The Bachelor 20 - Ben Higgins - Premier - Episode 1 - Discussion - *Sleuthing - Spoilers*

Yeah because listening to Kaitlyn and taking her advice is a good idea. *rollseyes*

Returnee contestants always reek of a special level of desperation on this show. You get one shot at being a contestant unless you want to come back to BIP where it's understood that the show is just a quick way to make money and take a vacation. And even then you can go on once before you look extra desperate. All JMO as always.

I think they all cross the "desperate" line when they go on this show in the first place.
No exceptions.

And then they cross the pathetic line when they go on as a contestant the second time.

I disagree that they all come off desperate. People have lots of reasons for doing the show the first time - free travel, an adventure, fun story to tell people, bored in normal life, opportunities, etc. I've never seen people like Sharleen, Roberto, Chris L, JP, Renee, Chris S, Emily o etc. as desperate. I never felt any of here people were looking for fame and attention. I think they just did it for fun and possibilities. When you keep coming back and can't let go? That's when the desperation begins.

bluwavz wrote:And then they cross the pathetic line when they go on as a contestant the second time.

As lead as well, imo.
Because by then they have lots and lots of women/men interested in them and don't need to go on but choose to go on TV for it.
But being lead seems to exempt them from this perspective since they are doing it for $$$$.
Makes zero sense to me.

nothatgirl wrote:I disagree that they all come off desperate. People have lots of reasons for doing the show the first time - free travel, an adventure, fun story to tell people, bored in normal life, opportunities, etc. I've never seen people like Sharleen, Roberto, Chris L, JP, Renee, Chris S, Emily o etc. as desperate. I never felt any of here people were looking for fame and attention. I think they just did it for fun and possibilities. When you keep coming back and can't let go? That's when the desperation begins.

They can do all that on Survivor, Amazing Race, and any other show that has travel, adventure, fun story, etc, etc.
Choosing to go on TB/Bette show is not the best place to go for those things, imo, especially the last few seasons when it comes to travel. Not to mention, they don't get paid at all and quit their jobs to do so and be one of many competing for one lead.

Going back as the lead isn't the same as going back as a contestant again, I wouldn't call it pathetic/desperate, IMO. I mean, you're getting paid $100,000 and you're in control of the situation, it's not like you're back competing for one person again.

AmyB wrote:Going back as the lead isn't the same as going back as a contestant again, I wouldn't call it pathetic/desperate, IMO. I mean, you're getting paid $100,000 and you're in control of the situation, it's not like you're back competing for one person again.

I know that it isn't a popular opinion but it is just the same, imo, save for getting paid to do so and lots of $$$.
And this time getting paid to have other people compete for them.
It's definitely not for love, no matter what the leads say and even if they find it, which to me, says their motives are even more about just $$$.

None of this makes me dislike contestants or leads based on this because I like them for reasons other than this.

And that's the thing, to me, it's all the same...
It is a TV show that these people all have one thing in common - they want to be on TV.

I'd much rather be the lead than be a contestant again any day. I'd rather have my pick out of 25-30 guys than setting myself up for rejection again pursuing another idiot they're trying to pass off as some big catch. There's less chance for ending up alone as the lead unless you choose to be. I'd also rather be paid and have a shot at DWTS even if the female leads usually don't get it.

DebutAlbum wrote:I think Becca's interest in Ben was genuine. From what I was told by people who would know, he was the only one she would've went back on for. If it were anyone else, she wouldn't have returned. In fact, she turned down BIP because Ben wasn't on it. She was very interested in him for a while.

I agree with all of this from what I understand.
Editing myself: Let me say as a HUGE fan of TAR and OMG--Survivor, this is not TB stint. This is hard effing work and perhaps the time of your life, IMOAA. They should only be so lucky to be a CBS crossover.

bluwavz wrote:I'd much rather be the lead than be a contestant again any day. I'd rather have my pick out of 25-30 guys than setting myself up for rejection again pursuing another idiot they're trying to pass off as some big catch. There's less chance for ending up alone as the lead unless you choose to be. I'd also rather be paid and have a shot at DWTS even if the female leads usually don't get it.

Of course most would. They get paid.
Doesn't make it any better though to me.
Certainly not making out with multiple people, some sleeping with many of them and leading people on just because they're getting paid.
And that's what I find funny. At least contestants are not making out with all these people for money.
But the lead always gets a pass compared to contestants.
And it has little to do with the individual because if Ben was a returnee he would be criticized way more than as lead I'm sure.

AllAboutLove wrote:

AmyB wrote:Going back as the lead isn't the same as going back as a contestant again, I wouldn't call it pathetic/desperate, IMO. I mean, you're getting paid $100,000 and you're in control of the situation, it's not like you're back competing for one person again.

I know that it isn't a popular opinion but it is just the same, imo, save for getting paid to do so and lots of $$$.
And this time getting paid to have other people compete for them.
It's definitely not for love, no matter what the leads say and even if they find it, which to me, says their motives are even more about just $$$.

None of this makes me dislike contestants or leads based on this because I like them for reasons other than this.

And that's the thing, to me, it's all the same...
It is a TV show that these people all have one thing in common - they want to be on TV.

Doing this show for money, not love, just makes the person even more sensible and intelligent in my mind. You're talking about enough money for a down payment for doing nothing but making out with hot women and traveling the world. Um, if that's pathetic, sign me up (I'll take hot men, instead).  

I genuinely don't think every lead and contestant is the same. It's usually a combination of different things, but primary motivations are different for different people. There's a reason that no one here ever calls Sharleen pathetic or fame-hungry. Why? Because she went back to her old career, never went on TV again, and didn't date as many Bach alum as she could. And, there are a lot of people like her in this franchise! Not everyone is a Chris B, obsessed with fame and attention. Not everyone is pathetic. Some people, like JP/Ashley or Jason/Molly, have used the money wisely and gone back to their normal, boring lives. To put everyone on the same level as Becca is just crazy to me. JMO.