Colton Underwood - Episode Mar 4th - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

I usually would agree with Sharleen but I think she is missing some key points in the Colton/Cassie "break up."  She failed to mention Cassie's father's role in what happened plus she failed to mention the Bachelor bubble/producer antics (which she often does).
I think if Cassie was that self absorbed in that conversation with Colton, the goodbye would have been a little easier for him. He would have just said "see you later, maybe you aren't the girl I thought you were."
He knew the producers and father messed with Cassie's head and he was more angry with them, not her so much.
I do agree with Sharleen though, in that Cassie comes off as very young. Then again, many of this season's contestants did.
JMO...

I usually would agree with Sharleen but I think she is missing some key points in the Colton/Cassie "break up."  She failed to mention Cassie's father's role in what happened plus she failed to mention the Bachelor bubble/producer antics (which she often does).
I think if Cassie was that self absorbed in that conversation with Colton, the goodbye would have been a little easier for him. He would have just said "see you later, maybe you aren't the girl I thought you were."
He knew the producers and father messed with Cassie's head and he was more angry with them, not her so much.
I do agree with Sharleen though, in that Cassie comes off as very young. Then again, many of this season's contestants did.
JMO...

I think Colton blames the producers in Cassie having doubts. When she stepped aside and started to freak out saying she was having second thoughts with the producers, notice how he got up and brought her somewhere away from the producers. He does understand that this is all producer manipulation. I mean, the death glare he gave to the producers when she told him that her dad had visited her shows me he knows that there was manipulation played. Which I am SO CURIOUS if next week they will show Colton confronting the producers or to some extent addressing that manipulation. Because when I first heard that he had let go of the other two girls without a FRC I was wondering if a bachelor could even do that! But it seems he comes out strong in this situation. So we shall see.

As I mentioned above I really haven't been following that closely. The only reason I tuned in to any episodes was because of the spoilers to be honest.  

I did watch the premiere and did watch the last couple episodes in prep for tonight. So given all there here is my uninformed take...

I really enjoyed last night's episode because it was obviously drama filled, but it also had some genuine emotional moments in it. I am not a Colton fan AT ALL. I did not like how he handled some of the girl drama (seem to be fueling the fire) or his need to have a "permission" from a father....which I know others disagree with.... but I will say I was extremely impressed with how he handled himself last night. I really felt for him and believe his emotions, and believe he has truly fallen for Cassie. He obviously likes Cassie a lot.

What I most appreciated from him last night was his willingness to be patient with her. His ability to convey that all relationships move at different speeds and to try and unfocus her attention on the "next two" weeks and rather on the potential of just a relationship in the real world. While I have found him to be super immature in a lot of ways with very limited dating experience/life experience, I found his approach and response last night showed a lot of maturity in this very unrealistic world. I was impressed. My heart just broke for him, honestly and I do believe he truly fell for Cassie.

As for Cassie, I really liked her on the premiere night she seemed very poised/smart/well spoken (even though she messed up the sign language). Last night she came across as very immature, how she handled the breakup I was not impressed with at all. I know they "end" up together, but during the breakup she barely showed ANY emotion and barely seemed sympathetic to Colton at all. Other than saying "stop shaking", which she said with such a cutesy voice, I just couldn't believe that she didn't have any ounce of sympathy in her voice. She just didn't seem invested into him at all. I am not saying that everyone needs to be hysterical in that situation, but I didn't feel any strong feelings from Cassie to Colton at all. And at the end when she said "are you mad at me"? Like Sharleen said I felt like she constantly made it about her, her, her and not about Colton, or her and Colton at all.

In terms of Cassie and her dad's conversation, I know a lot of people found him controlling or didn't like it. But I liked it, or at least most of it. I don't agree that for your future spouse there is never a shadow of a doubt. Some people fall in love instantly, others fall slowly over time. I agree with Colton there, different relationships move at different speeds. I have a friend who really didn't like her husband when they were first set up, they became friends for years and through those years she fell deeply in love with him. So I do not agree with him there. But what I did appreciate was that he said to his daughter to follow her heart. And that his response would have been different to Colton's blessing question if Cassie didn't seem so conflicted. Which he wasn't wrong on - Cassie is conflicted, she has said she is conflicted. I saw a father saying, I trust you, but you need to trust your gut, you don't need to rush into anything. Cassie seemed "at peace" after talking to her dad. If she was still really conflicted about Colton and their relationship I feel like she would have had a more obvious emotional reaction, and would have reacted differently to some of the things that Colton said to her (that he would be patient, this doesn't need to end in an engagement etc. etc.) Instead she just seemed to want out and him not to be mad at her.

