Ben and Lauren Happily Ever After - Discussion - *Sleuthing - Spoilers*

I've given a lot of crap for Ben, but I actually appreciate how he felt sort of scared to call off the wedding. It was a huge blow to Lauren, and he thought he maybe risked losing her. He should've been scared.

And I'm sure, IMO, that Ben has meltdowns to various extent about everything. He did at AFTR, when Lauren didn't fawn over him. He's never going to find a woman who won't roll her eyes at his meltdowns, and most would tell him to take a hike.

If he was about pandering the fans, he would've got married and kept his fears and insecurities hidden.

IMO their sm actions followed a pattern, they've never written long Ott paragraphs about each other. Lauren called him the love of her life, didn't she?

Imo Ben is scared of getting married for whatever reason moreso than he wants the cash, but he clearly really wants the dough too if he willingly put this relationship on the line to film the show in the first place.

I'm of the opinion that Ben and Lauren both have some faults that they need to work on. Yes, Ben dotes on Lauren and yes, Lauren has changed her whole life around for him. BUT, that's not necessarily enough.. Well, it's just not enough, plain and simple, no need to beat around the bush IMO. Ben needs to not just hear Lauren, but he actually needs to LISTEN to the words coming out of her mouth. He is very much in his head, and is only concerned about his feelings in the short and long term. He's obviously not entirely comfortable expressing his feelings or being, and that's something he seriously needs to communicate and work on. Lauren doesn't appear to be the best listener either. She comes off a little judgemental of/towards him and like others have said, doesn't appear like she's the easiest person to talk to, because of that. This is all just my observations, based on what I've seen/heard on the show and in their recent interviews. For all I know, they might not even have these problems to the extent that they appear to, so it could all possibly be moot to express these concerns. But since they have a show on their relationship, my analyzing is here to stay IMO.

Alanna wrote:Imo Ben is scared of getting married for whatever reason moreso than he wants the cash, but he clearly really wants the dough too if he willingly put this relationship on the line to film the show in the first place.

Touché. Truth. Alanna, with the touché and truth. Smartie pants, you!

IMO.

Lennoxcolinrolland wrote:

Alanna wrote:Imo Ben is scared of getting married for whatever reason moreso than he wants the cash, but he clearly really wants the dough too if he willingly put this relationship on the line to film the show in the first place.

Touché. Truth. Alanna, with the touché and truth. Smartie pants, you!

IMO.

I'll take it as a compliment  

I'm looking forward to how they wrap this all up. A de-engagement and partying with Duh and Twins in Vegas. Swoon. What a fairytale these two have.

Alanna wrote:

Lennoxcolinrolland wrote:

Alanna wrote:Imo Ben is scared of getting married for whatever reason moreso than he wants the cash, but he clearly really wants the dough too if he willingly put this relationship on the line to film the show in the first place.

Touché. Truth. Alanna, with the touché and truth. Smartie pants, you!

IMO.

I'll take it as a compliment  

I'm looking forward to how they wrap this all up. A de-engagement and partying with Duh and Twins in Vegas. Swoon. What a fairytale these two have.

Girl, whenever I talk to you, it's always because I'm complimenting you

Who knows how the rest of this will play out. I'm pretty sure I know the end result though: marriage

Lennoxcolinrolland wrote:I'm of the opinion that Ben and Lauren both have some faults that they need to work on. Yes, Ben dotes on Lauren and yes, Lauren has changed her whole life around for him. BUT, that's not necessarily enough.. Well, it's just not enough, plain and simple, no need to beat around the bush IMO. Ben needs to not just hear Lauren, but he actually needs to LISTEN to the words coming out of her mouth. He is very much in his head, and is only concerned about his feelings in the short and long term. He's obviously not entirely comfortable expressing his feelings or being, and that's something he seriously needs to communicate and work on. Lauren doesn't appear to be the best listener either. She comes off a little judgemental of/towards him and like others have said, doesn't appear like she's the easiest person to talk to, because of that. This is all just my observations, based on what I've seen/heard on the show and in their recent interviews. For all I know, they might not even have these problems to the extent that they appear to, so it could all possibly be moot to express these concerns. But since they have a show on their relationship, my analyzing is here to stay IMO.

