Bachelorette 14 - Becca Kufrin - All Blogs - NO Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

Bachelorette Becca Kufrin Explains Her Frustration Over Colton's Past with Tia: 'Can I Trust Him?'

BECCA KUFRIN  

June 05, 2018 04:01 PM

Becca Kufrin vied for Arie Luyendyk Jr.s heart on season 8 of  The Bachelor. Now, she’s on her own journey to find love on the latest season of The Bachelorette — and she’s blogging about it exclusively for PEOPLE! Follow Becca on Twitter at @thebkoof.

Okay guys, can you believe it — we’re already into the first week of dates! But before I get into everything, I just wanted to say a few things. I was really nervous putting my heart on the line again and stepping into the role as Bachelorette. But the love and support you’ve continued to share has meant the world to me, so thank you. Now let’s get into it!

Kicking things off, I’d be lying if I said I knew how I’d handle 21 hearts on the line. I felt the full spectrum of emotions after that first night, and I didn’t want to disappoint these guys or myself. I just had to remind myself to stay open and true to me.

There were so many emotions running through me heading into those first three dates. I was nervous and excited ,and waves of memories came streaming back to me like crazy. Last season Arie asked me on the very first date, and a one on one at that. I remember feeling so grateful, so elated and touched that he saw something in me that made him want to share that day with me. During that first date with Arie I was lucky enough to be pampered with Neil Lane jewelry, Christian Louboutin shoes and dresses from designer Rachel Zoe. It. Was. Incredible. So, heading into my own first date, I wanted to take a little bit of that magic from last year and share it with these guys. But this time, muddy the waters for them. Once these guys were dressed up in their tuxedos I was floored by how quickly they went from handsome boyfriends to striking grooms in waiting. But here is the thing, I’m not looking for a nice-looking man who can rock a tux … no, no. I’m looking for someone who can be put to the test … and by test, I mean an obstacle course that represents life and its challenges!

My fellow Bachelorette, Rachel Lindsay, had a similar date during her season– and it obviously worked well for her. I figured why not take a page from her book and revamp it a little. Having Rachel and Bryan there to lead this with me was really fun for everyone that day, and I think it is only fair to restate the question: What that mouth do!? Even though the obstacle course was meant to be lighthearted and fun, it was designed to still show me who these guys are. What I was really looking for was a positive attitude, who was having fun and who was still excited to be hanging with me at the end of it and not focused on the “win.” As you all saw, Lincoln literally took the cake and won the challenge. Now, the word winning might be a stretch — it’s still up for debate if he won fair and square. What do you guys think? Either way, for me this was the first time that I really began to feel tension between the guys. I wasn’t sure then if it was just a competitive spirit or more –—but of course that evening revealed everything.

Heading into that evening I was really excited to continue what I thought had been a really successful fun date. I was able to connect and really make strides in my relationships with a handful of men. I loved hearing how close Chris was to his family, especially strong women. Then there was Jean Blanc, who was able to really express himself in a way that resonated with me. I felt like we were on the same page and that is why I decided to give him the group date rose. What I needed that night was a man who was 100 percent invested in me, and he made me feel so hopeful for the future.

Now, let’s take a moment and talk about the picture. Lincoln expressed that I bring out the best in him … but obviously he was able to bring out the worst in Connor. What started as a creative way to let Lincoln know he made the day really fun and special for me quickly turned into a nightmare. I don’t condone lashing out in a physical way like Connor did, but I also disagree with how Lincoln was rubbing my personal gift in everyone’s faces. I left having my guard up with both men, and that is not how I wanted to feel starting the week.

After the issues from the night before, I was really looking forward to a one-on-one date with a guy who I knew wouldn’t be any drama. Blake was just that guy. Something you guys didn’t see was our limo ride over to the warehouse. We must have laughed the entire way and bonded over our love of peanut butter and the show Friends. Our connection, while so far over 90s TV shows and snack foods, felt like it was natural and easy — I loved it.

