Re: Nick Viall Bachelorette 11 - Fan Forum - *SLEUTHING - SPOILERS* - Thread #15

[Cecilia]

It seems from tonight's episode that she was very conflicted. Editing? I'm not sure but think not. His mom and belle's tears killed me

[AllAboutLove]

It seems from tonight's episode that she was very conflicted. Editing? I'm not sure but think not. His mom and belle's tears killed me

Just horrible to watch. The FRC is going to be worse. Not looking forward to that at all.

[happygolucky]

During RFL show I started to follow Tracy Mcmillan, who was Jenna's matchmaker ... although, in all honesty, Tim and Jenna didn't need any matchmaking, because they did it on their own, but still I "give" Tracy a credit for choosing Jenna among all the girls to be in her group, so that she was there ... at the right place and right time. I stopped following her after reading her very negative tweets about Nick ... yes, that's right, I don't appreciate her "logic" enough to want to applaud her "expertise" as a "relationship-know-it-all". So this morning I've decided to check her "side" and see what a clever remark she's offered ...
@TracyMcMillan 3 hours ago
I just figured it out: Kaitlyn loves Shawn, but she's IN LOVE with Nick.
Now, excuse me for breaking this down - IMHO:
I disagree. I believe Kaitlyn "loves" Nick ... but is in-love with Shawn. (although I could dispute that too, ...)

My reasoning is, that when a woman loves a man, she knows why ... she knows what she loves about him ... she knows why he is this great guy worth of her affection ... and Kaitlyn knows that about Nick.
When a woman is in-love with a man, she doesn't know how to "spell it out", she doesn't find the right logic ... it is just there ... this Love ... "at the first sight" ... unexplainable ... and Kaitlyn has found that with Shawn.

I'm not here to decide what is right or wrong or better and worse ... I do hope though that despite all the love Nick felt and I presume still feels for Kaitlyn ... it is all there is ... love for a person who has shaken his world, left it vulnerable and stripped of defenses, broken maybe, shaken enough and open to doubt, changed him visibly ... love that can transform Nick's life positively ... for the wonderful love that is yet to come.

“..And now you've lost the only thing that ever made you feel alive” ― Keith Urban
I hope Nick can learn something from this experience ... maybe it was crucial enough to have it for the second time ... and feel it ... hear it ... see it with the eyes wide open ...
that he is a wonderful guy, who can make any day a bright one, fulfilling and rewarding, for himself, by himself, with people around, friends, colleagues, family, because it is his essence that makes him FEEL ALIVE. And only the person who will get that, sense that in his presence will be the person worth to live "with" (not for).

[AllAboutLove]

I would take Tracy's comments with a grain of salt since she knew her contestants personally and is just tweeting about this show. I actually disagree with most of her comments.

I think Kaitlyn let it go too far with Nick as she says in VO in the preview for FRC when you see Nick holding a ring. She said she didn't mean it to go that far before figuring it out.

I am hopeful that she stops him before he proposes or at least feels bad for him and is kind. Nothing but hope left at this point because it is going to be painful considering Nick's mom said to Kaitlyn she didn't think she would take him to F2 only to have the same thing happen and Kaitlyn reassured Nick's mom.

I think Nick is/was devastated... his tweets around that time confirm it and I think he has enough heartbreak to last most people a lifetime. I get he went on this show... again... but if only he had been F6 or something. I honestly feel like Nick being in the F2 spot is what gave him confidence... because who could imagine he would be F2 a year later... again?? I certainly wouldn't.

[stuckinsc]

I don't feel to bad for Nick. I do for his family. Because while it is hard to believe she would bring him to F2 to dump him, she also kept the guy who basically has called him all sorts of terrible and she even tattled on him to said guy. He saw that Shawn didn't answer him and got defensive, why would he have been any better to Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn keeping Shawn after FDs should have been a huge clue to Nick. He just chose to ignore it and focus on what he wanted.

I do think that Nick thought he and Kaitlyn had a real love that Shawn was a lust/obsession. I still think that to, but if someone picks lust and obsession over you, then they were never going to be good for you.

I want to smack Nick for putting his mom through that again. She was so hurt last time.

[AllAboutLove]

I think it was more shocking to his family because they got to see him in the F2 spot. That hadn't happened last time as HTDs there were more guys... so it probably brought back a ton of memories and made them realize, oh wow, this is the same place Nick was in last year and we are seeing him in person at this point of time.