Great post - this is exactly how I see it too. I really think these two are in the early stages of their relationship with regards to communicating and that this show was good for them cos it forced some issues to be addressed. I agree that both have flaws and haven't worked out the kinks to figure out how to work as a team.... yet. whether or not that warrants them getting married or not that's entirely up to them.

emusha wrote:

Lennoxcolinrolland wrote:I'm of the opinion that Ben and Lauren both have some faults that they need to work on. Yes, Ben dotes on Lauren and yes, Lauren has changed her whole life around for him. BUT, that's not necessarily enough.. Well, it's just not enough, plain and simple, no need to beat around the bush IMO. Ben needs to not just hear Lauren, but he actually needs to LISTEN to the words coming out of her mouth. He is very much in his head, and is only concerned about his feelings in the short and long term. He's obviously not entirely comfortable expressing his feelings or being, and that's something he seriously needs to communicate and work on. Lauren doesn't appear to be the best listener either. She comes off a little judgemental of/towards him and like others have said, doesn't appear like she's the easiest person to talk to, because of that. This is all just my observations, based on what I've seen/heard on the show and in their recent interviews. For all I know, they might not even have these problems to the extent that they appear to, so it could all possibly be moot to express these concerns. But since they have a show on their relationship, my analyzing is here to stay IMO.

Great post - this is exactly how I see it too. I really think these two are in the early stages of their relationship with regards to communicating and that this show was good for them cos it forced some issues to be addressed. I agree that both have flaws and haven't worked out the kinks to figure out how to work as a team.... yet. whether or not that warrants them getting married or not that's entirely up to them.

Exactly. Completely agree.

I don't think there will be or ever was a de-engagement, but I've been wrong before.  As far as the fairy tale, I think that was one point Ben/the show wanted to make ... real life isn't a fairy tale, every relationship has ups and downs, but you get thru it together.  IMO this is a "reality" show "obstacle" that will be resolved when the Freeform show wraps up in 2 episodes - we'll see how "believable" the "resolution" is. I still think there will be a winter/early 2017 wedding with the planning and wedding shown in 2 episodes - probably on ABC - and hopefully not including any reference to grown sexy.

^ 2 epsiodes? Haven't the wedding specials been only 2 hours?

I still am reminded of the difference between what is said on the show and what Is said in interviews. There's very little reality in reality tv. The only real part of this episode I feel is the emotions during that session. I call BS on the scene where he actually called it off in a tux and wedding dress. Manufactured drama with the road trip, & visit to Chris. Unless they went back to the mansion twice, Ben took over Lauren's snapchat that day and they were being playful and affectionate in the mansion. Lauren pretended to steal a clock. In the fan thread we all just assumed they were there for Ben to give nick advice before moving in. They are shown to go to this random couple counseling yet they actually enrolled in couple counseling at their church so they can work on communicating better. On the show Ben acted as if he had never thought about who he would want as groomsmen but then in an interview with the knot he said he's had the list of names in his phone for a long time so he doesn't forget who's always been there for him.
IMO, there seems to be a disconnect and I think the producers are behind this... Steering and manipulating the 'storyline' the way the want. BenLo are their puppets. Of course they have to obey what they say. They realize they need to play nice to get their paycheck. I do think because of this Lauren and Ben have had to work through issues they didn't realize would occur because of the tv life/real life differences. I do believe it has been a learning experience for them as a couple and they seem dedicated to make it work. I see the love they have for each other in the way they look at each other.

As the old couple said, there's no such thing as a couple that don't have disagreements. That's what's fake and unreal.

That said, the Ben I saw in the last two episodes, is the Ben who said two ILYs. So indecisive.  If he was this un-ready or un-prepared to get married, why agree to become the Bachelor.

I still think this show is contrived and he will have a dramatic turn around and propose again and they get married in January.

If they're not getting married, why is he practicing how to dance?