Ben Higgins - Lauren Bushnell - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #6

CS and Lauren?? No!!!! She's too attractive for him. Just saying.

Here's a first look at Ben and Lauren on Dumb and Dumbers (IMO) show, and his mention of it in a tweet this morning.

https://twitter.com/benhiggi/status/829696426405920768

I will not watch that show especially after watching HEA. It was garbage. Ben and Lauren really love the spotlight. It's all about the $$$$$$ ! All I see is green, green, green no matter what!

If they do break up I guess the announcement has to be after the twins show airs??

I also think Ben and Lauren are probably still trying to sort through their issues. Lauren posted recently on her instagram 'We ain't perfect but we tryin'. I think she could have been referring to their relationship. Not all relationships are perfect.  I saw a post on social media about why relationships are so difficult, interesting read - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/margaret-paul-phd/working-on-relationships_b_1965598.html

After reading this it lead me to an article about rejection and abandonment, and it gave me an insight into understanding Ben's actions and their relationship a bit better. In their TV show Happily Ever After (HEA), when Ben and Lauren sat down with a therapist, Ben said to Lauren, I need to know you are my biggest fan and when life gets rough or hard that you make me feel better about myself then I already feel. I need the reassurance to help me, probably more than most people. He explained that the first time he felt this was when he was in second grade, when he was all alone while everyone was playing and he felt he had nobody. I think he probably felt abandoned and rejected and has a fear of this. Matches the traits identified in this article - http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-14543/4-ways-youre-not-taking-care-of-yourself-emotionally.html

I think it also helps explain his behaviour in the first episode of HEA. After giving advice to Jojo on the bachelorette, Ben turned to Lauren and the camera caught him asking Lauren whether what he said was ok. It was a bit strange, but it makes a bit more sense now. I think he felt he wasn't good enough and needed reassurance from Lauren to hear her say it was ok.

I can sort of see why their relationship may require more work than some. "Love is a process of acceptance". Maybe this also means accepting and loving oneself so that you believe you are also good enough and better. http://www.aspiremag.net/love-love-others/#.VyFOrlGS1Uw.twitter

I love them more for being real and for allowing us to understand and see them better and for continuing to work on their relationship.

Newt wrote:CS and Lauren?? No!!!! She's too attractive for him. Just saying.

IMO it goes back to Dr House: 5s end up with 5s, 10s with 10s, etc but there is wiggle room if someone has money or someone gets pregnant. CS has the money so I can see them very happy together personally. And he likes thin blondes so that's a match there too IMO.

I think Ben has deeper issues that probably no one even knows about. The unlovable schtick and always wanting reassurance from people is a bit overwhelming. He needs to accept that its ok to say the wrong things at times. Own up to them and keep it moving. Lauren doesn't have to pat you on the back all the time.  jmo

I never got a vibe that Lauren is interested in a guy with more money. Am I missing something ?? What has she done to make people think that she will be choosing guy with more money over anything else.Just because she is interested in fashion, makeup and travelling around ?? She may not be over the top rich but I think she was doing well for herself before bachelor too. It's not that she suddenly started having interest in travelling post bachelor . IMO there is no other contestants from her season who have travelled in and out of country more than Lauren pre bachelor .As far as her fashion and makeup are considered , she hasn't gone over the top than any others. The brands she is associated is most girl these days can afford . She never has gone and got herself anything that are high brands , I m sure she has some money to do that now . So I just don't get why people think she will be willing to go for rich guy . JMO

I've never seen Lauren as some gold digger either. She loves that lifestyle of high-end clothes and makeup and soul cycle and traveling...but they all do. I don't see her as much different from Jojo or Sharleen or Andi in that regard, IMO. They are all able to provide for themselves. Lauren seems like she's someone who just wants a guy that's all in with her, which Ben never was, IMO.

I thought these traits were pretty spot on about Lauren.

AQUARIUS TRAITS

Strengths: Progressive, original, independent, humanitarian
Weaknesses: Runs from emotional expression, temperamental, uncompromising, aloof
Aquarius likes: Fun with friends, helping others, fighting for causes, intellectual conversation, a good listener
Aquarius dislikes: Limitations, broken promises, being lonely, dull or boring situations, people who disagree with them

http://www.astrology-zodiac-signs.com/zodiac-signs/aquarius/

This whole Chris S. thing started with a tweet of his a day or two ago saying he was at the same resort in Mexico that Lauren was just at. He asked if she was still there. That's when Elan chimed in and said she's engaged. I really doubt Lauren is interested at all in CS, just my opinion.

Ben needs to stop over-thinking every little thing and just let life happen. I can't really blame Lauren, he would drive me nuts. IMO

@aurora Good post. Very interesting. People have a variety of issues for one reason or another.

It's like telling someone who's depressed, give your head a shake, move on. Sometimes it's not that simple.

@cila51290 What are Ben's traits/characteristics?