Becca Tilly - Bachelor 20 - #3 - *Sleuthing - Spoilers*

Hunni, after a few years of marriage, we all end up with the things we don't expect--it's called life!   Hopefully, it's a fun ride, smooth, bumpy, wild and sweet. You need great gas mileage, a good set of shocks and an excellent warranty protection plan. That way when you discover the spare tire and realize you need the extra lube you can say eeees okay.

mindless wrote:

nothatgirl wrote:

bluwavz wrote:

I don't think she has contempt for sexuality (she is friends with Kaitlyn after all) but I do get the sense that she fears it especially when it comes to herself. Surely she's come across some sexual content in her life even if she's a virgin? How sheltered can she be? Sex is pretty much everywhere these days.

I get the sense she's afraid of it too. Just the fact that she "dated" dez on and off for 5 years supports that for me; it seems to me that she chose to be with a guy who only saw her as a friend, so she could avoid really putting herself out there emotionally and physically with someone who really loved her and craved that intimacy with her. And, as much as her family protested about their edit, they did say things like "we've never seen Becca hold hands with a guy!l". Even this bachelor obsession seems like a way of avoiding her issues. I don't think that either Chris or Ben would have ever dated a virgin and I think she probably knew that too. JMO.

Eh, I'm not a virgin, but I don't think my parents have seen me holding hands with anyone either. Not everyone is into PDA. I also barely dated until I was 26 and now I've been with the same person for almost 4 years. It only takes one after all, if it's the right one. I don't get the thinking that you have to have a bunch of "practice relationships" before you can succeed in one. People are different. Some get it right on the first try, some never will. Becca just hasn't found the right person and doesn't seem to be prioritizing finding one at the moment. She's clearly a late bloomer, but there's nothing wrong with that IMO.

Beautiful post @mindless and so well-said!

Bottom line is, Becca is her own person and the right one for her will come, no matter whether she has many or no "practice" relationships.

I can understand saving yourself for marriage, however the argument that they only want to be engaged and married once, IMO is not a guarantee. The security of your marriage, has nothing to do with saving yourself.

Trust me.

Plus, some end up wondering what they missed. Again, trust me.

nothatgirl wrote:I don't get a gay vibe from her at all. I have friends who are 26 and have never been in relationships and are virgins. I don't think it's that uncommon or even something to be ashamed of. I just think Becca comes off as too immature and judgmental because she's stuck with a 13-y/o's fantasy of what love and relationships look like.

Virginity aside, her lack of dating and real adult relationships make me totally agree with the bolded. I respect her choice. But no real relationships, never falling in love, and being perpetually single seem like defence mechanisms for something and I think the older she gets without letting herself experience love and emotional intimacy the more trapped in a school girls idea of relationships she'll get. I think she's gorgeous and kind and I hope she dates a bit to maybe learn to open up more. She is so ill suited for this franchise IMO, it's not even funny.

As odd as it may sound, maybe this franchise is a way for Becca to explore dating in a manner that makes her comfortable. I understand the reasons that her presence on the show irritates viewers. At the same time, though, the franchise sees value in having Becca there. Yes, maybe they poke fun at her virginity and unwillingness to get engaged, yet they still welcome her back; plus, she's well liked by other cast mates and viewers. It's a symbiotic relationship.

I'm very interested in seeing her date tonight with Ben. It'll tell me if she really has a vested interest in him or if she accepted the chance to return to the show for the limelight. Maybe it's a little of both. Either way, I like Becca, and I'm rooting for her to find her happily ever after by whatever path she's comfortable.

I actually think that Becca is using the show as a way to look like you want to be in a relationship when you really don't. She knew that Ben was highly unlikely to pick her especially if he really did suggest she not come on which I'm still thinking he did. I've seen nothing that suggests she's really in a hurry to find love which is fine but just wish it wasn't on my tv. She may have been somewhat popular on CS' season but think there's going to be Becca fatigue by the time she leaves this one. JMO

albean99 wrote:I actually think that Becca is using the show as a way to look like you want to be in a relationship when you really don't. She knew that Ben was highly unlikely to pick her especially if he really did suggest she not come on which I'm still thinking he did. I've seen nothing that suggests she's really in a hurry to find love which is fine but just wish it wasn't on my tv. She may have been somewhat popular on CS' season but think there's going to be Becca fatigue by the time she leaves this one. JMO

Totally agree with the bolded.  I think Becca intrigues a lot of viewers and makes interesting conversation but for me it is the same ole Becca from last season.  Does she have any career goals, life goals that guide her in making decisions about what she does to keep active besides waiting for "Mr. Right"?

Updated the main SM page with Becca's Snapchat: beccatilley and corrected her IG

Becca responding to someone who claimed Ben didn't want her on the show on her IG:

neeneelinda
Becca is our favorite but Ben did not want her on his show. The producers want her on for next bachlorette. It's all a big sham for poor Ben

beccatilley
@neeneelinda @abby.gal please be smarter than to believe everything you hear or read about. Use that beautiful brain the good Lord gave you.

She is so annoying. IMO.

Again, the lady doth protests too much.

If she is eliminated on the show by Feb 14th, I be she shows up at the Bach alum party on Valentine's day, the 20th Season Celebration viewing.  Amber will be with her.