Becca Tilly & Hayley Kiyoko - Bachelor 19-20 - Discussion

Haha, @mindless I think being a farmer's wife would've been a wonderful, full life, but she didn't love or want him. I wonder though, if she had fallen for and committed to him, would Chris' life direction have changed? Or was he going to be self-destructive no matter what? There's no answer to that one. Sorry for veering off topic.

Being a farmer's wife is fulfilling for someone who wants that life. Becca however? She seems to really love California, her current life, her independence and her friends/family. I can't for the life of me imagine her stuck in the middle of Iowa with only Chris and his parents for company. I think if she ever moves away from California, it will be back to Louisiana. JMO.

SFoster wrote:Here are the pics from the hairdresser's instagram, from that same day.  Softer, more natural.

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bf9BcswhM9C/?hl=en&taken-by=stephteazehair
https://www.instagram.com/p/BfrJhPuB2TC/?hl=en&taken-by=stephteazehair

But still too  much makeup, imo.

She should have married Farmer Chris. Then she would still be beautiful, barefoot in overalls, with a baby on each hip, chewing on a piece of straw, or maybe driving the combine.  Rich, anyway. Free from all the procedures and styling she has to sit through day after day. That would drive me insane, tbh.  I grew up on a farm, so give me that fresh air any day.

Well I agree with you SFoster!

She would have the family she is longing for.
She was hoping for several kids, but honestly the longer she wait, the less she will be able to have.
She would be away from all the SM pressure, and Botox/fillers/fake tan she’s using so much.
She said she doesn’t like going out all the time and socializing, but she keeps partying in LA.
Becca is kind of slow pace, couch potato watching her TV shows.
Looks like she’s not career driven and just happened to be lucky to be able to do a living from Instagram and a few modeling jobs. That’s why I was laughing when she said in her interview that one of the reasons she broke up with Robert was because she wanted to focus on her “career”. Yes, sure.
Being on a farm would fit well her way of life, not worrying about socializing, her looks, a career but spend time raising kids and enjoying a tranquil life. I am sure they would travel frequently and she would have everything she’d like. She wouldn’ be bored, taking care of kids definitely fill up your schedule.

As to her relationship with Chris, I do believe she liked him a lot, and was almost there in love with him. She just needed more time. She was not ready for a proposal but she wanted to date him. She liked him enough to invest in a relationship with him. For Becca, that’s telling.
I do think there was something strong between them but it was a too short amount of time for her to be sure of her feelings. Most people believe she was not into him because not much reaction during the final rose episode, but she’s not an emotional person. Also she said in a podcast that was not surprised about the break up since she had told Chris the night before she wouldn’t accept a proposal.

I honestly don't think Becca wants a relationship. Oh, she talks the talk, but I don't think she walks the walk. I think she thinks that a relationship is what she should want because society tells us that, but I just get the feel that she is one of those people who is asexual and not interested in anyone. I think every once in a while she attempts to give it a go to satisfy people...be it family or her sm followers...but she is happier when it is al over. JMO

Maybe I am playing devil's advocate here, but I don't see Becca being happy married to Chris. He seems to have a lot of personal and legal issues. In addition, I don't think Becca loved him. JMO.

All during Chris's season, I thought he may have a drinking problem (plus media had published all those dui's he had in the past). He always had a drink in his hand on the show, but he never seemed drunk. On the other hand, I believe Becca may also had a little drinking problem. So they have that in common, perhaps! As soon as Chris's season was over, she seemed to be getting drunk with Kaitlyn that summer. In her tweets and stories, she sometimes seems drunk, slurring, etc. JMO I do think she's a bit lazy; lately, just laying around on the sofa playing with her cute little dog. Sleeping late, watching tv, playing with the dog, eating alot, drinking too much - all signs of boredom. She's not traveling like she used to. Ironically, with Chris she would have been able to travel all over (as he wanted to do), not just to one beach after another in Mexico and Hawaii. It seems she doesn't have much focus. Farming definitely gives you focus, without the pressures of LA. I think she would have had a good life with Chris, and I think she was falling for him but she seems afraid of relationships for some reason. She says her dad loves Chris and still keeps in touch with him.

On the other hand, does anyone remember right before Ben Higgins started filming, Chris was on I think it was BIP finale, giving Ben advice. And he said he had some things to share about Becca. And it didn't sound like great things. And both Ben and Chris H seemed skeptical about why Becca was on Ben's season (like they questioned her sincerity). I think that may have been related to what Chris said. I wonder what he told Ben?

Maybe it is because I am from Iowa and he has been in the news, but it sounds like Chris definitely has some long-standing alcohol issues. I guess since I have known several people with substance abuse problems -- it isn't a great thing to deal with. I certainly wouldn't want to. I wish Becca happiness in whatever she decides for her life. JMO.

Sprite wrote:I honestly don't think Becca wants a relationship. Oh, she talks the talk, but I don't think she walks the walk. I think she thinks that a relationship is what she should want because society tells us that, but I just get the feel that she is one of those people who is asexual and not interested in anyone. I think every once in a while she attempts to give it a go to satisfy people...be it family or her sm followers...but she is happier when it is al over. JMO

I think she wants a relationship, but she doesn't need one for anything other than starting a family some time down the line, and I don't think she's in a hurry. I think she'd like to have a relationship on her terms, but she's not ready to put in a ton of effort. She also seems to have this irrational fear of feeling stuck in a relationship after marriage and kids, which is something that came up in her discussion with a psychiatrist. Maybe it's because she takes marriage so seriously what with the saving herself and all, so she's scared of getting it wrong. Or maybe she just hasn't met her person yet and it'll all feel silly once she does. Who knows, but I think it's best she moves at her own pace and doesn't try to force things. JMO.

@Sprite
IA. This is how I see her.

SFoster wrote:Here are the pics from the hairdresser's instagram, from that same day.  Softer, more natural.

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bf9BcswhM9C/?hl=en&taken-by=stephteazehair
https://www.instagram.com/p/BfrJhPuB2TC/?hl=en&taken-by=stephteazehair

But still too  much makeup, imo.

She should have married Farmer Chris. Then she would still be beautiful, barefoot in overalls, with a baby on each hip, chewing on a piece of straw, or maybe driving the combine.  Rich, anyway. Free from all the procedures and styling she has to sit through day after day. That would drive me insane, tbh.  I grew up on a farm, so give me that fresh air any day.

She looks like a mannequin in these pics IMHO, I find nothing beautiful because she doesn't even look real to me.

@Sprite has it right, I'm sure. She's not interested. She could also be talking the talk because she's trying to please her parents, who are traditional. Also, to convince us she went on the Bachelor twice for the "right reasons".  Most women who wait until marriage are very young when they marry - like between 18 and 25.  It's going to be harder, the longer she waits to even start dating someone, to find a man her age who will be understanding about that issue. It's starting to be just an asexual thing, which how many men will be attracted to that?  

Sprite wrote:I honestly don't think Becca wants a relationship. Oh, she talks the talk, but I don't think she walks the walk. I think she thinks that a relationship is what she should want because society tells us that, but I just get the feel that she is one of those people who is asexual and not interested in anyone. I think every once in a while she attempts to give it a go to satisfy people...be it family or her sm followers...but she is happier when it is al over. JMO

Interesting that mention asexual because when JoJo joined her on her podcast, that's exactly how she described her. She also said that Becca has a fear of commitment. All of which, I agree.