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Post by Lucas15 Wed Jul 08, 2015 11:17 pm

Ariela wrote:IMO, Shawn's hissy fit when Jared got the rose was not about jealousy per se. S was confused, and upset. He wanted TO CRY, not beat anybody up.

After K slept with Nick she started ignoring S. She was going hot and cold because she didn't know how to act. SHAWN COULD FEEL THAT.....Anyone who has been cheated on knows when something is wrong. It's a GUT feeling, no matter how hard the cheater tries to hide it. Cheaters do one of two things, they start giving excuses why they aren't around, or some are overly nice so you do not pick up on their infidelity.

Shawn needed super validation, not a cold shoulder. Because he felt that he was losing her since Nick came onto the horizon, he was watching every move  she made. Don't forget, her actions did not match her words.

I bolded the two most significant parts of your post which I agree with totally.

Shawn was not jealous of Jared and the fact that Jared got the group date rose; he was confused by what Kaitlyn had said to him in private and her actions which didn't make any sense to him. IMO Shawn - as a show rookie - would not be aware how the producers can and do manipulate so from his perspective, Kaitlyn told him "you're the one" and then went on a group date where she could have given him the rose and instead - she gave it to Jared. And IMO if any of us were in that same situation we would feel just as confused as Shawn did because it wouldn't make sense to us and it didn't make sense to Shawn.

IMO the producers knew exactly what they were doing and they had Kaitlyn give the rose to Jared just to mess with Shawn.

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Post by stuckinsc Wed Jul 08, 2015 11:30 pm

Lucas15 wrote:
Ariela wrote:IMO, Shawn's hissy fit when Jared got the rose was not about jealousy per se. S was confused, and upset. He wanted TO CRY, not beat anybody up.

After K slept with Nick she started ignoring S. She was going hot and cold because she didn't know how to act. SHAWN COULD FEEL THAT.....Anyone who has been cheated on knows when something is wrong. It's a GUT feeling, no matter how hard the cheater tries to hide it. Cheaters do one of two things, they start giving excuses why they aren't around, or some are overly nice so you do not pick up on their infidelity.

Shawn needed super validation, not a cold shoulder. Because he felt that he was losing her since Nick came onto the horizon, he was watching every move  she made. Don't forget, her actions did not match her words.

I bolded the two most significant parts of your post which I agree with totally.

Shawn was not jealous of Jared and the fact that Jared got the group date rose; he was confused by what Kaitlyn had said to him in private and her actions which didn't make any sense to him. IMO Shawn - as a show rookie - would not be aware how the producers can and do manipulate so from his perspective, Kaitlyn told him "you're the one" and then went on a group date where she could have given him the rose and instead - she gave it to Jared. And IMO if any of us were in that same situation we would feel just as confused as Shawn did because it wouldn't make sense to us and it didn't make sense to Shawn.

IMO the producers knew exactly what they were doing and they had Kaitlyn give the rose to Jared just to mess with Shawn.

How much of a show rookie is Shawn if he knew enough showing up on night one that he wanted Kaitlyn, to the point he did not bother to talk to Britt? He obviously saw some of the show.

I try to be fair, when Nick tattles I call him out on it. So can we stop making so many excuses for when Shawn behaves like a meathead?

He went on this show, if he didn't find out what that means, then he is an idiot. We have his own words that say that he and ABC discussed it enough for him to have time to at least understand how the show works and that Kaitlyn was supposed to get to know all the men and that she wasn't allowed to only spend time with one man until the end of the show.

And sorry, Ali told Roberto on their first 1:1 date that he was the one, he managed to go through that whole season without acting like a jerk or getting mad that Ali had to do her job.