I also think that change is what made Nick not read the signs in addition to him not starting the season with Shawn -- he never got to see how she was with someone other than himself.

I also think that his family would feel this pain for Nick even if he didn't go on TV for a girl. I think Nick is one of those guys who gives his all and it is hard to watch someone's heart get broken time after time... whether on tv or not.

That being said, Nick is doing much better this time around and I believed him when he told his mom he would have no regrets if it didn't work out. It just means that it wouldn't have worked in real life either in Nick's opinion. He is better off because of this, imo. And like his mom said, he deserves happiness/love.

[happygolucky]

Nick went on the show for himself ... without considering the feelings of his family. It was to "catch" that dream (girl). He didn't catch it. In a way he lost, or should say, hopefully he realized the dream was just a dream and not the reality.

He has to pay his dues, but unfortunately when a family cares so much for you, as Nick's cares for him, they suffer with you, they feel for him and for his hurt ... so

the best thing for Nick to do after the break-up is/was to get on his feet fast again ... find his "cloud" (since airy people will never lose it) and smile again (which we've seen him do) ... so that his family doesn't have to carry the burden of his actions.

So I hope this fan-site can help just that, since last year I feel a bit guilty to have contributed to the continuous feeling that there was something tangible in the shown relationship. This time ... I say, cut the cord.

[AllAboutLove]

There's no way anyone would have predicted he would be F2 again, imo. So yes he went on the show for himself but that it is his life after all, and I am not sure what burden his family carries? They would carry it either way and that is their choice too. People take risks for love and sometimes it works out sometimes it doesn't.

If Nick was F1 everyone would be saying this was the best risk ever.

It just is what it is and I don't personally feel bad for Nick or his family... not in the long run... because what did Nick do wrong? Heartbreak would have come whether he was on this show or not... what is meant to be was meant to be... hindsight is always 20/20 but I don't feel sorry for Nick or his family when it comes to him and his own love life. He gave it his all and what more can one ask? I would be proud of him, imo.

Yeah it hurts, but that is part of life, imo. He went after a girl and she didn't choose him in the end. Not so bad really. This stuff happens every day...

[happygolucky]

By the burden I meant his "heartbreak", hurt (his). - Overall, I agree with you AAL.

[AllAboutLove]

Yeah... that burden of heartbreak does hurt... but I think it is just part of life. Life is one big risk after all.

In the bubble (watching the show) I feel bad for all involved but longterm I think it was a brave thing to do and he took a risk, it didn't pay off, but one day that ability he has to risk it all will pay off big time.

Said it before, but that is what I love about risk takers like Nick, they are true optimists and it is because of this they never lose hope.

Ultimately, I think Nick would have regretted not taking the risk at all more than having his heart broken.

Rather to know than wonder "what if"... And I am glad he did it on this show because it forced K to make a choice and thus Nick knew he wasn't the one like he said before... no matter how magical a connection he felt, if K felt like there was a better fit rather to know that.

Nick still deserves to be F1 to someone who wants him and has no doubts. I am sure he will find that person, or rather, that person will find him. jmo

[stuckinsc]

Nick's mom was very hurt last year with all the hate spewed at her son. She made a post of FB about it. It hurt her a lot. So yes, I would expect her son to think, is this going to be really hard on my mom again. Is she worth it? I would hope before he made the choice that he at least let them know he was going to try and gave them time to expect it.

Nick is not the only one dealing with the hate towards him, his parents and siblings who love him felt the hate too. So yes, I do feel bad for them that Nick made this choice and I do hope he apologized to his mom for putting her through this again. He is truly blessed to have a large, loving family who supports him, even if it is hard. It was very hard for them last time, so they easily could have said, no thanks we will skip HTD. But they love him, so they were there for him. It would be nice for him to thank them for that. Not every family has been. Emily's parents didn't show up on Bachelor, neither did Melissa's. To have your family show up twice when you could get crushed and damaged twice is hard. And I do think Nick's mom felt he was damaged by the process last year.

JMO.

[happygolucky]

- deleted the original post - ETA:

Brian Osborne ‏@Coach_Osborne 13 hours ago
@viallnicholas28's family is cool as poop. FYI. #TheBachelorette

Nick Viall ‏@viallnicholas28 13 hours ago Chicago, IL
@Coach_Osborne I like them too

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