Bachelor 21 - Nick Viall - Media SM Vids - Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers* #4

I'll be popping in and out you know hahaha

Can someone join my sentences they're uploading separately. Thank you!

sdmom wrote:Here's the link to the preview: volleyball date gone wrong
http://abc.go.com/shows/the-bachelor/video/most-recent/VDKA3663064
Sorry I don't know how to embed a video, but Vanessa and Dani M were crying.

Thanks. I'm sorry but that was very annoying! Boo hoo! I don't get enough time with Nick. Ugh!

atem wrote:

sdmom wrote:Here's the link to the preview: volleyball date gone wrong
http://abc.go.com/shows/the-bachelor/video/most-recent/VDKA3663064
Sorry I don't know how to embed a video, but Vanessa and Dani M were crying.

Thanks.  I'm sorry but that was very annoying!  Boo hoo! I don't get enough time with Nick.  Ugh!

She's just frustrated, period. IMO The gossiping comment caught my attention.

atem wrote:

sdmom wrote:Here's the link to the preview: volleyball date gone wrong
http://abc.go.com/shows/the-bachelor/video/most-recent/VDKA3663064
Sorry I don't know how to embed a video, but Vanessa and Dani M were crying.

Thanks.  I'm sorry but that was very annoying!  Boo hoo! I don't get enough time with Nick.  Ugh!

I agree. I have always, from the very first moment really wanted to like Vanessa cos she's of all people Nick's F1 but she's always been the kind to be dominating and to always draw the optimal attention to herself due to her demeanor (not because she is asking for the attention but because she is dominating and she sucks you in).

She's also very passionate and leads with her emotions which in this situation is likely exasperated but I find her dominating, needy and dramatic ...and frankly, annoying - def not as likable as I would like. Her approach, tone of voice etc. all came off as even a tad entitled from the very first episode when she said she was "shocked" she didn't get the FIR - girl there were 29 other women in that group that could have blown Nick away - what makes you a special snowflake even if there was chemistry that you'd be shocked!

I can very much see how she is a version of what Nick wants and he'd likely enjoy the dramatics cos he loves the passion and the ups and downs of a relationship -- I can see him wanting to keep things interesting/unexpected which she can bring to the table. She's not as intellectual/cerebral and I don't think she'll be the one grounding him, rather he'd be catering to her (she's more emotional so she'll add the dramatics rather than having a calming effect imho). And maybe that's what nick needs, someone to focus on so he can rid himself of his self-absorbed neurotics. I don't see her bringing the intellectual challenge which I think he loves and craves -- the kind of verbal sparring he enjoys/ed with Andi, Taylor, Rachel.

I can understand why others might have completely different opinions from me and I am not writing this to convince you but to share my view as I have the freedom to on this forum but I've watched closely putting spoilers aside really wanting to like her and sadly for me I'm really not as excited about her as I was hoping I would be once Nick's F1 rolls around....

Even when I try to as I watch them I find myself liking the immediate emotional intimacy but there was no build up and I find it one dimensional. I find her to be the kind of suck him in. I do imagine we haven't seen many sides to her and obviously this weird process brings out strange sides - she is likely loving and caring as well as giving so I'm hopeful he'll have a great reciprocal relationship....but for watching the show its' a bit of a bummer cos it's been a long long road with this Nick Viall on the show. All the best to her/them regardless as I continue watching and hoping I'll start to enjoy them more -- but based on this episodes so far I don't think they'll be one of my fave couples unfortunately for me.

I haven't seen that clip yet, but I don't mind Vanessa being a bit domineering, since that's exactly what Nick needs IMO. He's always been into ballsy women, so I can't even imagine him with someone perfectly pleasant. Basically, the nicer the woman, the less interested he seems. If Vanessa rubs people the wrong way at times, then that's just perfect, for Nick. JMO.

^^ I understand what you're saying even though I'm still a fan of V... I personally take her actions as confidence and I love that in a woman... as for being emotional, it's so hard to tell what is normal in this environment (for example, I loathed watching Sharleen on JPs season but LOVE her now IRL on her videos/interviews).

