Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
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Just sharing because I really like this explanation
Love, Explained By Judy Dutton
Q: In a nutshell, why do we fall in love?
Dr. Fisher: I’ve come to think that romantic love is one of three basic brain systems that evolved for reproduction. Each evolved for a reason: The sex drive evolved to get you out there looking for partners. Romantic love evolved to enable you to focus your energy on just one person at a time, conserving time and energy. And attachment, the feeling of security you can feel with a long-term partner, evolved to help you stay together long enough to raise kids.
Q: Why does being in love feel so good?
Dr. Fisher: The main chemical involved is dopamine, which produces feelings of euphoria, energy, sleeplessness, and focused attention on your beloved.
Q: Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Dr. Fisher: Yes. It probably happens to men more than women because men are more visual, but I think we can all remember times when we felt an instant attraction to someone we barely knew. It has a practical purpose: In the animal kingdom you can’t spend three months discussing your résumé; you need to feel instant sparks to start the breeding process.
Q: Is falling in love all about timing?
Dr. Fisher: Timing is important. The perfect partner can sit right next to you at a party, and you might not notice him or her if you’re too busy at work, enmeshed in another relationship, or otherwise preoccupied. But if you’ve just moved to a new city, recovered from an unsatisfying love affair, begun to make enough money to raise a family, are suffering through a difficult experience, or have a good deal of spare time, you are ripe to fall in love.
Q: Is there anything we can do to make someone fall for us (or make ourselves fall for someone)?
Dr. Fisher: Do new things together. Novelty and excitement all drive up the activity of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain. These neurotransmitters are associated with energy, elation, focused attention and motivation—central traits of romantic love.
Q: Is there anything you can do to make yourself stop loving someone?
Dr. Fisher: Some people, especially women, tend to talk about a failed relationship so much that they re-traumatize themselves. Instead, get rid of your ex’s cards and letters. Don’t call or write. Get some sunshine and exercise, because both can change brain chemistry.
Q: What’s the difference between love and lust?
Dr. Fisher: Lust generally dissipates after having sex and returns hours or days later. You can feel it for several people at the same time and not necessarily feel jealous. But when you’re in love, you are very possessive. And romantic feelings don’t dissipate after having sex; in fact, they can intensify.
Q: Does having sex make people fall in love?
Dr. Fisher: Having sex can trigger love—probably because after orgasm, there’s a peak in dopamine activity. So watch out if you casually bed down with someone—you might unintentionally fall for them.
Q: How important a role does chemistry play in love?
Dr. Fisher: I believe that when the chemistry of one personality meshes well with the chemistry of another, it will continually combust throughout the relationship—keeping both partners together and happy during dry spells when feelings of romance are low.
Q: How do men and women experience love differently?
Dr. Fisher: Men fall in love faster than women do. Women take longer because they have to create a “memory trail” of their mate’s behaviors. She has to remember what he promised, what he’s done for the partnership, and what he failed to do.
Q: What do men look for in a mate?
Dr. Fisher: Men are more likely to choose women who display signs of youth and beauty—the first time that they marry, men around the world tend to marry women who are three years younger than themselves. Men are also attracted to women who “need” them. Men want to be helpful.
Q: Can someone truly love more than one person?
Dr. Fisher: No. I think you can feel lust for more than one person, and feelings of attachment for more than one person. But not love. As the Indian aphorism goes, “The lane of love is narrow; there is room for only one.
Excerpt from:
http://www.chemistry.com/datingadvice/LoveExplained
Q: In a nutshell, why do we fall in love?
Dr. Fisher: I’ve come to think that romantic love is one of three basic brain systems that evolved for reproduction. Each evolved for a reason: The sex drive evolved to get you out there looking for partners. Romantic love evolved to enable you to focus your energy on just one person at a time, conserving time and energy. And attachment, the feeling of security you can feel with a long-term partner, evolved to help you stay together long enough to raise kids.
Q: Why does being in love feel so good?
Dr. Fisher: The main chemical involved is dopamine, which produces feelings of euphoria, energy, sleeplessness, and focused attention on your beloved.
Q: Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Dr. Fisher: Yes. It probably happens to men more than women because men are more visual, but I think we can all remember times when we felt an instant attraction to someone we barely knew. It has a practical purpose: In the animal kingdom you can’t spend three months discussing your résumé; you need to feel instant sparks to start the breeding process.