Usually it’s me planning the dates, but Chris Harrison had something up his sleeve and took all the planning off my hands. I was going into this one just as blind as Blake, which bonded us in a way that made me feel like no matter what, we were in this together. When Blake and I were handed the jumpsuits and sledge hammers I thought to myself, okay, Chris, you have our attention. Then we walked into the warehouse and I thought to myself again, oh wait, NOW you have my attention. What a cool freaking date. Besides meeting Lil John and Turning Down for What (what does that really mean?!), my favorite part of this date was the fact that Blake and I seemed like a team. Smashing away my past felt insanely therapeutic, but doing it alongside Blake (someone who I’ve been excited about since After the Final Rose) made me feel so optimistic about officially putting history behind me and looking ahead to the future.

That evening, Blake opened up about how he too was blindsided by heartbreak in his past. It felt for the first time in this journey, that I found a real connection with a man that I could see a solid future with. He had my back and I had his, and that was a refreshing feeling.

The next day was my second group date and another physical test at that. This time it was dodgeball — but not your average dodgeball. I decided to up the ante and play on trampolines to see what these guys were really made of. Since I’m not athletic whatsoever, I recruited the help of dodgeball champs Wakime, Jonathon and Sydney to walk us through some drills. They taught us the 5 Ds of the game: dodge, dip, duck, dive and dodge. Watching the guys dodge and dive to and fro while being bossed around by these hardcore kids was everything. I’m not going to lie, I was slightly afraid of them (the kids, not the guys). Those three did not take it easy on us. Poor Ryan was pelted in a most uncomfortable place, meanwhile Christon was going straight for me! The best though was hearing Wakime yell “TRASH!” at the men, and it will forever be ingrained in my memory. It became a running inside joke between the guys and me.

Heading into the Ultimate Bachelorette Dodgeball Championship, I knew the key to success was dressing the part. I made sure to get them into florescent short shorts, that, if I’m being completely honest, wished were a little more retro and not so gym class. However, they still looked pretty darn fabulous. It also wouldn’t be a Bachelor event without the help of the legendary actor, announcer and dodgeball enthusiast Fred Willard. Hearing his hilarious and witty commentary really brought me back to the good ol’ dog date last year where I first met him. That man is fiery, and I’m glad he came back this time around to give some good jest.

The tournament started off strong but quickly turned into a sweep as the green team dominated almost every game. But man, could Leo in pink play. He really kept the pink team hanging on by a thread. I could tell he was so in his element and loving the cheers coming his way. It was really fun to see him stand out and he definitely had my eye that day. And not just my eye … but what you didn’t see (or hear) was “YAZ daddy!” coming from a very taken women in the crowd with me. Part of me was jealous, like hey, these are my boyfriends, but really it was so funny, so shout out to her for making me laugh! Even though Leo was definitely MVP, the green team took the brass balls trophy and off we headed into the afterparty.

Heading into that evening I couldn’t help but have a little anxiety from what had gone down on that first group date afterparty. I was over the drama and was really hoping there wouldn’t be any more surprises — but of course I was wrong!

For those of you who don’t know, Tia was with me on Arie‘s season of The Bachelor last year. We were instant friends, bunkmates and she was someone who I could turn to when times were tough. Sharing the stage with Tia when I was announced as Bachelorette was an empowering feeling for all strong women. My relationships with my friends are lifelong, solid and unbreakable. So, when Colton revealed the truth about his previous relationship with Tia, I was frustrated, shocked and left with a million questions. My mind raced and I didn’t know what to believe or how to handle the situation. Was it true? Why would he lie about something like this? Was Tia aware he was here? How does she feel? Is Tia okay? Is Colton a player? Can I trust him? My friendship with Tia (and all the strong, amazing women in my life) mean the world to me. So really, the first thing I wanted to do was send him straight home. But the fact of the matter is I was really drawn to Colton for reasons other than just our chemistry and how impressed I was with his charity for Cystic Fibrosis. I felt like there was an invisible pull, something that in my gut told me to not discount our spark.

I did my best to not let my confusing surprise with Colton consume me that evening and tried to put focus back into the amazing other guys at the after party. That night I feel like I was really starting to peel back the layers of John from successful tech developer and discovered that he has his own home cooking show that he shares online as a fun hobby. Garrett continued to make a really great impression on me and made me confident in knowing that there was something special between us. Then there was fashionable Wills. I absolutely loved talking with Wills that night. Seeing him get emotional about his parents really moved me. I felt like I could see a future building with him, and it made my decision pretty easy when I thought about who to give the group date rose to.

