Ben Higgins & Jessica Clarke Higgins - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #2

wait i am confused doesn't he have a girlfriend? or is this the new prerequisite to be the bachelor? you have to have a girlfriend before starting bach then dump her before you're announced?

Most of the past leads especially in recent years were single before becoming the lead (Ben included) so no, having a girlfriend is not a requisite

Ben is just "dating" though and keeping his side-piece on the down low because he's still so broken every day that people don't believe he truly loved and wanted to marry Lauren (even though HE was the one to call off the wedding on his HEA show)  

I just can't with Ben and his "woe is me" story

And this is what really bugs me ... Ben wanting to convince people around that he is "that guy he wants to be seen as".

Just be the guy and let other people see for who you really are ... because we all like to think with our own mind last time I checked. Who are you trying to convince? Yourself maybe? Does the consciousness speak? Actions speak louder than words "they say" and maybe Ben has a hard time adjusting/accepting his past actions/behavior, because you can't erase it or change, so he is trying to change the narrative ... only that putting himself in the "victim" position who has to defend himself how "sincere, noble and correct" he is ... is making me

ITA. I didn't care for Ben saying he still finds himself defending Lauren but then goes on to defend/talk about himself and how hard it is for him, etc. I find it manipulative on Ben's part to make it seem like he's looking out for his ex-fiance when all he is doing is playing the victim and looking out for himself. jmo

I just don't get it. The guy doesn't do anything. What has he done since his last stint? A little of this and a little of that. And TPTB would even consider this as a desirable lead? Ugh. He can't figure his own life out yet.
Cast a canine or feline and I'll watch before Ben.

He was never my type physically but I thought he was "cute" on Kaitlyn's season and his own. He's not even that old and he is not aging well imo. He made a mess of his season IMO and post show, I see a very different person than than the persona he presented in his two prior stints. I couldn't stomach a season of him whining about his heartbreak over Lauren. Hopefully the next 'ette season will have a few great guys as contenders for next lead and he can fade away to obscurity. JMO

GuardianAngel wrote:

Stacia620 wrote:http://www.buddytv.com/articles/the-bachelor/should-bachelor-star-ben-higgi-67745.aspx

Please no Ben 2.0

I voted no.

SHOULD BEN BE GIVEN A SECOND CHANCE?
Yes, he deserves one.
42%
No, it would be awful.
45%
Yes, but only on a spin-off.
13%
Total Votes: 38

Sorry for quoting myself. I was able to vote again on my work laptop. Not many votes but here is it. Strange that the Yes and No are now reversed even though the Yes was a lower % last night.

SHOULD BEN BE GIVEN A SECOND CHANCE?
No, it would be awful.
48%
Yes, he deserves one.
40%
Yes, but only on a spin-off.
12%
Total Votes: 57

I voted that he'd be awful. I really think he has some issues and it's not about Lauren but something he should have worked on prior to Kaitlin's show. I don't believe he was ready to be lead the first time let alone now. I just think it would be a boring season with almost zero chance of a good outcome so hope for almost anyone else. JMO

I voted no just because Lauren doesn't deserve to be dragged through THAT again. She'd be his sl from the start, and would again get the sm idiots to target her.

As for him 'defending Lauren'. She doesn't need any defending. Shea living her life, seems really happy, and seems to have moved on. He could easily be just honest and defend himself without using his fake chivalrous act to get to defend himself. Also, why does it matter any more if people believe he loved Lauren on not? Who is he trying to convince, himself?

I think, much like Andi, Ben was more heartbroken about failing than losing Lauren. He was on his way to dethroning Sean and now he's just another Bachelor lead who couldn't make it work with his F1. He just can't seem to get over the fact that people don't view him as special anymore. It's kind of sad how much he cares about public perception. He'd rather lie and hide things and sound like a politician 24/7 than simply be himself and let people make up their own minds about him. It just seems exhausting. JMOAA.

Hmm...this is a BEN discussion thread. 
The discussion is not going to go down that road. 
Want to discuss another cast person--we have a thread for that.

He mentioned he can't, or won't be ready for BIP, for feelings and his workout regime. I feel it is more because that show is "beneath" him and he wants Bach. Again. Barf.