Q: Is falling in love all about timing?
Dr. Fisher: Timing is important. The perfect partner can sit right next to you at a party, and you might not notice him or her if you’re too busy at work, enmeshed in another relationship, or otherwise preoccupied. But if you’ve just moved to a new city, recovered from an unsatisfying love affair, begun to make enough money to raise a family, are suffering through a difficult experience, or have a good deal of spare time, you are ripe to fall in love.
Q: Is there anything we can do to make someone fall for us (or make ourselves fall for someone)?
Dr. Fisher: Do new things together. Novelty and excitement all drive up the activity of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain. These neurotransmitters are associated with energy, elation, focused attention and motivation—central traits of romantic love.
Q: Is there anything you can do to make yourself stop loving someone?
Dr. Fisher: Some people, especially women, tend to talk about a failed relationship so much that they re-traumatize themselves. Instead, get rid of your ex’s cards and letters. Don’t call or write. Get some sunshine and exercise, because both can change brain chemistry.
Q: What’s the difference between love and lust?
Dr. Fisher: Lust generally dissipates after having sex and returns hours or days later. You can feel it for several people at the same time and not necessarily feel jealous. But when you’re in love, you are very possessive. And romantic feelings don’t dissipate after having sex; in fact, they can intensify.
Q: Does having sex make people fall in love?
Dr. Fisher: Having sex can trigger love—probably because after orgasm, there’s a peak in dopamine activity. So watch out if you casually bed down with someone—you might unintentionally fall for them.
Q: How important a role does chemistry play in love?
Dr. Fisher: I believe that when the chemistry of one personality meshes well with the chemistry of another, it will continually combust throughout the relationship—keeping both partners together and happy during dry spells when feelings of romance are low.
Q: How do men and women experience love differently?
Dr. Fisher: Men fall in love faster than women do. Women take longer because they have to create a “memory trail” of their mate’s behaviors. She has to remember what he promised, what he’s done for the partnership, and what he failed to do.
Q: What do men look for in a mate?
Dr. Fisher: Men are more likely to choose women who display signs of youth and beauty—the first time that they marry, men around the world tend to marry women who are three years younger than themselves. Men are also attracted to women who “need” them. Men want to be helpful.
Q: Can someone truly love more than one person?
Dr. Fisher: No. I think you can feel lust for more than one person, and feelings of attachment for more than one person. But not love. As the Indian aphorism goes, “The lane of love is narrow; there is room for only one.
Excerpt from:
http://www.chemistry.com/datingadvice/LoveExplained
from an empty moment something arrives
notarose- Posts : 9966
Join date : 2014-02-24
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
notarose wrote:Love, Explained By Judy Dutton
Q: In a nutshell, why do we fall in love?
Dr. Fisher: I’ve come to think that romantic love is one of three basic brain systems that evolved for reproduction. Each evolved for a reason: The sex drive evolved to get you out there looking for partners. Romantic love evolved to enable you to focus your energy on just one person at a time, conserving time and energy. And attachment, the feeling of security you can feel with a long-term partner, evolved to help you stay together long enough to raise kids.
Q: Why does being in love feel so good?
Dr. Fisher: The main chemical involved is dopamine, which produces feelings of euphoria, energy, sleeplessness, and focused attention on your beloved.
Q: Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Dr. Fisher: Yes. It probably happens to men more than women because men are more visual, but I think we can all remember times when we felt an instant attraction to someone we barely knew. It has a practical purpose: In the animal kingdom you can’t spend three months discussing your résumé; you need to feel instant sparks to start the breeding process.
Q: Is falling in love all about timing?
Dr. Fisher: Timing is important. The perfect partner can sit right next to you at a party, and you might not notice him or her if you’re too busy at work, enmeshed in another relationship, or otherwise preoccupied. But if you’ve just moved to a new city, recovered from an unsatisfying love affair, begun to make enough money to raise a family, are suffering through a difficult experience, or have a good deal of spare time, you are ripe to fall in love.
Q: Is there anything we can do to make someone fall for us (or make ourselves fall for someone)?
Dr. Fisher: Do new things together. Novelty and excitement all drive up the activity of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain. These neurotransmitters are associated with energy, elation, focused attention and motivation—central traits of romantic love.
