Colton Underwood & Cassie Randolph - Bachelor 23 - Discussion

Shoot I guess I'm going to be one of the debbie downers

I still think that they have a weird dynamic. I feel like Cassie basically resigned herself to Colton's love for her, which had quite the amount of TV/public pressure. I have a feeling that down the road, she's going to be overwhelmed by him and is going to want an out. I think her present contentedness comes from finally having made a decision, but IMO that decision was essentially made for her and she went along with it. And if that is the case, it'll probably lead to resentment in the future. Should be interesting to see how things go.

All JMO of course.

Enchantress wrote:Shoot I guess I'm going to be one of the debbie downers

I still think that they have a weird dynamic. I feel like Cassie basically resigned herself to Colton's love for her, which had quite the amount of TV/public pressure. I have a feeling that down the road, she's going to be overwhelmed by him and is going to want an out. I think her present contentedness comes from finally having made a decision, but IMO that decision was essentially made for her and she went along with it. And if that is the case, it'll probably lead to resentment in the future. Should be interesting to see how things go.

All JMO of course.

They have been together for four months since the show ended. They have see each other at least once a week. Cassie has stated over and over that she did feel pressured during the show but after is when she knew for sure that she loved him. They both have so much in common and she can’t keep her hands off of him. The way she looks at him you can see how much she truly loves him IMO. They are both very religious and both are taking this serious. IMO if she really did not see a future with him she would of walked away.

Almost every couple looks happy and in love when the show is over; but most still don't make it. There is nothing special about these two that makes me think they'll last longer than any other couple imo. Same odds as everyone else, just have to wait and see. Imo.

Chgohighlife wrote: snipped
@GuardianAngel

I’m looking forward to seeing more of them as well. My point was and is, he came built in with some really good offers that are pretty hard to refuse if you like someone, IMO.
Two things;
One, there’s a clear “love conquers all” take away that is romantic and beautiful but, I spoke of concern for the other extreme of the message or perception that when confronted with “no”, you need to just keep trying and forge ahead. I said IMO she had really good incentives to change her mind and she did.  I’m sure there were many reasons for Colton to be encouraged and or, persistent but, we were not shown them and therefore, his determination seemed like, I believe it was Jimmy Kimmel said, “stalkerish” as a joke.  
Two, I don’t think “ludicrous” is a fair description of my concern for the message one could take away given the edit - especially given the rules of this forum. All IMO.

My opinion of comparing no means no as ludicrous is because for me, no means no is used when there is no sexual consent and results in forced sexually activity. I have always felt highly about Colton, I have my reasons, and I never for one second thought he was stalking Cassie. I felt he was truly in love, and he knew she was strugelling. We also know post show from the many interviews, and as many suspected, she was not ready for an engagement as expected from the show. She also thought Colton was not going to leave without an engagement and she couldn't commit coupled with her Father's visit and influence.

These are all things that sleuthers have speculated for weeks now. Colton admitted he knew how she felt about him, and that's why he didn't give up. This is the complete opposite IMHO of No Means No.

We also now know Colton blamed everyone, his words in an interview, CH Producers etc for the way it all unfolded, A lot of sleuthers knew this and discussed when they caught up with him and his behavior towards CH and the producers. Now he is thankful for the show.  

If Cassie left the show, and he continued to contact her, and she continued to say no, that's a different story IMHO.

I respect your opinion as I do everyone's entitlement to voice their opinion. I felt that was a strong word to use in comparing the situation IMHO.

I like the odds for these two. Having an engagement on their own terms and seeing each other once a week (while the show was running) are two pluses in my book. Of course, the real relationship starts now, but I already like what I'm seeing post show. They seem very compatible, imo.

The picnic conversation in the finale seemed like the real turning point for Cassie. Colton was receptive enough to know what to ask, and he knew immediately what she meant and what kind of reassurance she needed from him. Pretty impressive for a guy who has been labeled immature from the start.
Her brief and understated story really got to me. “You don’t have the freedom to be you anymore” is chilling.

