Lauren Bushnell - Bachelor 20 - *Sleuthing - Spoilers* - #4

veg_out wrote:During Lauren and Ben's first date, we heard them talk about the simple life and the normalcy of their day. We hear Lauren tell Ben that she's looking for someone like her dad.

On their second date, Ben takes Lauren on a normal date doing simple things (except for the Pacers) around his hometown. We hear Lauren comment that Ben will be an amazing dad.

From an edit standpoint, they are showing us that Ben is the person that Lauren is looking for and Lauren is the person that Ben wants to know him, really know him.

However, Ben and Lauren, right now, have no conflict. They are shown as overcoming obstacles and happy as clams in love. JoJo is the one with rising conflict. Ben still has concerns that she's not where he is nor where she needs to be to make him comfortable about the end of the show. Next week throws several wrenches into their relationship.

If I were to speculate, I am wondering if Lauren resolves Ben's conflict simply by being a port in a storm. She, through her continuous words of affirmation to him (You make me so happy, I missed you so much), makes him feel lovable when all the other women on this season leave him with some doubts. She's the one that he trusts with his heart. For Lauren, Ben resolves her conflict, possibly, if he proves to her that he cherishes her heart.

You have a very interesting point and I have never actually considered that thought until now.
Anyway, because of what you pointed out I realized that maybe people are getting it wrong. The general feeling is, Jojo and Ben has this kind of friendship where Jojo makes Ben feel comfortable to be himself. Well that's what Ben says ("She's the person who may actually know me the best and accepts me for who I am" something like that). That may be true and that's the reason some people think Jojo will be the better choice. BUT IN ACTUALITY, Jojo isn't really giving Ben any assurance that she'll really stick around. She's constantly being afraid and holding out.

Compared to what Lauren is to Ben. Lauren has been consistent that even if she says it's hard to feel confident and to trust what she feels because of The Bachelor process and the reality that there are other women, she still jumps right in. She reciprocates Ben's feelings. Makes him feel good and look all heart eye emoji ;). She lets him know that "I am here IN THIS JOURNEY WITH YOU and you can trust that I'll go through this process with you". And that's what people are missing. Ben and Lauren goes with the flow of their feelings and this will be their solid foundation. Together, they jumped right into it (no matter how terrified they are with their feelings for each other). Ben can't even explain it. He tries but couldn't. And that must be real love.

veg_out wrote:During Lauren and Ben's first date, we heard them talk about the simple life and the normalcy of their day. We hear Lauren tell Ben that she's looking for someone like her dad.

On their second date, Ben takes Lauren on a normal date doing simple things (except for the Pacers) around his hometown. We hear Lauren comment that Ben will be an amazing dad.

From an edit standpoint, they are showing us that Ben is the person that Lauren is looking for and Lauren is the person that Ben wants to know him, really know him.

However, Ben and Lauren, right now, have no conflict. They are shown as overcoming obstacles and happy as clams in love. JoJo is the one with rising conflict. Ben still has concerns that she's not where he is nor where she needs to be to make him comfortable about the end of the show. Next week throws several wrenches into their relationship.

If I were to speculate, I am wondering if Lauren resolves Ben's conflict simply by being a port in a storm. She, through her continuous words of affirmation to him (You make me so happy, I missed you so much), makes him feel lovable when all the other women on this season leave him with some doubts. She's the one that he trusts with his heart. For Lauren, Ben resolves her conflict, possibly, if he proves to her that he cherishes her heart.

This made my day ! I was concern after reading those article/rumor about Ben regrets his decision for choosing Lauren and also the promo for finale. I supposed not to believe this. Thanks veg!

Anyone finds it interesting that Lauren's not overly promoting the show especially on IG. In her own subtle ways I do feel like she trying to control herself. Just a thought!

veg_out wrote:During Lauren and Ben's first date, we heard them talk about the simple life and the normalcy of their day. We hear Lauren tell Ben that she's looking for someone like her dad.

On their second date, Ben takes Lauren on a normal date doing simple things (except for the Pacers) around his hometown. We hear Lauren comment that Ben will be an amazing dad.

From an edit standpoint, they are showing us that Ben is the person that Lauren is looking for and Lauren is the person that Ben wants to know him, really know him.

However, Ben and Lauren, right now, have no conflict. They are shown as overcoming obstacles and happy as clams in love. JoJo is the one with rising conflict. Ben still has concerns that she's not where he is nor where she needs to be to make him comfortable about the end of the show. Next week throws several wrenches into their relationship.