The second cocktail party arrived before I knew it. It was hard to believe it had only been one week because it felt like so much craziness had already happened and feelings were already developing. The guys could sense that this was an emotional week for me and did everything they could to pick up my spirits. I loved that Clay taught me how to touch down dance that lead to scoring a kiss. I think the first night I really connected to him as a person, so I like that he wasn’t afraid to turn up the romance and take things to the next level. I really appreciated Connor apologizing and owning up to the picture drama from the start of the week. I believe in second chances and I wanted to give that to Connor. And to be totally honest it was kind of fun to toss the picture of Connor therapeutically into the pool and officially drown the person he was on the date and focus on the man standing in front of me. I think one of my favorite moments from that evening was Jordan showing up, or should I say, down, in his underwear. I know most of the guys didn’t appreciate this gesture, but I had to hand it to Jordan, he beats to his own drum, and I found that endearing. The only problem was trying to figure out where to stick that rose when I offered it to him.

Going into my second rose ceremony, I was overcome with emotion and really questioning if I was cutout to handle what it means to be the Bachelorette. I was truly conflicted in the decision to keep Colton and I remember making myself sick over the potential to jeopardize my friendship with Tia. I made the decision to keep him one more week but not feed anymore into our relationship until I was able to speak with Tia … you’ll just have to wait and see.

Next week has one of the most shocking and dramatic twists I could never have anticipated. One goodbye leaves me absolutely heartbroken, and the tension continues to build between two guys, leaving one of them in a pool of blood. You’ll have to wait until next week to see everything unfold and how my relationship with Colton takes an unexpected turn and what this ultimately means for my friendship with Tia.

Thanks for reading.

Xoxo, Becca

The Bachelorette airs Mondays at 8 p.m. ET on ABC.

   The Bachelor
   The Bachelorette!">"High Hopes for Blake:" Sharleen Joynt on Episode 2 of The Bachelorette!

“High Hopes for Blake:” Sharleen Joynt on Episode 2 of The Bachelorette!
Jun 5, 2018 Sharleen Joynt  


I knew I would like Becca as Bachelorette but she’s exceeding even my (sometimes unrealistic) expectations. At every possible turn, instead of sliding on that glass slipper with a bit too much ease, she instead reminds us that she’s just like us; she’s joked about usually living in yoga pants and repeatedly emphasized what a normal girl she is. When the guys were changing into their tuxes on that first Group Date, she laughed uncomfortably, as much at herself as at the situation: “Like, I don’t know what to do right now!” (I really related to this as that’s how I’d feel in that situation.) While remaining optimistic and a downright incredible sport about the process (particularly considering what was done to her last season), she straight-up called it out as being “reverse dating” and said that it led her to feel an attachment to Arie that she wouldn’t feel so early in real life. She said she didn’t think she would cry “till Week 5,” indicating she knew full well that tears were on the horizon, and also that she was wrong to think it was something she could predict. She is fully herself and is aware she isn’t the first, and won’t be the last, to be in these temporary glass slippers. It’s these constant little fourth wall-breakers and that self-awareness that remind us, like the page of an Us Weekly issue: “Stars, They’re Just Like Us!” Becca represents that to me. She’s the Everygirl, the woman you’re friends with, the one you especially root for.

As far as Episode 2s go, this one didn’t let me down. Both Group Dates were the right mix of competition and kitsch, which is, in my opinion, how they should be this early on. Blake’s 1-on-1 struck the perfect balance between humour—smashing things with abandon in a massive warehouse sounds SO satisfying (whether or not they pertain to your ex, honestly)—and romance.

What did let me down? A couple of the guys. Namely, Lincoln and Connor. Believe it or not, I err slightly on Connor’s side in the whole framed photo debacle (I’m at about 40 Lincoln, 60 Connor). Don’t get me wrong: think it’s a red flag that Connor not only possesses such a rage mode, but further that he allowed himself to go to said rage mode over something so indisputably trivial. (Seriously, who gives a crap if Lincoln’s photo is facing out for the guys to see?) But I saw Lincoln’s behaviour as even worse. It’s one thing to place the photo in a reasonable spot—on a table, any table—and entirely another to become next-level obnoxious about it when others express irritation. His bizarre peacocking of that damn photo felt almost like the result of some social ineptitude rather than actual pride over what it represented. And it’s not like the photo sat on the table for just a few minutes and Connor suddenly threw it out the window. Several attempts were made to make the photo face downward, or to ask Lincoln directly to move it, and he continued to provoke the others until Connor snapped. It came to the point where it was less about the photo and more about one-upping each other.

