Vanessa Grimaldi & Josh Wolf - Bachelor 21 - Discussion

Maybe the problem is that since Vanessa was not familiar with the former Bachelors she did not realize she would end up with Nick being the second coming of Jake Pavelka!!! ***IMO***

IMO Nick is nothing like Jake Pavelka.

mprssdbyu wrote:

Alanna wrote:What are you supposed to text back to a nude??

Who knows but apparently you can't leave out that you sent heart emojis, too.

- IMO - I don't know why she would emphasize that...but, maybe she wants to shout it out to the world that Nick does love her when the public and the media are saying their relationships are all fake...it is her insecurities on how people see her love life and not the insecurities on whether she feels if Nick loves her or not... - JMO -

@Skates That's exactly the way I took it too. She felt he wasn't letting the world know that he loves her - with all the noise about him and his sincerity, I can understand her feelings.

singanewsong wrote:Maybe the problem is that since Vanessa was not familiar with the former Bachelors she did not realize she would end up with Nick being the second coming of Jake Pavelka!!! ***IMO***

- IMO - I am not sure how Jake is, but I think love can sometimes change a total a**h*** to a sweet loving guy...and, that would mean bringing out the best in the person out of love...in the same way, a sweet guy can be transformed to a total a**h*** due to life changing situations......I don't see Nick as that, but he can come off as aloof, I think, sometimes...he is also very blunt and honest, some people can't handle honesty...he probably needs to learn how to be tactful though...I really admire Vanessa for her tactfulness in handling situations like that... - JMO -

Errr... i took that as a cute moment than anything else. We all have different perceptions of this though. What many of you considered cute in their ellen tube interview i thought was rude/annoying on nicks part.

I think a really good point was touched on above. Vanessa said she maybe watched 2-3 eps of andis season and it struck her how close nick semmed to his mom. Maybe compared to the other guys that season perhaps. But when I think of nick from his 4 seasons, him being close to his mom doesnt fall im the top 10 things i would think about him.
Back when i had doubts of her being a winner, i thought in that part of the date she was projecting a bit.

happydays wrote:

Mochaginj wrote:

chrissy1295 wrote:Just saw Vanessa's IG post. New beginnings... That last bit of hope I had for a reunion is now gone. I might have to follow @bluejay271 's lead and unfollow them for a bit

I don't see it as lost hope. I too have strong feelings that they belong together and will find each other again. But I don't think it's something that will happen in the very near future.  I think there is some soul searching, for probably both parties, that needs to be done first.  And to do that I think they do need to think of this as 'new beginnings' IMO it doesn't mean they're going to end up apart in the end. IMO Now their paths have been crossed, I think they need to try at life separately for now to see if they find they can't be apart.  Time will tell

IMO no chance they get together. And I think that's a good thing for both of them. Relationships are meant to be easy. Honestly, following them wasn't all that enjoyable because I felt that I constantly had to make excuses in my head for why they could be very happy together contrary to social media and interview evidence.

Without going into it deeply, there were many instances where I thought 'Damn Vanessa is strong and secure' when Nick would say things when he was promoting the bachelor. And even some things he said afterwards.

Would want something better for both of them.

       -  IMO  -   Relationship is not meant to be easy...because easy relationships in most cases never last...easy because they click, maybe...but, in the long run...it may start to get boring...hardships in a relationship makes it worth lasting...in most cases, people don't really appreciate their partners, if the relationships come too easily...every relationship has to go through hardships...easy could be due to different factors--relationships can be easy, if the person is pretending or not being herself/himself to just make the relationships work...being submissive just to keep the relationships smooth sailing is another reason...which is not a healthy way of keeping a relationship...   -  IMO  -

       " Every relationship gets boring and it will get boring after you’ve been together for years. It’s always fun in the beginning. It’s always exciting when you’re getting to know each other. It’s always thrilling to chase one another. Eventually, it gets hard. Eventually, it becomes difficult. Eventually, it drains you. That’s when people tend to quit and goes looking for someone else because the “spark” is gone and they want to feel wanted, admired and be loved again. But listen, that’s not how it’s supposed to be. No, that’s not how it works. It doesn’t have to be that way. Even if it does get boring, that’s when you’re supposed to remember why you’re with that person in the first place and it’s never too late to find that happiness that you both once found together because the truth is, it’s always been there and it never left. Even when it feels like feelings are fading, that’s when you’re supposed to know how much this person means to you and what losing them would be like because being able to love someone even when they’re being hard to love shows that your feelings never left. Even when it feels like you’re done, that’s when you’re supposed to realize that no matter who you’re with, its always going to get “boring” so you might as well be with someone whose willing to love you unconditionally and won’t ever give up on you.  ― Teddy Nguyen "

" True love doesn't happen right away; it's an ever-growing process. It develops after you've gone through many ups and downs, when you've suffered together, cried together, laughed together. ― Ricardo Montalban "...People give up too easily in relationships, thus divorce and separation rates among couples are increasing...

