Re: Vanessa Grimaldi & Josh Wolf - Bachelor 21 - Discussion

by crunchycheeto Sun Sep 10, 2017 12:16 am

coolangel wrote:I personally don't think Nick lead her on or used her. Frankly, I don't even understand how those terms relate in an engagement. Did he tell her on the show he would be willing to move to Canada for her? No as far as I remember. Even as a fan, I knew Nick wasn't going to move and their best bet was New York. Vanessa knew this and chose to get engaged so I am not sure how he led her on IMO. And I don't want to put the onus of this on Vanessa but she was the one to come on an American show, not the other way around.

As for using her, I don't get how one is using the other in a Bachelor engagement. If anything, both the parties are gaining something and this holds true even for couples who are still together IMO. If Nick gained Vanessa's support during DWTS, Vanessa gained a huge platform for 'No Better You' which wouldn't have been the case had she been a middle-of-the-pack eliminee.

IMO It's always tempting to put the blame on the other person during a breakup to make ourselves feel better but rarely is a breakup one person's fault unless someone cheats or is physically/verbally abusive IMO. IMO N/V's breakup seems to be the run-of-the-mill breakup due to incompatibility and personality differences IMO. I like them both and want to continue liking them both so I hope they don't resort to playing the victim and the blame game.

All JMO

I have to agree with everything you said, especially the bolded part.

by Skates Sun Sep 10, 2017 12:21 am

whit90 wrote:
singanewsong wrote:
whit90 wrote:IMO I think it is pretty immature of Vanessa to tweet what she did , liking post that shades , and starting following Jen. I really thought she was above this but maybe some of what some have said about her is true. All I see is Nick went to one of his best friends wedding which he had no control over who else was invited. He had a great time and looked very happy for Sharleen and Andy. He probably spent most of his time with Chris imo and left alone. I really liked Vanessa but have lost some respect for her. I know she is hurting but that is no excuse for the shade she is giving Nick. He would never imo do that to her . JMO

***Edited***

Now there is Vanessa who was engaged to Nick gave up everything for him for love and marriage to end up with a guy who has commitment issues - (he told Andi a day after his first engagement he knew something wasn't right.)

Vanessa liking a few tweets is amateur hour compared to Nick the professional love victim.
As I stated this was my opinion and I have every right to it even if others disagree. I am not going to go into what happened between Andi and Nick this is Vanessa thread. I understand that both are probably hurting right now . I also said I do not think that Nick will shade Vanessa because I truly believe he has a great amount of respect for her and loves her. I just think the timing of this is wrong. All Nick did was go to one of his best friends wedding looking very happy and good. I do not think he should of stayed at home because Vanessa would see him happy. They both need to move on and enjoy their lifes. I just do not see the need of Vanessa shade toward him and all of a sudden following Jen. I just think it is immature at this time and I really thought she was above this. I still like Vanessa but like I stated lost a little respect for her. I truly hope the best for both.
JMO IMO

- IMO - Everybody speculates that Nick has done nothing wrong...but, nobody knows the real story behind their break up...thus, I am not going to react to whatever Vanessa is doing right now...maybe something more complicated has taken place between them...and, Nick really has done something to break her heart...Vanessa may have just been trying to follow people from Bachelor Nation without any intentions of hurting or shading anybody...is Nick following Jen (??)...if that is the case, maybe it is just a friendly thing for her to do so...to acknowledge Jen by liking her tweet... - JMO -

by happydays Sun Sep 10, 2017 12:27 am

The fist bump reply to jen though was definitely shade imo.

If you look at vanessa's beyonce related tweets, it sounds like something went down between the two of them. Its all a matter of perspective in terms of how to interpret.

Vanessa has been smiling all the way through the relationship that nick looked clearly miserable in. I'm all for letting her not be her best self during this difficult time.

by Skates Sun Sep 10, 2017 12:31 am

Brill wrote:I don't know what happened or who's fault it was, if any, but I have to say if the break up didn't initiate with her then she will be hurting a lot!! I'm not going to jump on any band wagon that wants her to be this prim and proper lady and just suck it up and show what a sweetheart she is. I'm sure at some point she will turn the corner and maybe be, what some think she should be. In the mean time IMO she has my vote for getting him out of her system.

Way back, many moons ago, I was Vanessa and it hurts like heck especially if it wasn't your idea. She just needs time. Time heals all wounds. Now I'm not blaming Nick but let's be real, he never had to do much to change his life for her and I'm sure right now she resents that she did as much as she did do. She gave up a lot to try and work on their relationship. Let's just say I feel for her and know exactly what she is going through. :broken heart: JMO
Vanessa I am one fan who really feels for you.:yougogirl: Just remember when one door closes another one opens.