Lincoln seems to be competitive to the nth degree: The ITM of his “WIN WIN WIN” mantra (this was likely frankenbitten somewhat but I think the gist remains the same), plus the fact that he just couldn’t help rubbing it in the others’ faces. But let’s reverse the roles: given how competitive Lincoln clearly is, if someone else had won and rubbed it in his face, I don’t doubt he would’ve been deeply irritated, too.

Look, all this aside, if when Lincoln ran to Becca for a new framed photo, he had taken even the slightest bit of responsibility and admitted that, hey, maybe he had been a bit obnoxious and kinda/sorta asked for it, I’d be #TeamLincoln. But his post-photo-throwing behaviour was that of a petulant, whiny child who couldn’t fathom how he had caused what ended up transpiring. And the crying was downright strange. Overall, they both behaved like children. Connor should’ve just been the bigger person and shrugged off Lincoln’s juvenile display (like every other guy there was able to do!), and Lincoln should have been more conscious of the others and just let Connor (or whomever) make the photo face downward and left it at that. Neither of them were capable of proving to be the bigger person in that scenario. As Becca said, it’s very early (too early) on for there to be this sort of drama. Here’s hoping these boys grow up.

On a lighter note, Jordan is turning out to be even more hilarious than I could have hoped. His one-liners remind me of those of Canuck Daniel Maguire’s; you’re not quite sure if he intends to be as funny as he is, but it doesn’t really matter. I think my favorite quote of his from last night is: “If we could take an IQ test, and I’m certain I would pass it a little higher than you’d think a male model would.” I’m still not entirely sure where he stands on the ingenuinity scale, but for now his entertainment factor is so on point that I don’t really care.

My frontrunners after this episode are as follows…
The Bachelorette season 14 episode 2: A photo of Bachelorette season 14 contestant Blake in a maroon short-sleeved shirt and grey pants

(Photograph: Courtesy City)

1. Blake, 28: I think a lot of us have high hopes for Blake and so his predictably strong 1-on-1 was very welcome. There’s something very endearing about him; he has the magic of a good-looking guy who maybe doesn’t know how good-looking he is. He comes off as sincere and modest, never entitled or pretentious. The daytime activity of their 1-on-1 was definitely more about Becca and he correctly took a backseat, playing the supporting role in her walk down memory lane (and the subsequent sledgehammering of it). In his ITMs about the date, he stressed how natural it was to be together (the exact thing Becca noted about him on Night One) and how “perfectly” they “meld with each other.” He gets bonus points for using such a great verb!
Bachelorette season 14 episode 2: A photo of contestant Garrett in a Blue suit jacket and white shirt

(Photograph: Courtesy City)

2. Garrett, 29: As per Bachelor/ette frontrunner formula, the First Impression Rose recipient was on the down-low this week. Garrett was still a bit omnipresent throughout the episode in terms of commentary, and his 1-on-1 time during the Group Date was prominently shown. We all know Garrett is going far this season, and he’ll be getting a 1-on-1 soon.
The Bachelorette season 14 episode 2: Contestant Wills in a white button-up shirt and navy blazer

(Photograph: Courtesy City)

3. Wills, 29: Wills is a dark horse based on Night One; his limo exit and conversation were hardly shown—they were part of a montage of Becca talking about the respect she had for the men and how comfortable they made her feel—and all we saw of their 1-on-1 time was about his Harry Potter tattoo. But he and Becca shared a sweet Group Date conversation where he got emotional talking about his parents and where they shared what seemed like one of the strongest kisses of the season thus far. Wills beat out Garrett for that Group Date Rose, which is no small feat. Wills kind of came out of nowhere this week but I now think he’ll be going quite far.
Bachelorette season 14 episode 2: A photo of contestant Colton in a black leather jacket and light pink t-shirt

(Photograph: Courtesy City)

4. Colton, 26: I think Becca is well within her right to take issue with Colton dating Tia. This is actually something I’m particularly stringent about in real life so I can admit there may be some bias here, but in my single days, I was uber conscious to not date anyone my friends had dated. I realize that ex territory is a grey area, and of course if the connection is powerful and undeniable and potentially worth souring a friendship over, it can take precedence. But for the most part, in real life and with all the options online dating can provide, I think it’s usually poor form to incestuously date around the same social circle.