Shawn is misbehaving, pure and simple. Yes, Kaitlyn is also misbehaving. Makes them perfect. But her actions don't excuse him acting the way he does. Just like Shawn being enough of a douchebag to tell the other guys how he has sex with the same girl on the night she had sex with a country music start doesn't excuse Nick from being a tattle tale.
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Post by citygirl1962 Wed Jul 08, 2015 11:38 pm

Lucas15 wrote:
Ariela wrote:IMO, Shawn's hissy fit when Jared got the rose was not about jealousy per se. S was confused, and upset. He wanted TO CRY, not beat anybody up.

After K slept with Nick she started ignoring S. She was going hot and cold because she didn't know how to act. SHAWN COULD FEEL THAT.....Anyone who has been cheated on knows when something is wrong. It's a GUT feeling, no matter how hard the cheater tries to hide it. Cheaters do one of two things, they start giving excuses why they aren't around, or some are overly nice so you do not pick up on their infidelity.

Shawn needed super validation, not a cold shoulder. Because he felt that he was losing her since Nick came onto the horizon, he was watching every move  she made. Don't forget, her actions did not match her words.

I bolded the two most significant parts of your post which I agree with totally.

Shawn was not jealous of Jared and the fact that Jared got the group date rose; he was confused by what Kaitlyn had said to him in private and her actions which didn't make any sense to him. IMO Shawn - as a show rookie - would not be aware how the producers can and do manipulate so from his perspective, Kaitlyn told him "you're the one" and then went on a group date where she could have given him the rose and instead - she gave it to Jared. And IMO if any of us were in that same situation we would feel just as confused as Shawn did because it wouldn't make sense to us and it didn't make sense to Shawn.

IMO the producers knew exactly what they were doing and they had Kaitlyn give the rose to Jared just to mess with Shawn.

I think Ali Fedotowsky explained this on her blog that Kaitlyn has a show to finish and she could not make it more obvious by giving Shawn the GDR. Remember Shawn got the GDR on episode 4 in NYC then he had a 1 on 1 date on episode 5 in San Antonio. So i think even if she wants to give it Shawn on episode 6, they would not allow her otherwise they could just wrap it up and prepare for the FRC. JMHO.

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Post by Lucas15 Wed Jul 08, 2015 11:45 pm

stuckinsc wrote:How much of a show rookie is Shawn if he knew enough showing up on night one that he wanted Kaitlyn, to the point he did not bother to talk to Britt?  He obviously saw some of the show.

Seeing the show on TV and appearing on it and being in the middle of producer manipulation are two entirely different things. Most viewers have no idea what goes on behind the curtain and that's one of the show's deepest secrets. IMO it should be required reading for every show contestant to read what an ex-insider has to say - some excerpts from an interview with Sarah Gertrude Shapiro - Co Executive Producer of UnREAL and past producer on 9 seasons of The Bachelor:

Do you think viewers realize how fake reality TV can be?
Reality TV is so close to scripted TV at this point. It takes a really sophisticated set of skills to be able to manipulate those emotions out of people -- and viewers are so keen to phoniness. A lot of the producers who make reality TV are really, really smart. They’re performing like CIA-level interrogations.

What would you say to someone who is considering going on a reality show?
That you truly cannot know what you’re signing up for. You can’t understand the power of editing. There are a lot of really smart people making these shows. It’s a chess game you can’t win. There have been some people on reality TV who have totally worked the system, like the Kardashians, who have final cut on their show because they’re producers. But on “The Bachelor,” you can’t anticipate what you’re going to feel like when you have no phone, no Internet, no computer, no books, no radio, can’t control over your food and there’s a ton of alcohol. It’s pretty hard to keep control.

If you don't really understand this - probably from actually experiencing this - you're a show rookie.

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Post by Lucas15 Wed Jul 08, 2015 11:54 pm

citygirl1962 wrote:I think Ali Fedotowsky explained this on her blog that Kaitlyn has a show to finish and she could not make it more obvious by giving Shawn the GDR. Remember Shawn got the GDR on episode 4 in NYC then he had a 1 on 1 date on episode 5 in San Antonio. So i think even if she wants to give it Shawn on episode 6, they would not allow her otherwise they could just wrap it up and prepare for the FRC. JMHO.