I don't blame Cassie for breaking up with Colton, I think she did the right thing. I may not like how she did it, but I truly feel like she wasn't that invested in him and was looking for an "out". I just don't know where we go from here...All IMO

@sbolduc well said! I agree with pretty much everything! 

I don't blame her for dumping him either. I felt like she's a people pleaser and didn't want to hurt him, but it was obvious to me she was looking for an out when he offered to just date and you could see her thinking "oh, shoot, what excuse do I use now?". I just think she's young and has a hard time being confident in her own decisions and that's why she needed her dad to come in and essentially give her "permission" to leave. I didn't love what her father said (as I don't believe in the idea of never having doubts or just knowing), but I think 
it's what she needed to hear to confirm what she already wanted to do.

IMO.

Cocoasneeze wrote:And I don't agree with Sharleen in this instance. Jmo. Imho the "When you know, you know" imho doesn't work in bachelor scenario, and many times in real life. Jmo.
Added, that Cassie did say, how she wanted Colton to get all he wants, with a woman who's insanely in love with him. I don't know what that is but thinking about him. Jmo

Right! when you know, you know...for many but for some people it take something to happen for them to know.

pbmax wrote:

Cocoasneeze wrote:And I don't agree with Sharleen in this instance. Jmo. Imho the "When you know, you know" imho doesn't work in bachelor scenario, and many times in real life. Jmo.
Added, that Cassie did say, how she wanted Colton to get all he wants, with a woman who's insanely in love with him. I don't know what that is but thinking about him. Jmo

Right! when you know, you know...for many but for some people it take something to happen for them to know.

Or simply time. Many people don't know after their third date. And the thought of making a possibly life long commitment would scare the crap out of them.

lavenderfan wrote:I think Colton blames the producers in Cassie having doubts. When she stepped aside and started to freak out saying she was having second thoughts with the producers, notice how he got up and brought her somewhere away from the producers. He does understand that this is all producer manipulation. I mean, the death glare he gave to the producers when she told him that her dad had visited her shows me he knows that there was manipulation played. Which I am SO CURIOUS if next week they will show Colton confronting the producers or to some extent addressing that manipulation. Because when I first heard that he had let go of the other two girls without a FRC I was wondering if a bachelor could even do that! But it seems he comes out strong in this situation. So we shall see.

yep i agree this interview chris gave seems to allude imo that next episode colton and chris/producers will show raw emotions over their influence

It will be another milestone moment for this show if they show Colton calling out
Chris/producers. I've been waiting for that moment for years!

philphan wrote:It will be another milestone moment for this show if they show Colton calling out
Chris/producers. I've been waiting for that moment for years!

What a moment that would be!

Doubtful we will see that shown. The emotional fallout CH alludes to most likely revolves around how upset Colton is that Cassie left and what he’s going to do next.
Even today, the DAFJ, Colton is only saying that he wanted “time alone”, nothing about the producers/ CH which would be a Bachelor no no.

philphan wrote:It will be another milestone moment for this show if they show Colton calling out
Chris/producers. I've been waiting for that moment for years!

You can tell Colton was furious with the look he gave the producer. I hope he does tell them off. No wonder he punched the camera. 

He knew immediately what they did to ruin his night with her, that's prob why he told her he will not give up on the relationship even if she leaves. and probably why he asked her if she came there tonight with intentions of leaving. He was onto them. 

@notarose where are you? I’ve been wanting to know what you think of all of this? I so much enjoy reading your take on the psychological side of things. I was pleasantly surprised with the maturity that Colton showed last night and how gently he reacted to her. Cassie did seem to lack a bit of empathy which was hard to watch. I’m curious to see how they work through it all. BEST SEASON EVER!!!