Ben Higgins & Jessica Clarke Higgins - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #2

Chgohighlife wrote:

Cocoasneeze wrote:I am 100% sure, that Ben had his doubts about getting married before he signed the dotted line to do HEA, yet ge still persuaded Lauren to do it, and the public humiliation and heartbreak was just wrong. He's free to live his life, do what he wishes, but him claiming to want to settle down in Denver, he was not ready, and Lauren got crucified for not wanting that life, when it was Ben all along. It was hard for Lauren to settle with Ben, when he was not ready.  All Imo.

I'm sorry. Lauren does not look like the victim you describe and I do not believe she is, IMO. Not even a little bit. She appears to have handled her fame and resulting 1.2M Insta followers who support her shilling and income, just fine, IMO.

https://www.instagram.com/laurenbushnell/?hl=en

Zero sympathy for a great girl and a job well done. JMO

Not once did I call Lauren a victim. It still doesn't mean Ben didn't mislead her, lead her on, and contributed to her very public humiliation. That's all on him. He wasn't even ready to live together with a woman, let alone marry anyone, yet he allowed Lauren to pack her bags, uproot her life, and then he wasn't ready to meet her half way. Acknowledging that doesn't mean Lauren is a victim. She's doing great. Great for her for moving on fast with a man who seems better for her, she was free to do that after Ben pulled back from their engagement on a reality tv show.

As for letting Ben be free and live his life, I'm not stopping him, I'm only commenting on my view of him being a fake, user, and hypocrite. None of that is stopping him from living his life. We comment on many other Bach cast and their social media posts, Ben isn't an exception. Jmo

Seeing Ben half naked in that IG post made me realize that since the breakup Ben has only been getting on average between 20-40k likes on his posts. He usually averages less than 200 comments now too. The tub picture has over 70k likes and 1700 comments. It's obvious Ben is trying to stay relevant now that he has to work harder without the attention of Lauren.
I can see this trend continuing for him now that he doesn't have a job and is relying on his entertainment gigs and ads on IG

@FMG2015 IA posting the picture of himself on premier night imo is another example of trying to stay relevant.

Chgohighlife wrote:I respect your opinion. IMO, public people are subjected to public response. The public buys and makes money for you. The public criticizes and hurts your feelings. Lauren decided to be a public person and she reaps the benefits so, she suffers the downside. IMO, Always a two way street. She also appears to follow the adage "the best way to get over a man is to get under another one". IMO, she found Ben's replacement in record time and he's a cutie. No harm. No foul. Free Ben. JMO

As sleuthed here the relationship was pretty much over when the HEA finale aired, so I don’t think she moved on that quickly at all.
Also, turning a long term friendship into a long term romantic relationship isn’t exactly what I would call “getting under another man”.
All JMO of course.

@blueblues
I agree. If anything she was more than patient. I'm happy for her. IMO she deserved so much more.

blueblues wrote:

Chgohighlife wrote:I respect your opinion. IMO, public people are subjected to public response. The public buys and makes money for you. The public criticizes and hurts your feelings. Lauren decided to be a public person and she reaps the benefits so, she suffers the downside. IMO, Always a two way street. She also appears to follow the adage "the best way to get over a man is to get under another one". IMO, she found Ben's replacement in record time and he's a cutie. No harm. No foul. Free Ben. JMO

As sleuthed here the relationship was pretty much over when the HEA finale aired, so I don’t think she moved on that quickly at all.
Also, turning a long term friendship into a long term romantic relationship isn’t exactly what I would call “getting under another man”.
All JMO of course.

I remember Lauren stating she met her current guy via Tinder before going on the show so, I simply am not prepared to place as much blame on Ben as outward appearances might suggest. And yes, I could have stated it more delicately but, she did exactly what I said, two months after her break-up she was public with her new guy and as you stated, she knew him before Ben so no one knows when they actually reunited and what the terms of that relationship were or when, IMO.

I am not criticizing Lauren, I have said I actually admire her ability to move on quickly. IMO, she actually derived significant benefit from her alliance with Ben and I don't blame either of them for where they are and how they are, today. JMO

Yes it absolutely takes two to tango but imo I think ben is going to keep getting passes if no one holds him to account. Except for these pages, he is hardly ever criticized. I mean ABC compared him to Jesus! The two ILY's he was just being honest but the lie about the furniture was misunderstood. Just because Lauren landed on her feet doesn't excuse bad behavior on Ben's part - and I don't think he could even bear up under one iota of the criticism Lauren got - some of which he needs to own as his doing.

Cjr0204 wrote:Yes it absolutely takes two to tango but imo I think ben is going to keep getting passes if no one holds him to account. Except for these pages, he is hardly ever criticized. I mean ABC compared him to Jesus!  The two ILY's he was just being honest but the lie about the furniture was misunderstood. Just because Lauren landed on her feet doesn't excuse bad behavior on Ben's part - and I don't think he could even bear up under one iota of the criticism Lauren got - some of which he needs to own as his doing.

I respect your right to be a solid Lauren fan. She's happy. Me too.

I think Ben is a nice guy... a little weird but nice. Something about him exudes..."I'm hiding  part of my personality cause I like to keep some things to myself". Every now and then he peeps out from behind his thoughts and reveals what really he's about, IMO. There's just something "shady" about him.  JMO

And the next time he decides to curl his toes over the end of the tub and sprawl out with his gorilla like legs, for goodness sakes...find a tub large enough so the level of water can cover it all up.

why the sudden hate on Ben?
not saying he wasn't seeking fame like Lauren as well through the show.
Lauren was the one trying to be famous on IG, it's clear her intentions were: partying, clothes, lip injections, coachella life instead of prioritizing her life with Ben first, but that's all imo.
I've never been a fan of Lauren but not saying Ben is innocent either, but I'd take Ben over her anyday.

This is Ben Higgins Discussion thread. 
In a discussion thread members are allowed to discuss the good, the bad and the ugly. (within site rules)
This is not a fan thread.

wishesfireworks wrote:why the sudden hate on Ben?
not saying he wasn't seeking fame like Lauren as well through the show.
Lauren was the one trying to be famous on IG, it's clear her intentions were: partying, clothes, lip injections, coachella life instead of prioritizing her life with Ben first, but that's all imo.
I've never been a fan of Lauren but not saying Ben is innocent either, but I'd take Ben over her anyday.

Lauren got trashed for all of this on here, sm, articles and other forums. She got called every name in the book, while Ben was just the poor guy wanting to settle in Denver, find a wife to live this simple life with him. He didn't like the sm attention, he just wanted a cute church going wife to do charity work with. He got praised for going back to his real job. Some of us never bought that. He is Imo a reality show professional looking for his shot in the entertainment business, and now that's all looking like the real Ben. Nothing wrong with that, but his Imo fake poor me attitude when it fell apart with Lauren, and her getting called out a attention seeking media hungry trash, and Ben got the poor genuine simple life loving guy rapport was just wrong. So, while I'm nit hating him, I don't hate any of these people, he's getting called out as a fake reality tv loving, attention seeking, media hungry, not so simple normal life loving, eternal victim playing Ben, and its just fair. Jmo.