IMO Ali is right - she's been there and done that and she knows how the game is played. Shawn didn't when he was in the game - but I bet he does now. I believe that Shawn might be one of the most manipulated cast ever though Kaitlyn is IMO really up there too.

I understand what Kaitlyn was trying to do when she told Shawn he was the one - she wanted to save him some anxiety AND she wanted to make sure he hung around to the end. What she failed to do was tell him exactly what that was going to entail and what she was going to have to do to get to the end and that left him confused and not believing her words when he saw her do it. Ashley had a little bit better a handle on this with JP and it still didn't keep JP from freaking out in Hong Kong but they let Ashley give JP the GDR - Kaitlyn they did let do that.
JMO

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Post by albean99 Wed Jul 08, 2015 11:59 pm

Lucas15 wrote:
stuckinsc wrote:How much of a show rookie is Shawn if he knew enough showing up on night one that he wanted Kaitlyn, to the point he did not bother to talk to Britt?  He obviously saw some of the show.

Seeing the show on TV and appearing on it and being in the middle of producer manipulation are two entirely different things. Most viewers have no idea what goes on behind the curtain and that's one of the show's deepest secrets. IMO it should be required reading for every show contestant to read what an ex-insider has to say - some excerpts from an interview with Sarah Gertrude Shapiro - Co Executive Producer of UnREAL and past producer on 9 seasons of The Bachelor:

Do you think viewers realize how fake reality TV can be?
Reality TV is so close to scripted TV at this point. It takes a really sophisticated set of skills to be able to manipulate those emotions out of people -- and viewers are so keen to phoniness. A lot of the producers who make reality TV are really, really smart. They’re performing like CIA-level interrogations.

What would you say to someone who is considering going on a reality show?
That you truly cannot know what you’re signing up for. You can’t understand the power of editing. There are a lot of really smart people making these shows. It’s a chess game you can’t win. There have been some people on reality TV who have totally worked the system, like the Kardashians, who have final cut on their show because they’re producers. But on “The Bachelor,” you can’t anticipate what you’re going to feel like when you have no phone, no Internet, no computer, no books, no radio, can’t control over your food and there’s a ton of alcohol. It’s pretty hard to keep control.

If you don't really understand this - probably from actually experiencing this - you're a show rookie.

ITA, in fact I don't think any of us have a clue what it's really like. We can watch UnReal or read all about it but that doesn't mean we're immune to the Bachelor Bubble. I also think most people go on the show thinking it's a lark and they're not going to fall for the lead so I think they're taken by surprise when it happens. That's what I see with Shawn.


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Post by stuckinsc Thu Jul 09, 2015 12:14 am

I am so sorry, but Shawn went on the same show as everyone else.  *edit*  He is where many others have been.  He is reacting poorly, that is all on him, no one else.  I am willing to admit that he is not just what I am seeing on my screen, but I always fall back to what Tiffany from the first Real World said, they can only use what you give them. Shawn acted this way on multiple occasions.  He acted this way because of Jared, but mostly Nick. He told Kaitlyn she wasn't being smart.  Those are all his actions and his words.  

Sorry, but I have lost patience for the excuses made for Shawn that have not been made for others in the past.  If I saw the same patience and excuses for all it would not bug me, but that is not what happens.

In the end what I think doesn't matter.  Kaitlyn and Shawn will either make it or not. I find them both very immature, especially given their age.  So if they survived, great, but much like the past two couples from this show, I won't be shocked if they fail.