If I were to speculate, I am wondering if Lauren resolves Ben's conflict simply by being a port in a storm. She, through her continuous words of affirmation to him (You make me so happy, I missed you so much), makes him feel lovable when all the other women on this season leave him with some doubts. She's the one that he trusts with his heart. For Lauren, Ben resolves her conflict, possibly, if he proves to her that he cherishes her heart.

I love this post, because part of me is worried that everything seems a bit too "in your face" right now - I mean, we even have all the other girls telling us again and again about the obvious connection that Ben and Lauren share. With this show, too much of a good thing can turn out to be a negative sign. But maybe, just maybe, they're giving us a real love story for their 20th anniversary season

I guess I shouldn't hold my breath though, I'm sure they have some "drama" planned for the FRC/ATFR episodes

Idlemess wrote:Anyone finds it interesting that Lauren's not overly promoting the show especially on IG. In her own subtle ways I do feel like she trying to control herself. Just a thought!

I think she always flies under the radar. She's not a here look at me kind of person. I'm just curious who's in the pic with her on her Twitter profile page. Looks like the corner of Ben's eye like she's trying to be subtle and sly again.

ForeverLove wrote:

Idlemess wrote:Anyone finds it interesting that Lauren's not overly promoting the show especially on IG. In her own subtle ways I do feel like she trying to control herself. Just a thought!

I think she always flies under the radar. She's not a here look at me kind of person. I'm just curious who's in the pic with her on her Twitter profile page. Looks like the corner of Ben's eye like she's trying to be subtle and sly again.

That is a friend of hers/Molly's ..per Twitter .. "Mrs Hayward I would totally date your son if he were straight"

jupi wrote:

I love this post, because part of me is worried that everything seems a bit too "in your face" right now - I mean, we even have all the other girls telling us again and again about the obvious connection that Ben and Lauren share. With this show, too much of a good thing can turn out to be a negative sign. But maybe, just maybe, they're giving us a real love story for their 20th anniversary season

I guess I shouldn't hold my breath though, I'm sure they have some "drama" planned for the FRC/ATFR episodes

Can you share link an image of your avi. I need to save that precious picture on my phone

dyra wrote:
Can you share link an image of your avi. I need to save that precious picture on my phone

Sure, I just screencapped it for you



This might just be my favorite moment of their whole date. The hearteyes from Ben say it all IMO

jupi wrote:

dyra wrote:
Can you share link an image of your avi. I need to save that precious picture on my phone

Sure, I just screencapped it for you



This might just be my favorite moment of their whole date. The hearteyes from Ben say it all IMO

Thanks so much ! It's my fav too

If I didn't know what I know, I'd think it's too obvious too but I don't have any doubt.

At this point, I'm just counting down till March 14th

Ah, Diana, I wish I could be inside your head now

veg_out wrote:Probably my fave part from last night: The two of them independently having 1:1 time with little kids:

As I watched Ben take that crying boy under his wing to comfort him I kept thinking "wouldn't it be so sweet if Lauren had done the same thing". And lo and behold she did - in this SC - we just never got to see the detail behind that.

veg_out wrote:During Lauren and Ben's first date, we heard them talk about the simple life and the normalcy of their day. We hear Lauren tell Ben that she's looking for someone like her dad.

On their second date, Ben takes Lauren on a normal date doing simple things (except for the Pacers) around his hometown. We hear Lauren comment that Ben will be an amazing dad.

From an edit standpoint, they are showing us that Ben is the person that Lauren is looking for and Lauren is the person that Ben wants to know him, really know him.

However, Ben and Lauren, right now, have no conflict. They are shown as overcoming obstacles and happy as clams in love. JoJo is the one with rising conflict. Ben still has concerns that she's not where he is nor where she needs to be to make him comfortable about the end of the show. Next week throws several wrenches into their relationship.

If I were to speculate, I am wondering if Lauren resolves Ben's conflict simply by being a port in a storm. She, through her continuous words of affirmation to him (You make me so happy, I missed you so much), makes him feel lovable when all the other women on this season leave him with some doubts. She's the one that he trusts with his heart. For Lauren, Ben resolves her conflict, possibly, if he proves to her that he cherishes her heart.

I love this post. While JoJo has been portrayed by the show hype as the comfortable port in the storm, she really isn't - she's the one with doubts and walls up that have to be torn down by Ben. How is that a comfortable port in a storm? IMO it isn't.

IMO Lauren resolves Ben's obstacle by being the one who reciprocates his feelings and allows him to unleash the magnetic attraction he has for her without fear of his blind side, and Ben resolves Lauren's obstacle of being one of 3 remaining girls and uncertain she will be his choice at the end (introduced on her HTD by her family). Each must take a leap of faith in the other to get to the end because those obstacles won't be resolvable until the FRC. But each holds in their hands the resolution of the final obstacle for them to be together.