Bachelor 22 - Arie Luyendyk Jr - SM Media - *Sleuthing Spoilers* - #5

Stone_Hedge wrote:@bluwavz This might be the first time Arie will be held accountable with cameras no less. He might learn the hard way that he’s accountable for the way he acts no matter how he feels . It’s not like Arie and Lauren will be blissful from Tuesday on. There’s going to be adjustments couples make. If he never learns accountability , he’ll never maintain a healthy relationship .
Jmo

I agree with this post completely. Unfortunately, to me Arie is showing a lack of empathy and I don’t know that you can learn that. At 35/36 years old if you have never developed empathy you probably never will. JMO.

missnana wrote:Or Lauren is plain stupid who is easily manipulated by men like Arie? She has a lot of maturity to accomplish, and she seems very naive by the fact that she took him back immediately considering his shady reputation and how he treated her and Becca.

I just really dislike when women have this mentality "he won't do that to me because what we have is special"   . BS! it never ever works that way.

"When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time." - Maya Angelou

ALL IMO

And Lauren has heard Arie’s version of what happened but it’s different when you actually hear him propose. If she is seeing some of this for the first time I can’t imagine she won’t be shocked and hurt. Maybe she won’t watch it. Not sure how they can’t watch it, it would kill me not to watch it.

@LeapofFaith I think TPTB and Hulu are ready to move on from this season and don't care anymore  
When I watched the proposal on Hulu I thought it was a ton better than the the clips I've watched where the sound and music is very low so I think it will come across more romantic etc, especially leading up to the FRC. 

Arie telling Becca he chooses her not only at FRC but every day from then onward at FRC and then dumping her is something else though   I just can't take him seriously and whatever he says to Lauren on camera it will be the same old thing imo. I'm ready for (hopefully) Becca's season to start and move on from Arie

AllAboutLove wrote:@LeapofFaith I think TPTB and Hulu are ready to move on from this season and don't care anymore  
When I watched the proposal on Hulu I thought it was a ton better than the the clips I've watched where the sound and music is very low so I think it will come across more romantic etc, especially leading up to the FRC. 

Arie telling Becca he chooses her not only at FRC but every day from then onward at FRC and then dumping her is something else though   I just can't take him seriously and whatever he says to Lauren on camera it will be the same old thing imo. I'm ready for (hopefully) Becca's season to start and move on from Arie

Rolly wrote:

missnana wrote:Or Lauren is plain stupid who is easily manipulated by men like Arie? She has a lot of maturity to accomplish, and she seems very naive by the fact that she took him back immediately considering his shady reputation and how he treated her and Becca.

I just really dislike when women have this mentality "he won't do that to me because what we have is special"   . BS! it never ever works that way.

"When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time." - Maya Angelou

ALL IMO

And Lauren has heard Arie’s version of what happened but it’s different when you actually hear him propose. If she is seeing some of this for the first time I can’t imagine she won’t be shocked and hurt. Maybe she won’t watch it. Not sure how they can’t watch it, it would kill me not to watch it.

Besides what Arie might have told her, he literally dumped her for another women. How much more does it take for her to realize that he is treating her like crap? How do you love somebody and break their heart for someone else, not only that but propose to that person for marriage?! She came back from overseas alone, and heart broken in the plane. Even after reassuring her a million time, he still broke her heart. At this point it's ridiculous to give Arie any chance at all imo.

If after everything he made her go through emotionally and mentally, she still somehow falls for Arie's crap, then she has no one but her self to blame later on. JMO

AllAboutLove wrote:@LeapofFaith I think TPTB and Hulu are ready to move on from this season and don't care anymore  
When I watched the proposal on Hulu I thought it was a ton better than the the clips I've watched where the sound and music is very low so I think it will come across more romantic etc, especially leading up to the FRC. 

Arie telling Becca he chooses her not only at FRC but every day from then onward at FRC and then dumping her is something else though   I just can't take him seriously and whatever he says to Lauren on camera it will be the same old thing imo. I'm ready for (hopefully) Becca's season to start and move on from Arie

Question though. Has any couple ever said they had to reshoot the proposal for better lighting etc? Maybe this was b-roll or maybe the live unedited version we’ve heard about . It’s just so cray ! Jmo

bluwavz wrote:

Aria wrote:

bluwavz wrote:I don't think Lauren is fake either. She really does believe she's in love with Arie, otherwise I don't think she would've taken him back immediately, gotten engaged to him weeks after his last failed engagement, or planning to move in with him after the show (assuming RS is correct). And except for the fact that I think Arie's FOS with claiming to be in love with two women, I don't even think he's fake either and I'm definitely not one of those folks who believes in the theory that this was all scripted and Arie was in on it all.

@bleuberry I'm honestly not sure if he sees it coming. He did say the finale would be fun for him to watch back and he's said he thinks it will be exciting for viewers to watch. That doesn't sound like someone who's aware or afraid of going under the bus.

