Arie Luyendyk Jr - Lauren Burnham - Bachelor 22 - Discussion #2

As I recall he did say in an interview that agreed to filming because he knew the breakup was "all on him" and wanted the public to see that. IMO if it had not been filmed, it would have been a SM discussion of he said, she said and whether Becca contributed to the breakup, not just Arie wanting to breakup. Arie made it clear his reasoning for the breakup was he wanted to pursue Lauren and there was nothing wrong with Becca. Unfortunately it backfired for Arie and made people angry for her to be broken up with on camera. IMO production knew they had ratings gold and were not going to pass up the opportunity and had a hand in Arie doing it on camera, plus I think they knew that would provide huge support for Becca being the next bachelorette if she wanted to do it.

Ryan Seacrest interviewed Arie and asked why didn't he just leave and Arie paused for a minute and said "production was involved" which I took to mean that production was telling him he could not leave until they were ready. I think Arie is telling the truth because you could see him looking over to someone as if he is waiting for them to give him direction. I honestly don't think he wanted to prolong it. It was excrutiating for both of them and IMO exploitive of production.

He was damned if he and damned if he didn't because I remember in previews it looked he was just walking out on her and people were outraged at that. There was no good way to break it off, especially when one is deep into the relationship and the other wants out. That is if Becca was ever really into Arie, IDK. All IMO.

I don’t buy it for one second he did any of that for Becca’s benefit. He literally cares about one person and only person only... himself

He just says bullsh!t to make himself look better. He wanted her to be the bachelorette? Lol ok. IMO

all JMHO!!

Diana wrote:I don’t buy it for one second he did any of that for Becca’s benefit. He literally cares about one person and only person only... himself

He just says bullsh!t to make himself look better. He wanted her to be the bachelorette? Lol ok. IMO

all JMHO!!

Plus the whole he couldn't contact Lauren without tptb permission is total bull IMO. He managed to contact her just fine via SM and show off that he was wearing the boring socks she gave him. Not to mention liking her dog picture. Those are just the instances I remember. There are ways and IMO based on that greeting he got when he arrived at her parents house, there is no way they hadn't been in plenty of contact.

If you haven't been around the block with TPTB and the Bachelor/ette shows. It is very true. When they go on interviews they have handlers with them that will allow them to only say certain things. They control the show and what happens during filming and for some time after. It has been like that from the beginning. They sign contracts and have to go with what TPTB want. That is why they have story lines. That is why they put certain people in certain roles, like the villians and the good guys. This happens each season.

Iluvbachette wrote:If you haven't been around the block with TPTB and the Bachelor/ette shows. It is very true. When they go on interviews they have handlers with them that will allow them to only say certain things. They control the show and what happens during filming and for some time after. It has been like that from the beginning. They sign contracts and have to go with what TPTB want. That is why they have story lines. That is why they put certain people in certain roles, like the villians and the good guys. This happens each season.

I don't know if this is referring to my post above. I've been around plenty and know how the show works/manipulates. The handlers are around during the show and during interviews, however I don't think they are with him the whole time while the show is airing. If they were, then I doubt he would have been sending secret sock messages...since he is such a rule follower. I find that Arie is full of BS. His story changes depending how he is trying to cover his a**. At first he was going to be decisive and a rule breaker, but now apparently he can't because he is a good little soldier and does as he is told by producers...and decency be d*mned.

The handlers obviously aren’t living with Arie so they can’t control everything he does. Just look back at Emily’s season. His visit to Charlotte to win back his good friend’s fiancé wasn’t “sanctioned” by TPTB if I recall correctly. He followed a similar path by reaching out to Lauren. No producer leash on him in either scenario. Arie does what Arie wants.

philphan wrote:Arie does what Arie wants.

Right up until the producers get wind of what he's thinking - IMO. Once they do, I think Arie is like a minnow swimming in a pool of sharks. Same as any past, present, or future lead.
JMHO

Lucas15 wrote:

philphan wrote:Arie does what Arie wants.

Right up until the producers get wind of what he's thinking - IMO. Once they do, I think Arie is like a minnow swimming in a pool of sharks. Same as any past, present, or future lead.
JMHO

Yes, he does. He always has and has always gotten by with it when it comes to women. It is amazing how he switches the light off so easily when it suits him. Now, that's the Arie I never saw coming... not once during his stint as a contestant. I don't like this Arie AT ALL.

With that said, I do think TPTB were pushing him to provide them with a public break up to film. I have no doubt about it. Could he have said no, I have too much respect for Becca...absolutely, and he should have.  For all I know they threw in the trip to Iceland and Barcelona for his troubles. That is not a fact, JMO...but anything is possible. TPTB  didn't have to spell out what they wanted as he knew they had all the leverage.

I do not blame Arie for having a change of heart. It's his heart. BUT, I can blame him for the way he chose to handle the break up that day, the sympathy he showed...his actions, his words. He has NO couth...not even a little. His actions are tasteless (for lack of a better word). I don't hate him ... I just don't like him anymore. I don't like who he is or his core values....esp when they matter most. JMO

Lucas15 wrote:

philphan wrote:Arie does what Arie wants.

