Andi Dorfman - The Bachelorette 10 - Discussion - #6

Yep. She truly borders on sociopathic.
imo

Yeah on her book she mentioned #26 naked photos that was taken on her phone that she printed at local cvs #26 returned it to her .

According to her book she quoted on burning the memories of #26. "The way I see it, nobody said you had to go through this break up taking the high road the entire time. That's impossible. Sometimes you just have to get pissed and burn some poop in order to feel better. "  .  No taking the high road on Andi's world after break up . Oh andi just shut the hell up !

I asked a co-worker who is 30 and single about #25's "Would you rather F#ck or make Love?" question.  She found nothing strange in that being said and would take it as a good sign.  As she put it, a Hook-up is a Hook-up and you know what sex means in that context, but if you've been dating for 3 or 4 dates, then it's a good thing to make sure both people are getting what they want from sex.  In her word, just "f#cking" means both people are having a good time but they're each responsible for making sure they get what they want.  Conversely, "Making Love" means that each partner's focus is on satisfying the other.  

Shows you just how much of a married woman I am - I'd have never delineated the two that way!  Either way, my co-worker doesn't think that any of her friends would find the question off putting.

eirekay wrote:I asked a co-worker who is 30 and single about #25's "Would you rather F#ck or make Love?" question.  She found nothing strange in that being said and would take it as a good sign.  As she put it, a Hook-up is a Hook-up and you know what sex means in that context, but if you've been dating for 3 or 4 dates, then it's a good thing to make sure both people are getting what they want from sex.  In her word, just "f#cking" means both people are having a good time but they're each responsible for making sure they get what they want.  Conversely, "Making Love" means that each partner's focus is on satisfying the other.  

Shows you just how much of a married woman I am - I'd have never delineated the two that way!  Either way, my co-worker doesn't think that any of her friends would find the question off putting.

That makes sense to me, although the world certainly wasn't like that back when I dated, either.

People on this show come from all over the country and norms about how to act on dates are going to vary. I think participants need to roll with it and not jump quickly to negative conclusions. Some behaviors are just narcissistic (JP), but others seem like an attempt to do whatever the individual understands to be "the right thing" (NV).

It's so analytical, let's decide, should we make love or F**k. 
When your there let nature take its course. IMO 

Nick lets f*** = lets just hook up. His let make love means we are going into a relationship. That is why he asked why did you make love to me = we did not just have sex it was more.

Gotcha Reason, I think?

That's how I see it and saw it 2 yrs ago. And I believe the female counterpart saw it that way also even though.

Reason, that makes total sense to me. I'd imagine that question was also a way for Nick to ask, "Is this relationship for real--like, do you actually love me even though you aren't supposed to say--or are you just in this with me for a night of fun?" Sounds like a reasonable question to me, and I'm way past their age group. My generation probably wouldn't have used the same wording, but a similar question would not have been unheard of.

I thought Nick's way of wording the question was lighthearted, cute, and funny. Andi thought it was weird and awkward, but she doesn't seem to be a very lighthearted person IMO.

I finished the book this morning. I would get to a point where I thought that Andi was self depreciating, trying to laugh at herself, thinking this isn't so bad, and then it would change. She started talking about vengence, about how she was slowly getting over Josh but then she met him for lunch and slept with him without connecting the dots. How did she get from being so "empowered" to that? And then she goes back to hating him. She wrote about having to consolidate clothes from shopping into one or two bags, putting clothes on from her shopping bags before she came in the house...there was just something missing...why...how? Does she just go through money? she seemed pretty deceptive. There is no context, no self disclosure to these snippets of slamming Josh. And when she bashed Josh because he was upset that she didn't thank him for breakfast...it made me see entitlement and think that maybe Andi doesn't appreciate anyone or anything. Even when she wrote he said that he thought her job was dangerous, I'm sure he didn't tell her not to be a lawyer but not to work on gangs anymore. there were so many omissions that it was obvious there is another side to this story. It was such a character assassination of Josh. It totally shames him. It's really sad to me. I wonder if he can take legal action because this surely will affect his life. And for what? It reminds me of a five year old pointing at a sibling and only telling their own very biased version of a story.

So there was not much about Nick in it just Josh bashing?