All JMO.

I don't think Arie is in it either. He's stupid and selfish, but I don't think he's a cruel, evil person, which you would have to be if this was scripted. I think it was just that he really did think he loved both girls and Becca was "easier" and he was taking the advice that Sean gave him (pick your best friend) and taking into consideration what his sister said, about not being with someone again that he couldn't have conversations with. And I think he was just always going to think the grass was greener because he had that concern the whole season, so it became a chicken vs. egg thing.

I don't think Arie knows what's coming! I think people never really attacked him for going after Emily when she was an engaged woman and most just saw it as a sign of his sincerity, so I think that in his mind, people will just see this as some big romantic gesture and forgive him once they see that Lauren and he have the greatest love story in the history of the universe. IMO.

I pretty much see it the same way. For me if you have to come up with an elaborate theory to explain what happened then that's probably not what happened. He's a flawed person and he made mistakes. It's just as simple as that to me. I struggle with believing he was in love with two women but I think that's because he just comes off less emotional than Jason and Benji about it all.

I don't think he's cruel either. Even with Us Weekly saying he was unsympathetic and not kind in the breakup I think that could be explained by him just genuinely being unaware of how he's coming off. I don't think he's meaning to be an azz to anyone. He just really doesn't get it. Believing anything else just makes me feel yucky.

All JMO.

IMO you make some great points. 
He doesn't get it. 
Brad told Deanna the night before the FRC that (sorry paraphrase) tomorrow as going to be a great day. 

Stone_Hedge wrote:

AllAboutLove wrote:@LeapofFaith I think TPTB and Hulu are ready to move on from this season and don't care anymore  
When I watched the proposal on Hulu I thought it was a ton better than the the clips I've watched where the sound and music is very low so I think it will come across more romantic etc, especially leading up to the FRC. 

Arie telling Becca he chooses her not only at FRC but every day from then onward at FRC and then dumping her is something else though   I just can't take him seriously and whatever he says to Lauren on camera it will be the same old thing imo. I'm ready for (hopefully) Becca's season to start and move on from Arie

Question though. Has any couple ever said they had to reshoot the proposal for better lighting etc? Maybe this was b-roll or maybe the live unedited version we’ve heard about . It’s just so cray ! Jmo

Yes, couples have had to reshoot parts of the proposal. I don’t think what has aired has ever been a reshoot. I think most of the proposals shown are the first take and then they occasionally splice in a secondary camera shot that wasn’t from the original.

I heard they had to do a lot of re-takes with Ashely and Ben F after she made him get up. I heard it was brutal. Who knows what's true anymore.

I think Jason made a mistake. Arie otoh his behavior is not that of someone who just made a mistake since Arie has a history of moving on from one woman to the next while he still with someone (this is cheating imo) so to me that pattern of behavior seems to have continued and thus isn't just a mistake imo if it's something he has done before and doing again. 

Arie's own ex Sydney predicted that he would have a hard time choosing one girl and she was correct imo. His SM activity this season alone indicated he hasn't changed his ways and made me side-eye him back then with his liking Lauren's pics while he was engaged to Becca. Add in the things Arie has said as well and he comes across as someone who is self-absorbed and self-entitled and lacking in empathy imo. 

At best Arie is selfish azz imo and at worst, if he followed some script then that's just cruel and honestly terrifying to think that a guy would be willing to do such a thing. Thinking about another's feelings when in a relationship and not just being totally selfish, cheating (whether emotional or physically) is not something I see as just a one-off mistake or Arie just lacking self-awareness but basic decency and respect for others and himself. Arie will have to prove he has changed and is genuine before I buy what he sells. jmo

@AllAboutLove That's why I don't think this was all scripted. If there was ever a season where another switch was going to happen then it was going to be with Arie. I know some don't think his past matters but I think it explains everything that happened this season. I think a lot of leads repeat their past patterns on their own seasons IMO.

@bluwavz ITA. If it was scripted Arie then that makes him callous and cruel imo. I also believe past behavior often predicts future behavior and with Arie I think this is the case. If Arie dumps Lauren while moving onto the next woman (or cheats on her) it won't be because he just made another mistake imo it's because that's his M.O. and pattern of behavior. Hopefully that doesn't happen but it won't surprise me at all if it does given how Arie has behaved already. 

IDK. I think I'm just done with excusing men and their crappy behavior towards women. In a patriarchal world, where men get away with doing the bare minimum, I just can't defend Arie's behavior in how he went about it or how little empathy he has shown, even talking about how "fun" it will be to watch  It's proven now Arie definitely proposed to Becca so it's not a case of him dating both of them but more like Arie just being Arie and getting bored and moving on to the next. I can't stand Jef but seems like he and the rumors about Arie were correct. jmo