Ben Higgins - Lauren Bushnell - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #7

Educated guess and Occam's razer: I think filming HEA, the subsequent airing of HEA and the public embarrassment of that called off wedding took a major toll on them. I agree, for a while I was positive they were DOA. It seems they are really "tryin" and have put in some hard work and appear to be getting back on track. Good for them! That makes me proud to be a fan, regardless what happens from here. 

The last interview we have of them, they both said they were really happy and while they still didn't have a date, they really felt like they were getting to a good place and really understanding each other, that maybe they felt good about starting wedding plans again. This was a couple weeks ago around Nick's finale. We have to remember that Ben cancelled the original wedding 7 months ago, in September, and a lot has happened between then and now. Life moves on. We just, THANKFULLY, aren't seeing it broadcasted on Freeform anymore. 

I don't blame Ben for stalling the wedding. I think it was cruel to do it on TV. I think agreeing to do the show to begin with was idiotic and I hope they avoid stuff like that from here on out. I'm encouraged to learn they turned down Season 2. Hopefully they learned their lesson. People make mistakes. I still think at the core, they are both decent/good people, they are trying ... and I wish them well no matter what happens.

Oh, and personally I never felt like RS had real sources. I'm basing this on his conversation with JJ on his podcast. Steve doesn't know crap. He was basing it on here-say and social media. IMO.

Mommyof2 wrote:

suspiciousmind wrote:I guess reality steve's sources were wrong about them and their relationship huh? Or maybe they weren't wrong and they are just pretending? I'm a bit confused about them.....but I do think Ben was really smart about putting the wedding off. It was too soon and if he wasn't ready the worst thing he could've done was get married too soon.  IMO

Imho, they should know by now if marriage is on the horizon.  I get the feeling that Ben is having cold feet because Lauren has changed since the show ended.  She seems self-absorbed.  Selfies really are a curse in our society.  Anyway, I believe he is giving it more time to see if they can work through their differences.  So, kudos to them, but I do not see them ever walking down the aisle together.  (Where is my hiding chair emoji?)  

I was just about to post and ask if I was the only one who doesn't see this relationship going anywhere! I may be wrong, but I don't see Lauren wanting to stay in Denver compared to living in LA. I see her more interested in all the latest trend of blogging, instagramming, shilling, girls' trips and extending her 15 minutes of "fame". It would drive me CRAZY to be with somebody who was constantly posing with all those silly selfie faces - it's so immature and very much overdone these days. Regarding Ben, if he is truly insecure, that would be a definite turnoff for me. I would be surprised if they settled down to a "normal" middle class lifestyle with a family. All just my own opinion of course!

I think they both like the limelight and opportunities and to me they both seem much much happier in LA than they do in Denver. Nothing wrong with that as long as they are both on the same page and happy where they are that's what matters most, IMO.

I've always gotten the vibe that they both love the spotlight, but two very different types of spotlight.

I think Lauren loves the finer things in life, the LA lifestyle and enjoys traveling and promoting it, she loves doing photoshoots, etc. and there's nothing wrong with that and I think that's the type of spot light she wants. I think Ben likes being in Denver, however, I think he loved filming HEA (until it made Lauren miserable thus making him miserable). I also think he loves doing interviews. All three reality shows painted him in a good light and I think he loves being told how awesome he is.

It's two very different types of spotlight, so they want different things. It should be interesting to see where they go from here. All JMO

In this interview, Ben noted that Lauren would love to move to LA, their home is currently Denver, but they'll see what the future holds. They seem to be back on track, which is refreshing. I think this last month has been really calming for them, and has put a lot into perspective IMO.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.etonline.com/news/213617_lauren_bushnell_celebrates_ben_higgins_birthday_with_sweet_post_i_m_so_thankful_for_this_life_together/ampdoc.html

I see it as the same spotlight - since it's both in the public - so don't see it as them wanting different things since both those things are in the public eye.

I think Lauren's stuff is just typical things that a female gets to do more than males (photoshoots, shilling, clothes, etc are more of a female demographic anyway for SM) and Ben prefers the spotlight for TV, interviews, heck he even looks happy with the paparazzi asking him questions, IMO, and driving the twins around in LA. Either way, they both look happier when they are in LA and the spotlight is on them IMO.

Overall I think they're both very vanilla and very similar and any differences aren't that big IMO when it comes down to it.

Ash2214 wrote:I've always gotten the vibe that they both love the spotlight, but two very different types of spotlight.

I think Lauren loves the finer things in life, the LA lifestyle and enjoys traveling and promoting it, she loves doing photoshoots, etc. and there's nothing wrong with that and I think that's the type of spot light she wants. I think Ben likes being in Denver, however, I think he loved filming HEA (until it made Lauren miserable thus making him miserable). I also think he loves doing interviews. All three reality shows painted him in a good light and I think he loves being told how awesome he is.

It's two very different types of spotlight, so they want different things. It should be interesting to see where they go from here. All JMO

I see this, too. I can not imagine what a grueling interference in life a tv show would be. Whereas, you do a photoshoot and it's over a lot quicker, plus hair, makeup and clothes are fun especially if you get some freebies.

Just because both of their wants are in the spotlight doesn't mean they're the same thing. 

I think Lauren would love to move back to LA, but wasn't into doing HEA. She just loves the girly stuff. Who wouldn't? I think Ben loves Denver, but he was the one who had to convince Lauren to do HEA. I think Lauren is actually more private in terms of sharing their relationship. Ben isn't IMO. I've seen him look his happiest in interviews and talking to paparazzi whereas Lauren doesn't look thrilled in interviews or dealing with the paparazzi and so forth. That's just my opinion.

If one of them wants to move back to LA where she can do photoshoots, get invited to events, etc. but the other would prefer to stay in Denver and perhaps display their relationship in a way that makes the other person feel uncomfortable that is certainly different. IMO

I did not watch HEA. It was enough for me to live vicariously through the postings here. Thank you to everyone who sacrificed brain cells.
What will always stand out in my mind is the masturbatory/fertility episode. Huge EMBARRASSMENT. Huge. TMI on crack.
IMO you can forget a selfie. Forget a shilling. Forget an awful lot. That episode, and I didn't even see it, well, it's not forgettable IMO.
A lot went down on doing that reality show. I think a lot needs to be repaired in order to work past it. Producer ploys or not, it was not constructive to their relationship.

^^ That was the worst episode EVER! I was so embarrased for Ben and the whole episode made me cringe. I bet the producers were behind the scenes laughing their butts off!

Ben's tweet for an ad for water today. To me Ben and Lauren are pretty much the same although they may seemingly go about it differently I think they have the same like for the spotlight and the perks that come with it.

Have you noticed/tried @IcelandicWater? It's good! Small company Im guessing but awesome water!

— Benjamin Higgins (@benhiggi) April 1, 2017

and this response  

@benhiggi @IcelandicWater It's water, Ben.

I'm surprised they are actually "hosts" of this Disney wedding special. They are way too boring to be hosts of anything, IMO. HEA showed me just how vanilla both really are.