- IMO - Either way even if Vanessa has initiated the break up due to Nick's being non-committal in the relationship...Vanessa has mentioned quite a few times previously, engagement is sacred for her...for her it also means marriage...if Nick is not looking at getting married...then it doesn't make sense for her to stay on being engaged...since it basically defeats the purpose in the first place of her wanting to be married and having a family...the hurt would have been deeper and extensively hard in both cases, specially since Vanessa seems to be more invested with this relationship--regardless of whoever has initiated the breakup... - JMO -

by whit90 Sun Sep 10, 2017 12:37 am

@Skates I never said that Nick was not in the wrong . I just stated that he shouldn't feel quilty going to one of his best friends wedding. Nick does not follow Jen anymore. I guess I was just shocked when I read the tweets this morning. I have always rooted for this couple and it made me very sad when they announced their split. I like Vanessa but I will always be Team Nick. I truly feel for both of them because I think they are hurting maybe more Vanessa than him. I do think that they truly did love each other and gave it their best shot. I think at the end they both probably realized they wanted different things in life. I wish both of them the best and hope one day they can find that person who fulfills their needs and wants. JMO

by Skates Sun Sep 10, 2017 12:43 am

whit90 wrote:@Skates I never said that Nick was not in the wrong . I just stated that he shouldn't feel quilty going to one of his best friends wedding. Nick does not follow Jen anymore. I guess I was just shocked when I read the tweets this morning. I have always rooted for this couple and it made me very sad when they announced their split. I like Vanessa but I will always be Team Nick. I truly feel for both of them because I think they are hurting maybe more Vanessa than him. I do think that they truly did love each other and gave it their best shot. I think at the end they both probably realized they wanted different things in life. I wish both of them the best and hope one day they can find that person who fulfills their needs and wants. JMO

- IMO - I also believe that they still love each other, but both have realized that they both want different things in life...I don't really think compatibility is the issue...it is easier to give up a relationship when compatibility is the issue...but, heading to different directions after being in sync for a while can be really frustrating, most specially to the person who is in the deeper end... - JMO -

by happydays Sun Sep 10, 2017 1:10 am

Vanessa posted funny ig story

by Mgrissom Sun Sep 10, 2017 1:40 am

It's so good to see Vanessa with friends. Family is great, but I want her to go out and have fun and meet someone else. I know it's soon and she is hurting, but she did give up a lot. I also hope she gets the same hosting/modeling opportunities she was getting in LA. No Better You is her foundation, and hopefully that will continue as well.

During the show when Nick said he wanted someone that would give for the sake of the relationship and he had found himself having to give up more in previous relationships - I thought at the time, that is his perspective and I bet the other girls did not feel that way.

I think Vanessa ended the engagement, because she did not see it leading to marriage. Nick is just dabbling in things for a career and does not seem to have a plan. Although she liked what she was doing in LA, she will have the same opportunities in Montreal. I think it was also her way of finding out if he truly loved her. They parted on good terms and if she was what he wanted, then he would come to her. Obviously he is more into his fame and LA life - that reality hurts.

by Jane781 Sun Sep 10, 2017 1:58 am

I think the first bump is 100 percent shade. No questions. Which would lead me to believe the other stuff is as well. Vanessa is well aware people are watching her right now and will read into everything. My main issue with it all is the contradiction between their joint statement and her statements to People with the statement fist bumping Jen makes. Speak your truth if that's what you want to do, but don't say one thing and then hint at another. JMO.

And while on one hand it seems unlikely that it's related to anything from last night, the timing of the blocking and the tweets sure is coincidental.

by happydays Sun Sep 10, 2017 2:03 am

Just fyi, her snaps and ig stories are sometimes different for people tracking.

by happydays Sun Sep 10, 2017 2:04 am

Jane781 wrote:I think the first bump is 100 percent shade. No questions. Which would lead me to believe the other stuff is as well. Vanessa is well aware people are watching her right now and will read into everything. My main issue with it all is the contradiction between their joint statement and her statements to People with the statement fist bumping Jen makes. Speak your truth if that's what you want to do, but don't say one thing and then hint at another. JMO.

And while on one hand it seems unlikely that it's related to anything from last night, the timing of the blocking and the tweets sure is coincidental.

Maybe joint statement was written by nick? Does sound like his words.

by Skates Sun Sep 10, 2017 2:16 am

happydays wrote:
Jane781 wrote:I think the first bump is 100 percent shade. No questions. Which would lead me to believe the other stuff is as well. Vanessa is well aware people are watching her right now and will read into everything. My main issue with it all is the contradiction between their joint statement and her statements to People with the statement fist bumping Jen makes. Speak your truth if that's what you want to do, but don't say one thing and then hint at another. JMO.

And while on one hand it seems unlikely that it's related to anything from last night, the timing of the blocking and the tweets sure is coincidental.

Maybe joint statement was written by nick? Does sound like his words.

- IMO - It is unlikely that both of them will want to say anything negative about their break up...most couple would stick to having amicable break up to avoid stirring any media frenzies from reacting or creating more stories about them...but, actions will always speak louder than words...thus, in the end, their actions will reflect and convey the real stories on what have really happened between the couples involve...their conflicting actions and reactions to stuffs, situations/incidents that will happen thereafter...their emotional conditions during those times of sadness, pain, and grief.. - JMO -

- IMO - I think Nick is just starting to experience the real LA lifestyle...and, Vanessa has already gone through it and has graduated from those phases, thus she is more into being philanthropic than wanting to experience being in movies full time...her accepting work in Hollywood is more like means to an end in order to support herself rather than wanting to be famous and be in the spotlight... - JMO -

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