Nick Viall & Vanessa Grimaldi - Bachelor 21 - Discussion - #3

ITA a good and solid friendship is vital for people to make it last long term. You have to actually LIKE the person you are with because there will be days you don't feel "in love" due to a variety of real life reasons and a good friendship pulls you through it for other romantic moments to follow.
I didn't really sense this from both of them. But both of them were really into each other on the show, so I was hoping the best for them. It's good they pulled the cord ASAP because why drag it out if it's not working.

I personally don't think friendship was the issue IMO. Vanessa had said multiple times how Nick was her rock when things got to her and listened and I believe she did the same for him. Communication is the base of any good friendship and they had that IMO. I think the PEOPLE article comes closest to the truth that their personalities ultimately proved too different for long-term compatibility. No point being in a relationship when you can't be yourself no matter how much you love the other person IMO.

The saying 'You Never Know Until You Try' comes to mind for me. IMO They knew their differences and went into it knowing that coz of the love they had for each other. IMO This experience will help them to understand themselves better and what they truly need. Even if it didn't work out, IMO their relationship was one of the most honest, real-life relationship I have seen from this show. They could have easily branded themselves as a Bach couple and shilled their way as much as they could in these past few months before breaking up. Instead, they lived a private off-SM life and gave it their best shot. I am proud of them and wish them all the happiness in the world.

All JMO

I don't post here often but I do want to chime in and say my part. I went to the No Better You Event and even back then , I felt the relationship was nearing its end. I am not surprised they have ended like almost all of the other Bachelor couples I was looking at the pictures that I took at the event and came across this one of Nick. Back then I thought it was due to jet lag since he traveled to Montreal the day before the event and due to the 3 hour time change between LA and Montreal. Here's the pic, Nick looks LEGIT MISERABLE. Looks like he'd rather be anywhere else than the event.

It must be very difficult for any of these couples. At the time I'm sure there are genuine feelings of joy and happiness. When things start to crumble, how far do you take it. Who knows what was going through his mind. Very sad actually knowing all he's been through.

I think they were wise to make the decision earlier rather than later.

No one wants to be around unhappy people.

@thisgurlovesbach thanks for posting.

@GuardianAngel no problem. I agree as well, after his gigs on the bachelor he has gone through a lot and its quite sad that this couple is no more. Better to live happy than to please other people.

At what part of the event was that taken @thisgurlovesbach? It is very telling as to where they stood at the time if Nick couldn't do better than that, as I don't see him as one to put on a show. That being said, I did see several pictures and posts from the event that I thought he looked fine in. And the fact that a few of her friends and publicist shouted him out specially when they certainly didn't have to really stood out to me at the time. I guess we will probably never know the real story.

Aw...that's a rather sad pic. He looks defeated. I think Nick has looked so unhappy for quite some time. I feel bad for him.

coolangel wrote:I personally don't think friendship was the issue IMO. Vanessa had said multiple times how Nick was her rock when things got to her and listened and I believe she did the same for him. Communication is the base of any good friendship and they had that IMO. I think the PEOPLE article comes closest to the truth that their personalities ultimately proved too different for long-term compatibility. No point being in a relationship when you can't be yourself no matter how much you love the other person IMO.

*snip*

But isn't a good friendship one where you can be yourself? Communication is important of course but you can talk until the cows come home and still not see eye to eye. And even if you do, for me true friendship is enjoying each other's company even when you're at home doing nothing special, having shared interests, being on the same wavelength and having a similar sense of humour. Having to express everything in words might in fact be a sign that you're not on the same wavelength and never will be. JMO.

Wow....just wow. I remember hoping they were doing well when the fundraiser meet and greet was announced, cause otherwise it would've been really tough to pull off.

In spite of this, I can't imagine how sad they will be when they spend their first night officially apart. This breakup really makes my heart hurt for them - I guess cause they've allowed themselves to be so vulnerable from day one. That scene on the LCD with Vanessa crying on the couch, ugh, just heart wrenching, jmo...

I don't know, maybe I'm a sadist, but I still think that relationships are meant to stretch us, and that stretching is often uncomfortable, even painful.... Especially the longer we've been on our own. I get what everyone's saying about life being too short and go find someone who fits with you, but I hope each doesn't look back on this feeling they'd let their person get away... I wonder if they ever sought counseling? Not that it's my business...

I also had a gut feeling that something was up when Rachel's season of the Bachelorette wrapped up. The contrast between the affection that Rachel and Bryan showed on instagram/ ATFR and Nick and Vanessa was huge. Nick and Vanessa's season was the first season I really watched so I had no experience to judge on previous couples ATFR.

@Jane781 this was taken at the middle of the event around 1-2 pm. But looking back at the event now, I saw that Nick was always walking alone without Vanessa most of the time and they only were together for the happy pictures you saw. Also what did the publicist/friends say to Nick?

At the time of the fundraiser I thought it was weird that Nick was only in Montreal for one day and didn't seem to spend any time with Vanessa's family outside of the event. I guess it was another sign things were off. That pic is really sad.

@mindless Same I found it strange that when Vanessa came to Montreal last week, Nick didn't join her and he only came to the event in July. I do find that pic rather sad and I feel bad for both Nick and Vanessa. I was hoping that it was due to jet lag but I now realize that there was far more than that. I wish them well though.