Nick Viall & Vanessa Grimaldi - Bachelor 21 - Discussion - #2

ReneeM wrote:

sosleepy wrote:
What works for one couple, won't necessarily work for everyone. Ben and Lauren spent TONS of time with each other's families in the beginning. TONS. The opposite of seclusion. And here they are - d.o.n.e. Nick and Vanessa are older, they had Dancing to contend with, perhaps Nick just isn't that close to his family to need them out holding his hand - he IS nearly 40 years old. What I've seen so far is all good signs for them - especially if he goes to Montreal now and puts in solid time. They have to do them and do the relationship on their terms. Sometimes "seclusion" is good. It's hard to compare Nick and Vanessa to anyone post show at this stage, outside of like SeanCat and Chris/Whitney, cause Dancing just made their circumstances different from others.

BenLo is precisely my point, where everything seemed to be on Ben's terms, at first it's always all good. Maybe everything points to all good signs to you but I think him not being back to Montreal yet is a bad sign but that's JMO. And I'd be willing to bet that when he does get there, he'll stay for a week max (that's jmo though) because I don't think he'll be spending any extended period of time there. Idrc what "works" for a couple tbh, if I think the relationship is ugly, then I think it's ugly regardless of if they stay together or not. Janner is married and have a baby on the way and I think it's the ugliest relationship so ....

All JMO.

Hey... not totally disagreeing with you, girl! And might come to full agreement. But I'm just waiting to see what Nick does now. Maybe he'll actually stay with her for most of her duration in Montreal. That would be nice to see. It's all future, so I'm not condemning him for something we don't know will happen yet.

I am sorry but I don't know why a couple in their 30s need to be spending a certain amount of time with their family and if they don't spend that amount of time then it's a negative.

To me that's just really wierd if a couple need to be doing that and I say this from experience and I am very close with my own family so it's not about that at all, it's about the couple and what works for them and as close as family is, what is more important in a relationship is the two people in that relationship doing what works for them and Vanessa and Nick have categorically stated that that is exactly what THEY are doing and having a healthy balance IMO is what is good.

Also, once again stating that something is on his terms only is false. That may be an opinion but it is not fact according to Vanessa herself what they are doing is on HER terms as well and what SHE wants too. Just like I chose to live in the USA because it was what I wanted to do not because I was doing something on my fiance's terms.

I'm a fan of Nick, but I get the feeling that he would not want to spend a whole lot of time in Montreal. He could very well prove me wrong. All jmo.

Also, let's keep the focus on this couple. Please.

I don't think Nick will spend a lot of time in Montreal either but why didn't he go with Vanessa to her class play on Wed?  Seems like he could support something close to her heart and make it back to L.A. with  plenty of time for a non-competing DWTS rehearsal.

^I agree with this. I don't want to compare with other couples from the franchise...but...I have seen cases where one party rushes home from work in another state to be with the other - even just for 2-3 days, then flies back out again for work. I don't think money is an issue with these two. But to me, it would have made a statement on the relationship had Nick gone with Vanessa to Canada. I know of a couple in the franchise for whom the guy literally flies from west coast to east coast to just pick up his fiancé to bring her over to west coast just because he doesn't want her to travel alone. So yeah, I am thinking he's not gonna spend a bunch of time in Canada. I would love to be proven wrong. But it would have been a nice gesture to escort her back home, since this is the first time she's coming back after such a long time. But I guess they are doing things on their terms based on what works for them. So I hope it works.

Vanessa's brother had been in LA. I wonder if maybe they flew home together.

That's great that one couple does that. Great. And no way in hell would I be doing it. Just saying. Everyone is different. We all have our own plusses and minuses.

ReneeM wrote:He's nothing like Shawn & they're nothing like the Boothestowes IMO. The show ended over a month ago & Nick still hasn't been back to Montreal? Ok then ...

I will agree that they are nothing like Shawn and Kaitlyn and IMO I do not want them to be. Nick just got done with DWTS and is joing V in Montreal next week. When else was he suppose to go ????? They were both working on their projects and still are . No whining about anything Bach related like K does. JMO

I actually think it's nice for a couple to be away from families in the beginning of their relationship so they can focus on each other and build strong foundation, but that's just me.
Besides, Vanessa herself didn't rush back home to be with her family after Nick left DWTS. She wasn't even home for Mother's Day! Gasp! Who knows, maybe Nick wanted to go but Vanessa told him NO, wait till you have more free time? Remember the #baggate? We just don't know every single detail of their lives.

If I learned one thing about V over 10 wks on the show, it is that she wears her heart on her sleeve and from the outside looking in, I see someone very happy and content with whatever arrangements have been made between the two of them. V is clear (VERY) IMO where Nick wants to call his home base. Even I was clear on that before show ended. I think she enjoys the ribbing he gets from interviews about not choosing Montreal. I did notice that a speech therapist from LÀ left a comment on her IG basically trying to recruit her into special needs programs in LA county. V liked the comment as did several of her friends. I do know that V often comments on his mom's IG. As far as V's family, they are private or absent from SM. I couldn't begin to guess how he communicates with them. If I did it would be a BIG assumption on my part. All this to say, if V felt slighted by Nick it would not be a secret. N is a great communicator and as long as he loves V, she will accept nothing less than the expectations she has for her fiance. All JMO

whit90 wrote:

ReneeM wrote:He's nothing like Shawn & they're nothing like the Boothestowes IMO. The show ended over a month ago & Nick still hasn't been back to Montreal? Ok then ...

I will agree that they are nothing like Shawn and Kaitlyn and IMO I do not want them to be. Nick just got done with DWTS and is joing V in Montreal next week.  When else was he suppose to go ????? They were both working on their projects and still are . No whining about anything Bach related like K does. JMO

No comparison on my part to this couple.  I'm not ReneeM, but to answer your question whit, he could have gone this week for a couple of days.  I just think he could show support to her project since he's no longer competing. But, hey everyone is different. He had a car to buy and had to get matching shirts with Maks. Priorities.