honest with themselves and each other and for that I have great respect and wish them all the best

[happydays]

Nick seems to seek out Sharleen's wisdom when working through matters of the heart, esp those related to the shows. I thought it was a little strange when he was spending time at her Bachelorette party without Vanessa. Sharleen and Nick are really very similar and I think it helps him to hear her perspective on things. It is so nice that she seems to be defending him on SM with her latest Twitter post:

Because Vanessa was in Canada celebrating her nephew's birthday. And Nick showing up to sharleen's party was a surprise to sharleen herself.

[notarose]

Changing topic a bit
TVParty App - I'm fairly certain Vanessa's PR agent is also rep for the app because Lori Kreb was promoting it on Twitter for Big Brother and other shows before Nick was brought on board. Neither here nor there I suppose but YIKES Nick having to continue to be accessible to fans at this time twice weakly until BIP ends is like medieval times were someone is put in the stocks in the town square for days on end.
When does BIP stop airing?

[MonicaJM2001]

Changing topic a bit
TVParty App - I'm fairly certain Vanessa's PR agent is also rep for the app because Lori Kreb was promoting it on Twitter for Big Brother and other shows before Nick was brought on board. Nether here nor there I suppose but YIKES Nick having to continue to be accessible to fans at this time twice weekly until BIP ends is like medieval times were someone is put in the stocks in the town square for days on end.
When does BIP stop airing?

Ashley and Jared seem to be part of that App now too.........maybe they are going to used to relieve Nick of doing it if it is something he doesn't want to continue...or maybe he wants to continue who knows?

[Jane781]

I think BIP has 3 more weeks. I've been in the app most of the eps so far and there's been lots of questions directed to him about Vanessa. He's ignored all of them. I imagine that will get worse, but I assume he will just continue to ignore it, if he continues the chats.

It does make me wonder if the decision to break up was a more recent ones than some of the articles intimate.

Do you guys think Vanessa is already back in Canada? Do you think she'll finish the Freestyle season or no?

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