Right up until the producers get wind of what he's thinking - IMO. Once they do, I think Arie is like a minnow swimming in a pool of sharks. Same as any past, present, or future lead.
JMHO

I do agree with the "minnow" analogy AND producers being "sharks" but not exactly sure how they would get wind of what Arie is thinking unless he tells them. They definitely aren't Arie mind readers. IMO.

In his first season, Arie took an unsanctioned trip to Emily (didn't tell producers) and in his second season, he made an unsanctioned phone call to Lauren (didn't tell producers) -- not to mention that attempt to "seduce" over social media with socks! I think, if producers were mind readers or Arie whispers , they would've have caught BOTH those situations on camera.

For all Arie's talk about taking risks, he didn't show that vulnerability until after those issues were resolved one way or another. Denied by Emily, accepted by Lauren.

All IMO.

North wrote:I do agree with the "minnow" analogy AND producers being "sharks" but not exactly sure how they would get wind of what Arie is thinking unless he tells them. They definitely aren't Arie mind readers. IMO.

IMO, he told them. From what Courtney said (on RS podcast) about her initial meetings with Arie after filming was over, Arie tried to reach out to past leads who had been through similar experiences to see how they felt and how they coped with it. IMO Arie made the decision to attempt contact with other leads through production; in so doing he honored his contract but jumped in the middle of that "shark pool" and had no choice but to play the cards that production dealt him from that point forward. It's been my opinion ever since I read about it that the Nov 22 cease and desist letter the show had sent to RS was sent because they knew then what trajectory the season ending could take and they didn't want it spoiled, so that indicates to me when they found out - which was almost immediately.

IMO it's easy for me to say what I think he should have / could have done instead of what he actually did do but hindsight is always 20 / 20. Perhaps after knowing all that happened and how it happened he might make different decisions if he had it to do over - I really have no idea because I'm not in his head so that's entirely speculation on my part.

Lucas15 wrote:

North wrote:I do agree with the "minnow" analogy AND producers being "sharks" but not exactly sure how they would get wind of what Arie is thinking unless he tells them. They definitely aren't Arie mind readers. IMO.

IMO, he told them. From what Courtney said (on RS podcast) about her initial meetings with Arie after filming was over, Arie tried to reach out to past leads who had been through similar experiences to see how they felt and how they coped with it. IMO Arie made the decision to attempt contact with other leads through production; in so doing he honored his contract but jumped in the middle of that "shark pool" and had no choice but to play the cards that production dealt him from that point forward. It's been my opinion ever since I read about it that the Nov 22 cease and desist letter the show had sent to RS was sent because they knew then what trajectory the season ending could take and they didn't want it spoiled, so that indicates to me when they found out - which was almost immediately.

IMO it's easy for me to say what I think he should have / could have done instead of what he actually did do but hindsight is always 20 / 20. Perhaps after knowing all that happened and how it happened he might make different decisions if he had it to do over - I really have no idea because I'm not in his head so that's entirely speculation on my part.

I am unclear about what you are referring to here (re: 1st bolded phrase). I'd have to go find it but, but I'm sure I read an article quoting Robert Mills, that TPTB did NOT know about Arie going to visit Emily and if they had, they would've filmed it.

I'm also not sure how much I tie the cease and desist letter into this season, as a prediction indicator for the "most-dramatic" finale ever (re: 2nd bolded phrase). If anything, IMO, TPTB were just hedging their bets, as they should every season but I am curious about your speculation. When you say "almost immediately" -- is "immediately" after the Rose Ceremony or after he called Lauren for closure/reunification?

So if TPTB knew immediately after the FRC, that means they actually know Arie better than Arie knows Arie (and his predilection for breaking the rules!). Which to me, I find a little sad only because it would've been better for everyone had he proposed to the woman he wanted most (Lauren) the first go-round. So if they know Arie so well, why didn't TPTB film more of his interaction with Lauren B. (leading up to break-up and then afterward as well)? This is "reality" tv after all, we got reality with the break-up -- it would've been great to see and hear reality with the reunion (IMO). Because it was pretty obvious (IMO) that Arie and Lauren's filmed tv "reunion," that the real reunion had already happened online and over the phone, and this filmed scene was just "window dressing."

Look, I'm not dogging Arie for his change of heart -- he should absolutely be with who he loves. And I 100% agree about not knowing how I'd react in that situation...or even throughout a season. But, I also don't think everything Arie has done or said, can be excused away or blamed on someone else. I do think he and Lauren are a WAY better match and wished he had enough self-awareness or courage to pick her the first time.

I'm curious about Kendall's remark in this lengthy interview she did with Bekah where she said "A lot of people on the show, if not everyone, knew he was going to break-up with Becca before she did. She was blindsided, but everyone else knew."

I don't understand this - her friends knew and didn't tell her? Sorry if this was discussed when the article came out.

http://www.vulture.com/2018/03/bekah-m-kendall-bachelor-conversation.html