The Bachelor 20 - Ben Higgins - ATFR - *Sleuthing - Spoilers* #3

Of course JoJo and Chad have nothing to do with Ben and Lauren at this point. JoJo's whole season will have very little, if anything to do with them. Ben and Lauren's life moving forward will also have very little to do with Jo.

**edited** This year is tame by normal standard, but sometimes the fan wars can get intense. For example, I was a huge Jef/Emily fan, but I liked Arie too. Well, the over the top Arie fans who did everything to tear down JEM on repeat, made me hate Arie. Was it fair? Of course not. But it was a biproduct of trying to defend JEM so much against the rabid Arie fan-base that was pretty OTT at times.

Anyway, I like Lauren and Ben a lot. Like a lot. I'm hopeful for them, and I think they seem VERY promising to be a lasting couple. I do question some of Jo's intentions going into her season, but I still think she has what it takes to be a pretty good lead. Kaitlyn was never someone I thought would leave this show with a life partner. There were rumors during her filming she was still into her ex too- some firefighter guy if I'm remembering and rumors saying she asked him to wait for her. She seemed to want the fame, and make a joke about the whole experience. Well- she left with Shawn, and they seem perfect for each other and solid as crap, so you never know.

Ash2214 wrote:

ForeverLove wrote:

Geez, Jojo really has some winner role models!

Considering Ben Patton is the CEO of a hospital, does a ton of charity work and has even traveled to countries like Africa to volunteer with children that are in desperate need of help, such as needing hearing aides so that they can hear, well yeah, I'd call him a great role model.

Jojo does indeed have some winner role models!  Her father is a gastroenterologist (doctor ) and her mother has a PhD from Vanderbilt and is a nurse-practitioner. Jojo's sister is a registered nurse at a children's hospital and her brother is a resident physician. Then there is brother Ben. I have to chuckle when a "Reality Star" label is affixed to him, as if that few months filming a show defined him for life. Puh-leez!  

Jojo and perfect Ben do have a lot in common, so it's not surprising they would bond on the show. Both are college educated, have real-world careers and are part of loving, close-knit families that are active in charitable endeavors. Both had a reality tv experience - even though Jojo's was from a distance. Both had a difficult break-up from a long term relationship. Both were surprised they could develop real feelings / bubble love on this show. Now both are moving on with their lives and no doubt wish each other the very best. IMHO.

Ash2214 wrote:

ForeverLove wrote:

Lucas15 wrote:

Nor IMO JoJo's half brother Ben Patton. There's actually an archived forum that covers Ready For Love here and some of the things there make for an interesting read. I think Ben himself did a lot of acting on that show.

Geez, Jojo really has some winner role models!

Considering Ben Patton is the CEO of a hospital, does a ton of charity work and has even traveled to countries like Africa to volunteer with children that are in desperate need of help, such as needing hearing aides so that they can hear, well yeah, I'd call him a great role model.

stuckinsc wrote:

Ash2214 wrote:

Lucas15 wrote:

On the basis of those things that Ben has done I would agree. However on the basis of Ben's involvement in Reality TV and romantic relationships - maybe not so much.
JMHO

I guess I just prefer to judge someone on how they are in real life versus on a reality television show. What's the difference between Ben Patton and any other male lead from this show? He did what he was supposed to do. He was a lead on a show that didn't last very long, but he picked someone, tried to make it work, and it didn't. He's now been in a serious relationship with someone for over a year it looks like.

Being on a reality television show doesn't take away from the fact that he's done a whole lot of good for people. That's a role model and someone I would want in my corner.

Ben Patton is just like any other lead from this show. Yet unlike most from bachelor nation in the years since his show he moved away from constantly seeking the spotlight. Now he works and has a serious career, does sincere charity work and found a good relationship. Most of MF's people would be lucky to move on this well.

**edited**

Haha stuck this is why I like you, because you say what's on my mind.
This happens every season. Many times the leads, the f1 2 3 4 all move on but some fans somehow are still trapped inside the bubble and even try to tear down non f1s. I am not surprised because it's just human nature. I tend to root for underdogs but that also saves me from heartbreak when the couple split.
Anyway, I am not too invested in the current couple and can't wait for the next season. Hopefully this time I will like the most popular contestant so no need to defend him. Wish me luck!

stuckinsc wrote:

Ash2214 wrote:

Lucas15 wrote:

On the basis of those things that Ben has done I would agree. However on the basis of Ben's involvement in Reality TV and romantic relationships - maybe not so much.
JMHO

I guess I just prefer to judge someone on how they are in real life versus on a reality television show. What's the difference between Ben Patton and any other male lead from this show? He did what he was supposed to do. He was a lead on a show that didn't last very long, but he picked someone, tried to make it work, and it didn't. He's now been in a serious relationship with someone for over a year it looks like.

Being on a reality television show doesn't take away from the fact that he's done a whole lot of good for people. That's a role model and someone I would want in my corner.