Therefore, I find it very suspect that Colton just so happened to date Tia before coming on Becca’s season, and I for one really would have liked to hear how and when he met Tia and whether or not he was already in talks to come on this Bachelorette season at that time. Did they date right after Tia finished filming Arie’s season, or during the airing of Arie’s season? This information is pretty important information considering there’s no question Tia was a candidate for Bachelorette herself. It’s hard to imagine that Colton wasn’t at least consideringauditioning for the show, if not already partway through the casting process for this season when he and Tia were chatting each other up. If he was indeed already in talks to be on the season (which is likely), and Tia was indeed in talks for Bachelorette (which is also likely), it goes to show that pre-season couple strategizing may not only be limited to Bachelor In Paradise

Obviously, this is all up to Becca and she felt inclined to keep Colton anyway, so perhaps these details don’t matter. The fact that she kept him despite this unsavory information could mean a lot for their relationship, but I maintain that I still see more Bachelor potential in Colton than romantic potential between him and Becca.

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http://www.flare.com/bachelor/the-bachelorette-season-14-episode-2-recap/

bluwavz wrote:Rachel's recap: https://www.usmagazine.com/entertainment/news/rachel-lindsay-the-bachelorette-becca-kufrin-needs-to-slow-down/

Sharleen's recap: http://www.flare.com/bachelor/the-bachelorette-season-14-episode-4-recap/

Welcome to the Bahamas! I couldn’t wait to get this week and all the dates started. With each day this journey gets more serious, and this week especially took on a whole new meaning because hometowns were right around the corner. I’ve said it many times before, but family is the most important thing to me, and I want a partner who feels that same importance in meeting family. I couldn’t believe that pretty soon I’d be doing just that … and four times! By this time, I was falling for multiple guys, so I knew that heading into this week (with no rose ceremony) I had to really evaluate each relationship before giving out a rose.

My first date of the week was with Colton. The Bahamas is a beautiful place, but half of that beauty is found in the clear warm ocean that surrounds the Islands. So what better way to explore than a luxury catamaran?! Colton always seemed put-together and buttoned-up, so I was really looking forward to seeing a more relaxed version of him. Little did we know too much conch would be involved. When Action pulled up on that bright yellow boat, I knew we were in for a treat. Not only did he teach us how to get deep to find the conch, but also how to find the pistol … or as he calls it, the Bahamian Viagra of the sea. Getting that conch was a lot harder than expected (sorry for all the innuendos, Mom), but it was seriously the most fun afternoon. By the end of the day, we were exhausted from diving into the ocean and so ready to dive deeper into our relationship.

Heading into my evening with Colton, I was eager to continue the amazing time we were having sans seafood. When he opened up and told me that he was still a virgin, I was surprised. I took a moment to myself to think. To me virginity is a meaningful thing, and I respect him for holding that so sacred. That being said, I am taking this process very seriously and I know Colton is as well. It was something I needed a moment to think about, with hometowns and eventually fantasy suite right around the corner. I would never judge someone for being a virgin. In this journey, though, I have multiple relationships, and so I wanted to be certain that Colton and I had a future before continuing a physical and emotional relationship. I know how much weight that holds. I was confident that what Colton and I had was real, and so I was ready to take our relationship to the next level at our own speed. I was glad that Colton was able to be so vulnerable with me. And giving out that first rose for hometowns made me feel so hopeful with what the next week meeting families would bring.

Moving into my next date of the week with Garrett, I was really excited. Our first one-on-one back in Park City was one of the best first dates I’ve had, and I only hoped that the momentum would continue. Garrett always made me feel so vibrant and youthful, so this date would be the perfect day to keep those feelings alive. Being on the seaplane was breathtaking. Flying above the crystal blue water was a moment I’ll never forget. I knew Garrett would appreciate it since he loved adventure. All day long we played in the sand and swam until our fingers and toes were prune-y. Garrett even built me a sand castle dream house that we would live in one day! It was so creative and really made me see how great of a Dad and husband he could be. I still had questions about what he was ready for, though. Was there more depth to our relationship other than the chemistry? That evening Garrett was able to open up and give me so much more than I expected. He was able to be so open about his past relationship, and I so appreciated his honesty. But when he continued to tell me he was falling in love with me, I knew in that moment I saw a future with him as well. This was one of the best dates of my life and I couldn’t wait to meet his family.