Q: Is there anything you can do to make yourself stop loving someone?
Dr. Fisher: Some people, especially women, tend to talk about a failed relationship so much that they re-traumatize themselves. Instead, get rid of your ex’s cards and letters. Don’t call or write. Get some sunshine and exercise, because both can change brain chemistry.
Q: What’s the difference between love and lust?
Dr. Fisher: Lust generally dissipates after having sex and returns hours or days later. You can feel it for several people at the same time and not necessarily feel jealous. But when you’re in love, you are very possessive. And romantic feelings don’t dissipate after having sex; in fact, they can intensify.
Q: Does having sex make people fall in love?
Dr. Fisher: Having sex can trigger love—probably because after orgasm, there’s a peak in dopamine activity. So watch out if you casually bed down with someone—you might unintentionally fall for them.
Q: How important a role does chemistry play in love?
Dr. Fisher: I believe that when the chemistry of one personality meshes well with the chemistry of another, it will continually combust throughout the relationship—keeping both partners together and happy during dry spells when feelings of romance are low.
Q: How do men and women experience love differently?
Dr. Fisher: Men fall in love faster than women do. Women take longer because they have to create a “memory trail” of their mate’s behaviors. She has to remember what he promised, what he’s done for the partnership, and what he failed to do.
Q: What do men look for in a mate?
Dr. Fisher: Men are more likely to choose women who display signs of youth and beauty—the first time that they marry, men around the world tend to marry women who are three years younger than themselves. Men are also attracted to women who “need” them. Men want to be helpful.
Q: Can someone truly love more than one person?
Dr. Fisher: No. I think you can feel lust for more than one person, and feelings of attachment for more than one person. But not love. As the Indian aphorism goes, “The lane of love is narrow; there is room for only one.
Excerpt from:
http://www.chemistry.com/datingadvice/LoveExplained
Very interesting, Thanks NR!! I quoted this because I wanted to highlight sleepleepness above. Nick tweeted Can't Sleep Won't Sleep, sounds like he is in love!!!
Last edited by Brill on Mon May 04, 2015 1:06 pm; edited 1 time in total
"All Opinions By Me are IMO, Unless Otherwise Noted"
Brill- Posts : 3172
Join date : 2011-03-23
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
Brill, a case of great minds thinking alike
from an empty moment something arrives
notarose- Posts : 9966
Join date : 2014-02-24
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
wow awesome read thanks for sharing!!
emusha- Posts : 5656
Join date : 2011-06-20
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
Anyone else remember in Andi's season Nick warned herbefore they went to fantasy suite he would keep her awake all night talking!! Can't sleep, won't sleep could be a very good sign!!!!
Luvstruck- Posts : 1655
Join date : 2011-06-22
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
Luvstruck wrote:Anyone else remember in Andi's season Nick warned herbefore they went to fantasy suite he would keep her awake all night talking!! Can't sleep, won't sleep could be a very good sign!!!!
I agree. The "can't sleep" if only thing tweeted would have made it more of an either way thing for me. I mean it still could be positive as still being excited for something but it also lends the possibility of something bothersome causing the sleeplessness. The "won't sleep" adds a defiance, basically indicating one doesn't want to sleep as they prefer to be awake ie, excited, anitcipating something, an interest worth staying awake for. OMG I just reread above and you would think I am writing some type of college thesis or something when I am just analyzing four words in a Nick tweet!
MonicaJM2001- Posts : 2867
Join date : 2013-06-12
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
Nick (or someone) tweeted a couple times about 3 hrs ago 1) I believe in response to James age guess thing cause all the tweet said was "OMG" and then he tweeted he was out of bubble gum #bubblebummer .... He favored a few random things too including an Elan tweet and bachelornation Jaclyn. Coincidentally Elan was also tweeting 3hrs ago as well.... Anyone want to take up a bubble gum collection for the poor deprived guy?
I was going to (insert any productive activity) but then well...........Nick
MonicaJM2001- Posts : 2867
Join date : 2013-06-12
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
MonicaJM2001 wrote:Nick (or someone) tweeted a couple times about 3 hrs ago 1) I believe in response to James age guess thing cause all the tweet said was "OMG" and then he tweeted he was out of bubble gum #bubblebummer .... He favored a few random things too including an Elan tweet and bachelornation Jaclyn. Coincidentally Elan was also tweeting 3hrs ago as well.... Anyone want to take up a bubble gum collection for the poor deprived guy?
