Dean Unglert - Bachelorette 13 - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

Cocoasneeze wrote:He's way too young and immature to be the lead. Are our options really this skim, Dean or Peter? Meh. Imo

Doesn't look like any of them are good to be the lead. No wonder that Ben H is being considered.
The way Dean handled problems in his relationship with his father shows that he is not mature enough to handle problems in relationships and will be dragging his baggage into new relationships. He is not ready for serious relationships IMO.

albean99 wrote:I hope Dean and his dad can work things out.

I also hope it will happen rather sooner than later.
Good they were able to meet and talk during taping the show, it is just a beginning. I'm wishing them to see and understand each other the way they are. I hope Dean will be able to see that his dad was overwhelmed after his mother’s death and was not able to handle things better. At times grown up kids have to be able to be there for parents and understand what they are going through.

One of my hardest life transitions was learning that my parents were not infallible. That in their humanity they make mistakes too. As a grown up, I had to accept this and decide if I could or could not maintain a relationship with the one difficult parent. It grows and changes. Hopefully Dean will learn and grow, he can not change what his father did or did not do and IMO he now needs to decide if he can accept what his father can give now or not.

From a personal perspective, embarrassing someone and almost ambushing them on camera is a bad way to try to get what you need. Most will either cave and not mean it or react as Dean's dad did. Again all JMO.

http://m.eonline.com/news/867844/sorry-but-dean-unglert-is-probably-not-going-to-be-the-next-bachelor

Dean is the one that's jumping from Kristina to DLo or whatever he's doing in that triangle according to BIP spoilers. Sounds like he may have gotten caught up in lust himself.

I appreciate the fact that he recognizes he isn't mature enough or emotionally ready to be the Bach rather than faking it just for the fame and other perks that come with the gig. It is a refreshing perspective imo.

I think Dean has some things to work out and some more growing up to do before he's ready to get married. At least he has an awareness in that EOnline interview, that he may not be ready yet to settle down. As far as his family issues, I think that he needs to get to a place where he can see his father for who he is and accept his limitations. His father did what he could after his wife died and not everyone is able to be there for their children emotionally. It's not an easy journey to get there, though. But if Dean can come to terms with who his father is and accept it, then he will have gone a long way to getting rid of a lot of the pain and hurt.

I hope he can work things out with his father, but it's not always possible. He does seem to have a relationship with his siblings. My heart really went out to him watching his hometown date. It's painful to see a private family drama play out like that on TV. But maybe something good can come out of it.

I have heard about him on BIP and what went on. That was surprising after what I saw of him on Rachel's season. He really does have some maturing to do!

What gives me pause it is seems that none of the 4 siblings were able to get closure. I hope they lean on each other if their paternal figure couldn't give the expected result. From what I gathered, it is a whole disjointed mess, so they don't likely lean on each other emotionally. JMO. I may be completely wrong...

Nativenewyorker wrote:I think Dean has some things to work out and some more growing up to do before he's ready to get married. At least he has an awareness in that EOnline interview, that he may not be ready yet to settle down. As far as his family issues, I think that he needs to get to a place where he can see his father for who he is and accept his limitations. His father did what he could after his wife died and not everyone is able to be there for their children emotionally. It's not an easy journey to get there, though. But if Dean can come to terms with who his father is and accept it, then he will have gone a long way to getting rid of a lot of the pain and hurt.

I hope he can work things out with his father, but it's not always possible. He does seem to have a relationship with his siblings. My heart really went out to him watching his hometown date. It's painful to see a private family drama play out like that on TV. But maybe something good can come out of it.

I have heard about him on BIP and what went on. That was surprising after what I saw of him on Rachel's season. He really does have some maturing to do!

@nativenewyorker Nice to see you posting!

Nice to see you back @Nativenewyorker!

Thanks to kasha and Mia for the welcome back! It's much appreciated!

I have been trying to catch up on everything. Reading about BIP and all the drama. I am going to wait before passing judgment on Dean's actions in BIP. I want to see for myself. Someone suggested that he might have feelings for both women and is trying to figure it out. Or the other explanation is that he is playing them both. I just don't understand why both women would be willing to see one guy. They do have a say in what they do. It's not all on Dean. DLo has the advantage of proximity in being in the same city.

I initially didn't think that much of Dean's looks, but he grew on me. I wasn't sure if I was going to watch this season after a season of Nick Viall! I thought maybe it was time for another break from this show. So I skipped the first few episodes. I went back the other night and watched Episode 4 to see Dean and Rachel's 1-on-1 date. I was moved to tears watching him talk about his mother and her struggle with breast cancer. It was obvious that he loved her very much. Rachel handled it beautifully. Sometimes death can bring families closer, but in this case it seems to have torn apart this family.

I kind of wish that Dean didn't do BIP. That show is such a train wreck. He could come out of it looking really bad. TPTB can also edit people in such a way to make them look really good or really bad. So I hope that Dean doesn't let it all go to his head. I liked him on Rachel's season and would not want to see him do things he might regret.

Kels0012 wrote:What gives me pause it is seems that none of the 4 siblings were able to get closure. I hope they lean on each other if their paternal figure couldn't give the expected result. From what I gathered, it is a whole disjointed mess, so they don't likely lean on each other emotionally. JMO. I may be completely wrong...

I actually think you make a lot of sense. I remember Dean's sister telling Rachel how he was strong for them. She cried and said that she felt guilty for being so weak. It sounds like Dean had to step up and be there for his siblings. The father seemed to have a bad time if it himself. He got emotional when he spoke about his late wife at the hometown date. He wasn't able to be there for his children. I think he may have a lot of guilt over it. The mother seemed to be the glue that held the family together.

I really hope that Dean and his brothers and sister can be there for each other and have a good relationship. It is really a mess. They need each other.,