Ben Patton is just like any other lead from this show. Yet unlike most from bachelor nation in the years since his show he moved away from constantly seeking the spotlight. Now he works and has a serious career, does sincere charity work and found a good relationship. Most of MF's people would be lucky to move on this well.

**edited**

That's my girl Stuck! My inner B***h has me dreaming of chimpmucks 

^^ Good Luck SD.

And I hope after many seasons we are on the same team again. I normally gravitate towards the F3/F4 for each season   with the exception of 1 or 2 seasons.

Yeah, that's just it. In real life, Ben/JoJo/Lauren... All of these "characters" are actually people. Like well rounded, fully flushed out people. Not all bad, not all good. Humans with positive attributes and shortcomings alike. The contestants all know this- because they actually KNOW each other, and therefore move on from the Bachelor mess MUCH more easily than fans. We see 2 dimensional characters, and maybe that's why the fan wars sometimes last so much longer for us than for the actual participants. It's all rather silly. I hope nothing but the best for Ben and Lauren, and I hope JoJo provides an entertaining season and gets whatever her little heart desires out of the experience. Whether that's fame, or a hot flame, or both.

For me, I've only really cared about 3 or 4 couples in all 15 years this show has been on the air (and I've seen most of the seasons). BenLo is one of the "elite" couples I got invested in. I actually kind of prefer not to care- caring too much gets exhausting. If I don't get invested in the final couple (the norm), I tend to be meh about season in general. The one exception was Nick V. Who I did love in the F2 position both times. Haha. But I also didn't love him enough to get involved in fan wars or ripping down Josh/Andi or Kaitlyn/Shawn. I barely paid attention to ether, kind of shrugged my shoulders when Andi and Josh broke up, and I am now genuinely hopeful and happy for Kaitlyn/Shawn.

Lucas15 wrote:

Ash2214 wrote:Considering Ben Patton is the CEO of a hospital, does a ton of charity work and has even traveled to countries like Africa to volunteer with children that are in desperate need of help, such as needing hearing aides so that they can hear, well yeah, I'd call him a great role model.

On the basis of those things that Ben has done I would agree. However on the basis of Ben's involvement in Reality TV and romantic relationships - maybe not so much.
JMHO

Sorry I didn't watch Ben P on TV. What did he do? Did he say ILYs to multiple women a la Ben H? Or did he sleep with multiple women ala Too-Many-Leads-to-Name?

sosleepy wrote:Yeah, that's just it. In real life, Ben/JoJo/Lauren... All of these "characters" are actually people. Like well rounded, fully flushed out people. Not all bad, not all good. Humans with positive attributes and shortcomings alike. The contestants all know this- because they actually KNOW each other, and therefore move on from the Bachelor mess MUCH more easily than fans. We see 2 dimensional characters, and maybe that's why the fan wars sometimes last so much longer for us than for the actual participants. It's all rather silly. I hope nothing but the best for Ben and Lauren, and I hope JoJo provides an entertaining season and gets whatever her little heart desires out of the experience. Whether that's fame, or a hot flame, or both.

For me, I've only really cared about 3 or 4 couples in all 15 years this show has been on the air (and I've seen most of the seasons). BenLo is one of the "elite" couples I got invested in. I actually kind of prefer not to care- caring too much gets exhausting. If I don't get invested in the final couple (the norm), I tend to be meh about season in general. The one exception was Nick V. Who I did love in the F2 position both times. Haha. But I also didn't love him enough to get involved in fan wars or ripping down Josh/Andi or Kaitlyn/Shawn. I barely paid attention to ether, kind of shrugged my shoulders when Andi and Josh broke up, and I am now genuinely hopeful and happy for Kaitlyn/Shawn.

Wonderful post and beautifully said.

Interesting! I didn't realize JoJo came from such an accomplished family. Or that brother Ben had a solid, non TV job.

It does make her HTD even more of a head scratcher though .

sdmom wrote:

Lucas15 wrote:

Ash2214 wrote:Considering Ben Patton is the CEO of a hospital, does a ton of charity work and has even traveled to countries like Africa to volunteer with children that are in desperate need of help, such as needing hearing aides so that they can hear, well yeah, I'd call him a great role model.

On the basis of those things that Ben has done I would agree. However on the basis of Ben's involvement in Reality TV and romantic relationships - maybe not so much.
JMHO

Sorry I didn't watch Ben P on TV. What did he do? Did he say ILYs to multiple women a la Ben H? Or did he sleep with multiple women ala Too-Many-Leads-to-Name?

He basically appeared on a similar dating show (which tracked multiple leads simulataneously) and got engaged to a girl at the end. That didn't last long and they broke up.
So he's basically no different from any other lead including Ben H. Probably why he should have gone easier on him during HTs.

Why are we discussing JoJo and her brother in the Ben Higgins thread?