I think James Viall is retweeting himself because he likes his own jokes and I like them too. James is brilliant and very irreverent.
So TPTB need Nick's SM to remain active because most viewers are unspoiled - they just re-enter the franchise bubble once the show begins. Someone needs Nick's passwords to access his accounts. Enter James. Heck, he even goes to Chicago to visit Sam and post a geo tag from the Little Goat.
Who better to impersonate Nick than a blood relative who has the same wit gene and access to pics plus loves being creative? Sure, James may be getting a few sketchy clues to aid in this SM adventure.
Could be a match ... but I think big brother might not be happy with all of bro James' posts when he returns
Food for thought.
The first clue could have been when Nick was in NY with Kaitlyn and Coach Brian tweeted James about Nick not answer his voice mail message(s).
from an empty moment something arrives
notarose- Posts : 9966
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Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
nr Interesting speculation!
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Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
Good thoughts NR hmmm
I was going to (insert any productive activity) but then well...........Nick
MonicaJM2001- Posts : 2867
Join date : 2013-06-12
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
This week at some unknown time in some unknown place a red rose will be lifted and it will symbolize the future of Kaitlyn Bristowe.
And Nicholas Viall will return to Chi a different man then when he left because every action has an outcome and every experience an effect. I think about how, as a viewer, I will be on #pinsandneedles because it is part of the human condition to invest in the happiness of others, even strangers, and to bind ourselves to them through empathy and the wish that love finds room for all in its embrace.
If I were to author of their story, it would be about a man who wanted very much to meet a woman and simply live in her laughter & her kindness and let time grow a love worthy of a future. There would be quiet talks in the wee hours, times of shared silence, and kisses that sink deep into the soul. There would be slow steps in a fast world; that organic bubble that makes everyone and everything outside of 2 fade away. There would be no critics.
If I were the author of this story, Kaitlyn would be the one not because she is the only woman there but because there is where he was meant to find her.
"If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’
- Kipling
And Nicholas Viall will return to Chi a different man then when he left because every action has an outcome and every experience an effect. I think about how, as a viewer, I will be on #pinsandneedles because it is part of the human condition to invest in the happiness of others, even strangers, and to bind ourselves to them through empathy and the wish that love finds room for all in its embrace.
If I were to author of their story, it would be about a man who wanted very much to meet a woman and simply live in her laughter & her kindness and let time grow a love worthy of a future. There would be quiet talks in the wee hours, times of shared silence, and kisses that sink deep into the soul. There would be slow steps in a fast world; that organic bubble that makes everyone and everything outside of 2 fade away. There would be no critics.
If I were the author of this story, Kaitlyn would be the one not because she is the only woman there but because there is where he was meant to find her.
"If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’
- Kipling
Last edited by notarose on Tue May 05, 2015 9:33 am; edited 1 time in total
from an empty moment something arrives
notarose- Posts : 9966
Join date : 2014-02-24
Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - ***SLEUTHING - SPOILERS*** - Thread #12
notarose wrote:This week at some unknown time in some unknown place a red rose will be lifted and it will symbolize the future of Kaitlyn Bristowe.
And Nicholas Viall will return to Chi a different man then when he left because every action has an outcome and every experience an effect. I think about how, as a viewer, I will be on #pinsandneedles because it is part of the human condition to invest in the happiness of others, even strangers, and to bind ourselves to them through empathy and the wish that love finds room for all in its embrace.
If I were to author of their story, it would be about a man who wanted very much to meet a woman and simply live in her laughter & her kindness and let time grow a love worthy of a lifetime. There would be quiet talks in the wee hours, times of shared silence, and kisses that sink deep into the soul. There would be slow steps in a fast world; that organic bubble that makes everyone and everything outside of 2 fade away. There would be no critics.
If I were the author of this story, Kaitlyn would be the one not because she is the only woman there but because there is where he was meant to find her.
"If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’
- Kipling
You are hired as the author of their story as far as I am concerned!!!!!
MonicaJM2001- Posts : 2867
Join date : 2013-06-12
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