My last one-on-one of the week with Blake was a long time coming. I remember being in his shoes last year and getting that very first one-on-one and wondering when my next date would be. It’s a nerve-wracking, intense feeling watching others go on dates week after week, wishing it were you. I always felt so confident in Blake and our relationship, but this date was leading into hometowns … so I wanted to be absolutely sure. Now, what you didn’t see was that when Blake and I first met up we went horseback riding along the beach. And after our first meeting ever on After the Final Rose, I couldn’t take anyone other than Blake, could I?! But the best part of our day was the beach party with the BAHA MEN!!! Now I have to say, I never knew Blake could dance like that! Apparently, he took swing-dancing lessons, and now I’m a firm believer that every man should. Fellas, take it from me — ladies love it. I have never felt more alive on a date. Heading into that evening, I was ready to continue the connection we started from our very first date. I knew if what Blake was feeling for me was like what I was feeling for him, then that third rose was definitely going to be taken after the night. To hear more about his family life and how difficult his parents’ divorce had been for him tugged at my heartstrings. I’m glad to have made him feel comfortable and at ease to share that. When he told me that he loved me, I felt like my heart was about to leap right out of my chest. What he didn’t know was I was starting to feel the same exact way about him.

Going into the last date of the week with just one more rose to give out weighed heavily on me. After going through the treacherous two-on-one date back in Vegas, I knew I’d have to put on a brave face for Leo, Wills and Jason … but as the day went on and we played beach volleyball, we all had such a great time, I didn’t know how I could make the choice! After a pretty close game where I proved my athletic abilities weren’t totally useless, I was excited to sit down with each guy so that I could find clarity to help me make the tough decisions that were ahead. Wills and Jason brought so much to each conversation and I knew in my gut then and there that what I had with Leo just didn’t match the feelings I felt with those other two men. When I sat with Leo, I knew that we were on the same page. Leo is a funny, kind and gentle man. He was someone who I could see a future with, it was just a little hazier than with some of the other guys left. I knew at that point that it was time for us to part ways. It was hard saying goodbye to him, but I knew that our lives just weren’t aligning quite like both of us had hoped. He was one of the most respectable men and it was probably the most mutual breakup I’ve ever had. Leo became someone important to me and someone who I really hope to continue a friendship with.

Heading into dinner that night, I hadn’t felt that torn or anxious this entire journey. I didn’t know how I would make the decision to give out that last rose, and I was praying that I would find the clarity and make the right decision. Both Wills and Jason brought different emotions and feelings into the evening. Wills by nature is very open and wears his heart on his sleeve. Jason is much more pragmatic but brings so much charisma and passion to our relationship. I was being pulled in two different directions. By the end of the night, it came down to who would I still think about if I sent one home. Who could I not see myself without, and who I felt ready to meet their family with. I knew then that it was Jason. But saying goodbye to Wills after all he opened up about was by far the hardest goodbye I’ve had yet. Wills was someone who I could laugh with, nerd out with and who I felt so comfortable being myself with. He just wasn’t the one for me at the end of this. While our goodbye was truly heartbreaking, it gives me joy to confirm that ladies… this isn’t the last you’ll be seeing of him. Yes, Wills is heading to Paradise! To all my girlfriends who will be heading to Mexico this summer, keep your eyes out for Wills, he’s one of the good ones!

Up to this point, The Bahamas had been my favorite week of the journey because I felt like the drama was FINALLY behind us and I was truly able to focus on romance and the future. But as one might predict, I’m just a little too quick to assume drama is behind me for good. Four families open their homes to me, but not everybody is ready to welcome me to the family. Next week, I find myself defending my relationships to potential in-laws while making the hardest decision yet of saying goodbye to one more amazing man. But the biggest shock is that Tia comes back to drop a bomb that shakes up the entire foundation of my relationship with Colton. Trust me, you won’t want to miss a moment of it. Colton, Garrett, Blake, Jason … off to your hometowns we go!

Thanks for reading and until next week!

xoxx,

Becca