It strikes me how reoccurring this theme has been in recent seasons. Becca’s ex stalked her all the way to Peru (with help from TPTB of course). JoJo recently told her story about how her mother and BFF pushed her to go on the show to get away from a controlling ex that wouldn’t go away. (That guy sent flowers and a love letter to her HTD, and then, when she was filming her own season, trashed her in the tabloids.)
It’s a good thing that this is talked about more. Unfortunately in Cassie’s case, it was overshadowed by all the stupid virginity talk.
JMO

I was really impressed with Colton when Cassie opened up about her past relationship where she felt controlled. I think that was a real turning point for the both of them. 

I think their "day by day" approach is really smart. Not huge commitments yet, just enjoying dating, with no added pressure. Jmo.

@Billysmom

Billysmom wrote:I do find myself wondering how we might have reacted if the ending had not been spoiled.

Would there have been more of the sort of response that des' finale had? In terms of shock value, anyway?

I was unspoiled all season.  Didn't come spoiled side until after watching the final finale and I can tell you that I thought it was Cassie from the moment he put the butterfly in his coat pocket and always believed they would end up together.  When she left I was worried for a moment (over night actually), but when Colton did what he said and let the other two go home without the fanfare of a RC I realized he was a man of his word.  I LOVED that he didn't fold to the usual format of the show. I understand I am watching an edited version of what happens.  Conversations were had that we did not see.  When he said he "felt" that Cassie loves him and she was worth fighting for I believe he knew she was struggling with getting engaged while he was dating another girl.  Caring for and loving him was never the issue.

Kudos to her for honoring her feelings and walking away when she realized she couldn't give him what she believed he wanted.  She deserved to be his one and only, not just through words but actions.  High praise to Colton for showing her she deserved more and giving it to her.  To me, this shows mutual respect and compassion for one another.  

People can say how immature they are, chasing fame, etc....  I don't see it.  I see two young people in love and in tune with each other trying to navigate a relationship.

Colton was not my favorite choice for TB, but he proved me wrong.  I am more impressed with him than any others in a long time.

blueblues wrote:The picnic conversation in the finale seemed like the real turning point for Cassie. Colton was receptive enough to know what to ask, and he knew immediately what she meant and what kind of reassurance she needed from him. Pretty impressive for a guy who has been labeled immature from the start.
Her brief and understated story really got to me. “You don’t have the freedom to be you anymore” is chilling.

It strikes me how reoccurring this theme has been in recent seasons. Becca’s ex stalked her all the way to Peru (with help from TPTB of course). JoJo recently told her story about how her mother and BFF pushed her to go on the show to get away from a controlling ex that wouldn’t go away. (That guy sent flowers and a love letter to her HTD, and then, when she was filming her own season, trashed her in the tabloids.)
It’s a good thing that this is talked about more. Unfortunately in Cassie’s case, it was overshadowed by all the stupid virginity talk.
JMO

I rewatched parts of the finale and the picnic conversation is what stuck out the most to me. You could see Cassie's guard starting to come down. Colton was so patient with her in that moment and you could feel Cassie starting to relax more.

Thanks Frag for bringing the videos over.

@locoforbach Well said, IA. I enjoyed reading your postings in the NO Spoiler thread! It's really amazing to read sleuthing by non spoiled members, great job!

GuardianAngel wrote:@locoforbach Well said, IA. I enjoyed reading your postings in the NO Spoiler thread! It's really amazing to read sleuthing by non spoiled members, great job!

Thanks GA!  I hate not to be with everyone sleuthing but I find not knowing the end is so much more enjoyable.  I wish there were more who could stay unspoiled but I get the "want to know".  I am basically never on SM so that helps keep me unspoiled.

This was one of the best seasons ever.  I could have done without most of the girl drama, so many conflicts this time around.  I just focused on C&C and kept my fingers crossed.  For me they were like Matty and Laura (Aussie), it was so obvious from early on.  I hope these two make it work for the long haul