ETA, Bean, he went on the same show that others have gone on for eleven seasons now.  So nope, sorry, it is on Shawn to own up to his own behavior.  I don't think he is going to beat Kaitlyn.  I do think he has control issues, and a large jealous streak.  He is possessive.  Kaitlyn likes it so good for them, but it doesn't change that it is what his actions are.  Now if you want to tell me he has TBI from the car accident, okay, that is an excuse to me.  Not he didn't know how hard this show would be.  We have never let that excuse work for a woman who acts like Shawn does, so nope it doesn't work for him either.  JMO.
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Post by AllAboutLove Thu Jul 09, 2015 12:19 am

bilolo wrote:I say we see what we want to see.
I get what you mean but I wish I saw what I wanted to see.  giggling
This whole thing would not be the crazy mess it seems to be if I saw what I wanted to see... which is the end of all this drama for the sake of drama.
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Post by Guest Thu Jul 09, 2015 12:26 am

stuckinsc wrote:I am so sorry, but Shawn went on the same show as everyone else.  You gave Nick no slack last season for being a show rookie, so I find that excuse laughable.  He is where many others have been.  He is reacting poorly, that is all on him, no one else.  I am willing to admit that he is not just what I am seeing on my screen, but I always fall back to what Tiffany from the first Real World said, they can only use what you give them. Shawn acted this way on multiple occasions.  He acted this way because of Jared, but mostly Nick. He told Kaitlyn she wasn't being smart.  Those are all his actions and his words.  

Sorry, but I have lost patience for the excuses made for Shawn that have not been made for others in the past.  If I saw the same patience and excuses for all it would not bug me, but that is not what happens.

In the end what I think doesn't matter.  Kaitlyn and Shawn will either make it or not. I find them both very immature, especially given their age.  So if they survived, great, but much like the past two couples from this show, I won't be shocked if they fail.

ETA, Bean, he went on the same show that others have gone on for eleven seasons now.  So nope, sorry, it is on Shawn to own up to his own behavior.  I don't think he is going to beat Kaitlyn.  I do think he has control issues, and a large jealous streak.  He is possessive.  Kaitlyn likes it so good for them, but it doesn't change that it is what his actions are.  Now if you want to tell me he has TBI from the car accident, okay, that is an excuse to me.  Not he didn't know how hard this show would be.  We have never let that excuse work for a woman who acts like Shawn does, so nope it doesn't work for him either.  JMO.

Yeah, I agree. I just think that if you're going to excuse everyone's actions just because of producer manipulation and editing, there literally can't be anyone on reality TV we hate. That's saying that Bentley, Wes, Tierra, Kalon, Courtney, etc. were all wonderful, delightful people that were simply victims of the evil producers. The truth is that producers know what makes certain contestants tick and they know what personality traits are hidden underneath and how to get the worst ones to come out at the worst time. Shawn IS immature, hot-headed, jealous, possessive, and hypocritical. He probably also has many, many wonderful traits that most people see on a regular basis (and we're not), but that doesn't take away that his words and actions were his own.

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Post by Maggenzm Thu Jul 09, 2015 12:44 am

Ariela wrote:Don't forget the first Shawn drunken freakout. It was not about Nick at all, it was about Jared and a GDR. So nope that pass is not completely accurate. Also it seems that he kind of "peed" on her early so the other guys would back off. When Jared didn't back off enough he did get mad and possessive and so nicely talked about her banging other guys. Really classy of him.
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I don't think that Shawn is dangerous, but I think he is possessive. But I also think that Kaitlyn likes that. As Alanna has pointed out, I think that his possessiveness makes Kaitlyn feel loved. To me it is a huge red flag that these two could be in for a rocky road, as they both seem pretty immature to me. But I do think he is the best match for her, so good luck to them. I am over this season. Watching her cry and Shawn throw hissy fits is exhausting and not fun at all. They deserve each other IMO.
*************************************************************************************************************

IMO, Shawn's hissy fit when Jared got the rose was not about jealousy per se. S was confused, and upset. He wanted TO CRY, not beat anybody up.

After K slept with Nick she started ignoring S. She was going hot and cold because she didn't know how to act. SHAWN COULD FEEL THAT.....Anyone who has been cheated on knows when something is wrong. It's a GUT feeling, no matter how hard the cheater tries to hide it. Cheaters do one of two things, they start giving excuses why they aren't around, or some are overly nice so you do not pick up on their infidelity.

