Becca Tilly & Hayley Kiyoko - Bachelor 19-20 - Discussion

To me it seems like Becca IS living her life and not holding back. If fans suspect this relationship, imho it looks like she's living it for there to be something to suspect. Just because she's not making it social media official, doesn't mean she's hiding anything. Her family and friends seem to know and approve and support her, who cares if she posts on social media about it. Jmho.

Why 'Bachelor' Alum Becca Tilley Didn't Feel 'Safe' Making Her Relationships Public After the Show (Exclusive)
https://www.etonline.com/why-bachelor-alum-becca-tilley-didnt-feel-safe-making-her-relationships-public-after-the-show

So she is still pretending that she doesn't even have a relationship since she is supposedly still searching.

She said she was happy in her personal life also watching the video was way better than reading the words buts that’s just me

Just listened to the podcast and Becca talks about Hayley with such ease now like she just naturally comes up

It’s her business. Period. I admire her nerve to keep it that way and ignore the vultures waiting to judge. Good for you, Becca.

I think it's really smart to keep her relationship private. People are brutal and I wouldn't want to deal with all the homophobic sh*t she's going to get (did anyone see all the replies from Bach fans when Ben H dared to stand up for Christian gays?), especially when you're trying to have a real relationship with someone. It's just unnecessary noise. I'm excited for when they do go public, but totally support how she's handling this right now.

I see things differently. Stop worrying about the hate filled society that we are living in and not worry about what their reactions would be. Why does anyone have to live their life according to those who may not agree with her choice.

She needs to handle it the way she feels comfortable and if they are in a relationship and she chooses not to make it public, that's her decision. As long as she is content. What I'm reading in that article, she spends far too much energy on that one negative comment among hundreds of positive ones. There's an underlying problem IMHO.

GuardianAngel wrote:I see things differently. Stop worrying about the hate filled society that we are living in and not worry about what their reactions would be. Why does anyone have to live their life according to those who may not agree with her choice.

She needs to handle it the way she feels comfortable and if they are in a relationship and she chooses not to make it public, that's her decision. As long as she is content. What I'm reading in that article, she spends far too much energy on that one negative comment among hundreds of positive ones. There's an underlying problem IMHO.

If I understand your comment, you are voicing the same opinion many of us already have. Becca does not owe public fans full disclosure on her personal life. It’s personal until and unless she decides otherwise.

On the separate topic of keying in on the one negative topic among many positive ones, I’ve seen that comment made many times by people in the public eye. IMO it’s human nature to seek approval and be hurt or offended when you are confronted with a hater. Add that to the fact that negative comments are often specifically designed to hurt, admonish, embarrass and put down the subject and they often achieve that goal with the nastiest most hate filled vitriol. IMO, the fact that Becca is successfully facing the public to do what her status requires while living her version of her best life says she’s sensitive but undaunted by the negativity. Age, wisdom and experience will add to her strength, IMO. Meanwhile, she’s winning. All JMO.

Chgohighlife wrote:

GuardianAngel wrote:I see things differently. Stop worrying about the hate filled society that we are living in and not worry about what their reactions would be. Why does anyone have to live their life according to those who may not agree with her choice.

She needs to handle it the way she feels comfortable and if they are in a relationship and she chooses not to make it public, that's her decision. As long as she is content. What I'm reading in that article, she spends far too much energy on that one negative comment among hundreds of positive ones. There's an underlying problem IMHO.

If I understand your comment, you are voicing the same opinion many of us already have. Becca does not owe public fans full disclosure on her personal life. It’s personal until and unless she decides otherwise.

On the separate topic of keying in on the one negative topic among many positive ones, I’ve seen that comment made many times by people in the public eye. IMO it’s human nature to seek approval and be hurt or offended when you are confronted with a hater. Add that to the fact that negative comments are often specifically designed to hurt, admonish, embarrass and put down the subject and they often achieve that goal with the nastiest most hate filled vitriol. IMO, the fact that Becca is successfully facing the public to do what her status requires while living her version of her best life says she’s sensitive but undaunted by the negativity. Age, wisdom and experience will add to her strength, IMO. Meanwhile, she’s winning. All JMO.

I don't know how anyone can truly be winning when they are editing what parts of themselves they can or can't show for fear of losing fans.

Sprite wrote:

Chgohighlife wrote:

GuardianAngel wrote:I see things differently. Stop worrying about the hate filled society that we are living in and not worry about what their reactions would be. Why does anyone have to live their life according to those who may not agree with her choice.

She needs to handle it the way she feels comfortable and if they are in a relationship and she chooses not to make it public, that's her decision. As long as she is content. What I'm reading in that article, she spends far too much energy on that one negative comment among hundreds of positive ones. There's an underlying problem IMHO.

If I understand your comment, you are voicing the same opinion many of us already have. Becca does not owe public fans full disclosure on her personal life. It’s personal until and unless she decides otherwise.

On the separate topic of keying in on the one negative topic among many positive ones, I’ve seen that comment made many times by people in the public eye. IMO it’s human nature to seek approval and be hurt or offended when you are confronted with a hater. Add that to the fact that negative comments are often specifically designed to hurt, admonish, embarrass and put down the subject and they often achieve that goal with the nastiest most hate filled vitriol. IMO, the fact that Becca is successfully facing the public to do what her status requires while living her version of her best life says she’s sensitive but undaunted by the negativity. Age, wisdom and experience will add to her strength, IMO. Meanwhile, she’s winning. All JMO.

I don't know how anyone can truly be winning when they are editing what parts of themselves they can or can't show for fear of losing fans.

That’s what normal people do, in my experience. They do not lay their entire personal lives bare. That is an unreasonable, generally unmet expectation, IMO.
Fans are often surprised by divorce announcements, bankruptcies, health conditions, new homes, babies born by surrogate or adopted and other news both good and bad. No one owes a complete stranger full disclosure just because they are waving a fan flag. I’m sure the people Becca loves and cares about know much more than people who have arbitrarily attached themselves to her via SM. To the latter, she pays what she owes and they buy what she sells. If they don’t like it, they’re entitled to hitch their wagons to another star. New ones are made every week or so and a few are actually stupid enough to lay their souls bare and their hearts open to interpretation by a bunch of nobodies. However, most do not IMO. They craft an image and sell it in a way that makes it seem real to an unknowing public who devours it. That’s what podcasts and magazines are designed to support - images, IMO.

@Chgohighlife I'm not saying that that is not what people do. I'm sure they do, however, to me that is not winning. To me, that is a sad way to have to live just to sell cr*p.