Ugh. 'Why do I have to compete for time?' 'I've been so patient why isn't he paying ALL of his attention to ME?' Girl what? You know the show you signed up for, right? The show where you are literally competing with 29 other women for one man, and where other girls will be going on dates and spending time with him. You can't just expect all of his time/attention to be handed to you on a silver platter. Vanessa annoys the crap out of me, TBH.

I don't mean domineering in that self-assured and assertive sense -- I find her to be attention-grabbing and melodramatic to watch. There's something about how she sucks him in that's emotionally intense, whiney, dramatic and entitled that I don't enjoy. I don't mean regarding her dynamic with the other women. MHO

I agree. I have always, from the very first moment really wanted to like Vanessa cos she's of all people Nick's F1 but she's always been the kind to be dominating and to always draw the optimal attention to herself due to her demeanor (not because she is asking for the attention but because she is dominating and she sucks you in).

I haven't seen the clip so I can't comment on that but IMO I have not seen this version of Vanessa in what has aired on the show. Yes, she said she was surprised that she didn't get the FIR and then the next episode she was practically invisible the entire episode even though she was on a group date.

The next episode was her 1 on 1 with Nick, so no competing with anyone there and then later she was upset about some behavior Nick was exhibiting and addressed it to him like an adult. She didn't talk about Corinne's nanny and her not being mature enough for marriage and any of that. Her issue was plainly Nick's behavior.

Yes there was a VO of her talking about the women being frustrated with Corinne and thinking Corinne would be going home but when she didn't, she didn't whine and bitch about it. Last week's episode she was once again invisible, save for bonding time in a haunted house with Danielle M. We didn't even see any interaction with her and Nick. Meanwhile, we saw Raven say flatly that she was upset when Danielle M. got the group date rose and again, Vanessa in three group dates has never received the rose.

Like I said, I haven't seen the clip because it's not loading on my laptop so maybe she is being annoying and whiny in that moment. But I have simply not seen this needy, dramatic and entitled version of Vanessa throughout the season. How could we, when the season's been so dominated by Corinne and her drama?

There's something about how she sucks him in that's emotionally intense and dramatic that I don't enjoy. I don't mean regarding her dynamic with the other women. MHO

How has Vanessa sucked Nick in? Again we've only seen their 1 on 1 and her calling him out on some of his behavior with Corinne. And all I saw on their 1 on 1 was Nick opening up and being emotionally vulnerable to her by choice which I don't think is a bad thing. Maybe I'm misunderstanding but it sounds like you think she's manipulated him or been manipulating him in some way.

@lleyki let's discuss this topic once you get a moment to check out the video here's a youtube version: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tp4MhJ3Ekm4

BachIsMyGuiltyPleasure wrote:^^ I understand what you're saying even though I'm still a fan of V... I personally take her actions as confidence and I love that in a woman...  as for being emotional, it's so hard to tell what is normal in this environment (for example, I loathed watching Sharleen on JPs season but LOVE her now IRL on her videos/interviews).  

I can understand both your points definitely -- I agree this is an unnatural environment and I totally get how people react in strange ways as I noted in my comment as well so we don't get the full version of V and I acknowledge that.

What I find annoying, very very whiney and dramatic is how she speaks when things don't go her way - her tone of voice when she says "I'm shocked" after FIR or "I've been so patient" "how can my relationship get to another level when all nick is experiencing is me being competitive at a volley ball game?"  "I'm just fed up of it....I'm just fed up of having to compete for time, fed up of having to get his attention" "It's so annoying" then crying after the volleyball date per the preview...looks like Nick goes to talk to her/her teammates and spoilers indicate they don't go home but come on the evening portion of the date even after they lose the game or when she says whinely "I honestly don't want to be here" after the Corrine bouncy house scene

In those moments when things don't go her way I don't see an assertive, confident and mature woman expressing her fears, struggles and challenges but a whiney and melodramatic person who is grabbing attention...in a not so mature way IMHO. She comes off as entitled, bratty and unaware of other women in the group who are also in the same predicament. This doesn't endear her one bit to me. mho

@emusha. Yes Vanessa was "salty" during that group date, wasn't she? I liked Nick salty (in his own way), Vanessa too. So to me, I'm giving them equal opportunity.

So at this point Vanessa is out of the running for Bette, because she is no longer perfect and she will start getting some SM hate IMO.