Shawn needed super validation, not a cold shoulder. Because he felt that he was losing her since Nick came onto the horizon, he was watching every move  she made. Don't forget, her actions did not match her words.

Thank you Ariela!! IMHO, being told by Kait that he was "the one" made it more difficult for him. So, I give him a pass. Being told again she slept with Nick also drove him crazy, so I give him another pass. Shawn is very logical, so when things don't add up in his mind, he goes to the person that will give him the answer, I LOVE THAT ABOUT HIM. SO, AS FAR AS I AM CONCERN, HE IS THE "BEST" AND THE BEST MATCH FOR KAITLYN. #KAITBOO
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Post by stuckinsc Thu Jul 09, 2015 1:03 am

Maggenzm wrote:
Ariela wrote:Don't forget the first Shawn drunken freakout. It was not about Nick at all, it was about Jared and a GDR. So nope that pass is not completely accurate. Also it seems that he kind of "peed" on her early so the other guys would back off. When Jared didn't back off enough he did get mad and possessive and so nicely talked about her banging other guys. Really classy of him.
stuckinsc
I don't think that Shawn is dangerous, but I think he is possessive. But I also think that Kaitlyn likes that. As Alanna has pointed out, I think that his possessiveness makes Kaitlyn feel loved. To me it is a huge red flag that these two could be in for a rocky road, as they both seem pretty immature to me. But I do think he is the best match for her, so good luck to them. I am over this season. Watching her cry and Shawn throw hissy fits is exhausting and not fun at all. They deserve each other IMO.
*************************************************************************************************************

IMO, Shawn's hissy fit when Jared got the rose was not about jealousy per se. S was confused, and upset. He wanted TO CRY, not beat anybody up.

After K slept with Nick she started ignoring S. She was going hot and cold because she didn't know how to act. SHAWN COULD FEEL THAT.....Anyone who has been cheated on knows when something is wrong. It's a GUT feeling, no matter how hard the cheater tries to hide it. Cheaters do one of two things, they start giving excuses why they aren't around, or some are overly nice so you do not pick up on their infidelity.

Shawn needed super validation, not a cold shoulder. Because he felt that he was losing her since Nick came onto the horizon, he was watching every move  she made. Don't forget, her actions did not match her words.

Thank you Ariela!! IMHO, being told by Kait that he was "the one" made it more difficult for him. So, I give him a pass. Being told again she slept with Nick also drove him crazy, so I give him another pass. Shawn is very logical, so when things don't add up in his mind, he goes to the person that will give him the answer,  I LOVE THAT ABOUT HIM. SO, AS FAR AS I AM CONCERN, HE IS THE "BEST" AND THE BEST MATCH FOR KAITLYN.  #KAITBOO

Roberto was also told very early he was the one, Ali has admitted to telling him on their first 1:1.  Somehow Roberto got through the season without acting out like Shawn.  So nope again IMO, no pass for Shawn.  I do think he and Kaitlyn are a good fit, but he is not going through anything any other contestants have not faced and handled much better than Shawn is.

Kaitlyn loves the hot headed behavior, so good for them.  I don't like that about Shawn, I personally appreciate having a husband who trusts me and whom I can trust.  JMO.

ETA a very important IMO!


Last edited by stuckinsc on Thu Jul 09, 2015 1:52 am; edited 1 time in total
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Post by albean99 Thu Jul 09, 2015 1:04 am

I just don't get the animosity for Shawn. He doesn't bother me and I don't see the violent temper, etc that others do. I certainly stuck up for Nick last season but now have more of a feel for why people are bothered by him. People have the right to dislike either guy but I just don't have the energy or inclination to feel strongly about either one, good or bad. All I care about is being entertained and hopefully a happy ending. I actually like K/S together. Now to get through the drama. :Nod:

JMHO


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