Becca Tilly - Bachelor 20 - #3 - *Sleuthing - Spoilers*

I'm not sure I get the vibe that she's in the closet but she does come off sexuality repressed to me and I do think she has intimacy issues. Her reaction to a clothed massage was prudish.

I don't think there's anything wrong with Becca, nor is she in the closet. She just hasn't met the right person yet and mingling with the Bachelor crowd doesn't help with that. Maybe she knows, consciously or subconsiously, that she's not ready to settle down and that's why she's wasting her time on this show.

For a virgin at 27 years of age who has had limited experience, I think her reaction is probably normal in that context.

I don't particularly like Becca, but don't like speculating on anyone's sexuality when there's really no reason for it.

bluwavz wrote:I'm not sure I get the vibe that she's in the closet but she does come off sexuality repressed to me and I do think she has intimacy issues. Her reaction to a clothed massage was prudish.

Some of the most promiscuous people have intimacy issues too.
I'd rather her be prudish than overtly sexual - especially on camera.
I guess I just feel weird talking about someone's sexual status/orientation/experience, etc.
This is an odd show

I'm not sure how one can say she has intimacy issues, when she's chosen to not be intimate until her wedding night. It would be more weird if she was all over every man. People would be doubting her virginity like they have Ashley I's or saying she's a technical virgin or whatever. To me she's just acting like someone who's serious about waiting. It's not like she's avoiding physical contact, she was always playing with Chris's hands and Ben's too from the little I've seen so far. She doesn't mind their hands on her leg either.

AllAboutLove wrote:

bluwavz wrote:I'm not sure I get the vibe that she's in the closet but she does come off sexuality repressed to me and I do think she has intimacy issues. Her reaction to a clothed massage was prudish.

Some of the most promiscuous people have intimacy issues too.
I'd rather her be prudish than overtly sexual - especially on camera.
I guess I just feel weird talking about someone's sexual status/orientation/experience, etc.
This is an odd show

Of course and there's virgins who don't have intimacy issues. I'm not saying she's a prude because she's a virgin. Not at all. I'm saying her reaction to a clothed massage was prudish. Perhaps I'm wrong. That's just my impression of her.

Becca has made her sexual status and lack of experience public so it's fair game. If anyone is uncomfortable talking about it they don't have to.

Given Wikipedia's definition of prude I don't see Becca as a prude.

[A prude] is generally considered a pejorative term to suggest fear and contempt of human sexuality and excessive, unusual modesty stemming from such a negative view of sexuality. It is hence unflattering, often used as an insult.

I don't think Becca has fear or contempt for sexuality or a negative view of it, rather she is just waiting for marriage and is 27 yo so her experience is limited.

I found her reaction to the massage came across more as inexperienced/sheltered than prudish.

mindless wrote:I'm not sure how one can say she has intimacy issues, when she's chosen to not be intimate until her wedding night. It would be more weird if she was all over every man. People would be doubting her virginity like they have Ashley I's or saying she's a technical virgin or whatever. To me she's just acting like someone who's serious about waiting. It's not like she's avoiding physical contact, she was always playing with Chris's hands and Ben's too from the little I've seen so far. She doesn't mind their hands on her leg either.  

I cannot see how she will ever get to a wedding night if she doesn't date anyone period! That is my point. This girl goes out and everywhere most days of the week. She's definitely met people, why isn't there ever anyone good enough to date?? 

rhondam wrote:

mindless wrote:I'm not sure how one can say she has intimacy issues, when she's chosen to not be intimate until her wedding night. It would be more weird if she was all over every man. People would be doubting her virginity like they have Ashley I's or saying she's a technical virgin or whatever. To me she's just acting like someone who's serious about waiting. It's not like she's avoiding physical contact, she was always playing with Chris's hands and Ben's too from the little I've seen so far. She doesn't mind their hands on her leg either.  

I cannot see how she will ever get to a wedding night if she doesn't date anyone period! That is my point. This girl goes out and everywhere most days of the week. She's definitely met people, why isn't there ever anyone good enough to date?? 

The same can be said about a lot of these contestants, some of whom are much older than Becca. She only turned 27 last year so she is still young yet. Many others are nearing 40 rather than 30 and still haven't found anyone to date.

AllAboutLove wrote:Given Wikipedia's definition of prude I don't see Becca as a prude.

[A prude] is generally considered a pejorative term to suggest fear and contempt of human sexuality and excessive, unusual modesty stemming from such a negative view of sexuality. It is hence unflattering, often used as an insult.

I don't think Becca has fear or contempt for sexuality or a negative view of it, rather she is just waiting for marriage and is 27 yo so her experience is limited.

I found her reaction to the massage came across more as inexperienced/sheltered than prudish.

I don't think she has contempt for sexuality (she is friends with Kaitlyn after all) but I do get the sense that she fears it especially when it comes to herself. Surely she's come across some sexual content in her life even if she's a virgin? How sheltered can she be? Sex is pretty much everywhere these days.

rhondam wrote:

mindless wrote:I'm not sure how one can say she has intimacy issues, when she's chosen to not be intimate until her wedding night. It would be more weird if she was all over every man. People would be doubting her virginity like they have Ashley I's or saying she's a technical virgin or whatever. To me she's just acting like someone who's serious about waiting. It's not like she's avoiding physical contact, she was always playing with Chris's hands and Ben's too from the little I've seen so far. She doesn't mind their hands on her leg either.  

I cannot see how she will ever get to a wedding night if she doesn't date anyone period! That is my point. This girl goes out and everywhere most days of the week. She's definitely met people, why isn't there ever anyone good enough to date?? 

IMO she hasn't met the right guy yet and she doesn't want to settle. I'm sure there are people on this board that can relate. I know I certainly can.