       -  JMO  -

Bingo!

Skates wrote:

       -  IMO  -   Relationship is not meant to be easy...because easy relationships in most cases never last...easy because they click, maybe...but, in the long run...it may start to get boring...hardships in a relationship makes it worth lasting...in most cases, people don't really appreciate their partners, if the relationships come too easily...every relationship has to go through hardships...easy could be due to different factors--relationships can be easy, if the person is pretending or not being herself/himself to just make the relationships work...being submissive just to keep the relationships smooth sailing is another reason...which is not a healthy way of keeping a relationship...   -  IMO  -

       " Every relationship gets boring and it will get boring after you’ve been together for years. It’s always fun in the beginning. It’s always exciting when you’re getting to know each other. It’s always thrilling to chase one another. Eventually, it gets hard. Eventually, it becomes difficult. Eventually, it drains you. That’s when people tend to quit and goes looking for someone else because the “spark” is gone and they want to feel wanted, admired and be loved again. But listen, that’s not how it’s supposed to be. No, that’s not how it works. It doesn’t have to be that way. Even if it does get boring, that’s when you’re supposed to remember why you’re with that person in the first place and it’s never too late to find that happiness that you both once found together because the truth is, it’s always been there and it never left. Even when it feels like feelings are fading, that’s when you’re supposed to know how much this person means to you and what losing them would be like because being able to love someone even when they’re being hard to love shows that your feelings never left. Even when it feels like you’re done, that’s when you’re supposed to realize that no matter who you’re with, its always going to get “boring” so you might as well be with someone whose willing to love you unconditionally and won’t ever give up on you.  ― Teddy Nguyen "

       " True love doesn't happen right away; it's an ever-growing process. It develops after you've gone through many ups and downs, when you've suffered together, cried together, laughed together. ― Ricardo Montalban "...People give up too easily in relationships, thus divorce and separation rates among couples are increasing...

       -  JMO  -

I agree with this and I also think that Nick would agree with this as well. On the show he even said that he was looking for someone to get through things with when life inevitably gets hard. However, I just keep going back to the last podcast that Nick did with Juliet Litman when he talked about how Bachelor couples go through things that normal couples can't even imagine having to deal with...and I just think that it was clear in that moment that Nick was trying to allude to the fact that he felt helpless and bogged down by the situation and external forces that he knew were not typical variables in a normal relationship, let alone a relationship that he wanted. Everyone has their limits and I think that Nick's limit was that he didn't feel comfortable with the situation that he was in because of how comparatively strange and inauthentic it seemed to be. You can criticize him for getting in his head but at the same time, it's his life and being in a public relationship that millions of people are invested in is not for everyone--and it can be especially difficult for people like Nick who seem to value their privacy. I think that both Nick and Vanessa clearly had their struggles when dealing with those atypical variables that come with the territory of being in a public relationship and I think that the added stress of everything, combined with their personal issues/baggage (such as the living situation), broke the camel's back. Though I agree that it's normal to sometimes struggle in relationships, I don't think that it's normal to feel like the universe is against you and that everyday you are forced to fight for a relationship that, let's face it, was built on shaky grounds from the get-go simply due to the nature of the show. I think that lasting love requires a level of optimism and should be fostered in a hopeful world--it should not have to feel like it's being fostered in a world where the odds are stacked against you. I'm glad that Nick and Vanessa have broken free from having to deal with all of the stress and added pressure that came with the territory of their relationship. Now they can live their lives without that added public scrutiny...and if they one day do decide to get back together then they would be doing it with a fresh start, away from being branded as the 'latest Bachelor couple' and away from all of the 'Bachelor Break-up watch' bs. I'm sure that their relationship would still not be easy but at least it would feel more normal, authentic and real...and I think that would make all the difference.

@Bluejay271 @Skates thank you for your beautiful comments!

Can't believe vanessa's ig and latest tweet hasn't been mentioned. She might be volunteering with danielle m soon, yay!

Danielle m and vanessa have been exchanging sweet comments on each other's ig posts.

Oh, I love that idea! Funny the way things work out!