Andi Dorfman - The Bachelorette 10 - Discussion - #4

emusha wrote:Andi's subtweets about Josh and Nick are just the kind of stuff you can expect from a high schooler. Andi seems to be one of the messiest grudge holders in this franchise -- imho if you keep holding onto bitterness to make u feel like ur better than ppl there's very little growth and self-reflection happening in ur life....

I agree Andi should stay off SM and tweeting about Josh, Nick or anything TB. I just don't understand how that connects her work/travel. I think they are two different things. I know working people who are very competent who I can't stand personally. I think work/personal is very different.

But what is she actually trying to do? Is she actually working? Other than filming a web series?  

She said she likes fashion, but couldn't explain what aspect she liked most, just fashion.  That's kind of a big broad range of job opprounities there.  As far as we know, she hasn't enrolled in any classes to help learn, train or enhance her love and desire to work in the fashion.  Yes, she's designed (and I use that word very loosely) a shirt and done some modeling, too.  And she has a blog (I don't follow or read it, so I don't know if it's still being updated).  

But that limited income can't possibly go far.  I mean she somehow has to pay for her apartment, endless travels and shopping trips, and just normal day to day living and bills.  I'm all for parents being supportive and helping out if it's needed and they're in a position to.  But at some point, she needs to learn to stand on her own two feet and support herself.  

Maybe I'm too hard on her, but being around the same age and coming from the same state... I expected more of a well educated, supposedly driven, independent person who came from a privileged family.  It's not as if she doesn't have opportunities or endless support from her parents.  From what I see it's like she's waiting for some tv gig to fall into her lap to continue the fame or waiting to meet a sugar daddy who will let her flit around doing what ever she wants and spending endless amounts of money without asking questions or complaining.  If we suddenly see or hear about going back to school, working in some way, start hearing less of look at me, it's all about me, and those snide subtweets end, I'll gladly reconsider my opinion of her.  Until then, I'm thinking she and I really don't want to be a farmer, but instead famous Chris missed the boat on what could've been a wonderful fame loving relationship.

Just because I got curious and I'm obsessive:
MEandI moved to NYC 03-05-15.
03-19-15 through 03-26-15 vacay.
04-16-15 through 04-17-15 mini vacay.
05-01-15 through 05-03-15 mini vacay.
05-09-15 through 05-12-15 mini vacay.
05-23-15 through 05-27-15 mini vacay.
05-29-15 through 05-31-15 mini vacay.
06-10-15 through 06-15-15  vacay.
06-19-15 through 06-21-15 mini vacay.
So she has lived in NYC approx. 115 days.
She has been on travel duty 34 days. 
So that is about 30% of her time away from NYC and 70% time there.
*Also, while we are in one thread discussing one cast person, we are not to be comparing this cast person to another as that discussion can become divisive with the other cast person. 
Others in their discussion threads have had the same issues tossed out as to "what do they do".

well honestly the work/travel/moving is a bit besides the point imho but I tend to agree with GA that moving to NYC is inconsequential if Andi remains bitter and taking stabs at people to make herself feel superior and doesn't seem to be showing any personal growth ...so you're in a new city -- great! move on with your life focus on the stuff in NYC and stop taking stabs at people who you u want everyone to see as people who did you wrong ... why the need to act a victim if she's so busy getting life going in NYC. it just shows that she's still holding onto negative feelings and using those situations to make herself feel good about herself... Imho this is immature, petty and very lowww -- she keeps sinking down on the low road over and over in my eyes when all i want her is to take the high road ...move on...try new adventures in NYC learn something of consequence and start truly self-reflecting, owning her actions and mistakes, putting on her big girl pants and getting her hands dirty trying stuff that may be hard and challenging but that will help her grow... growth takes vulnerability. I see veryyyyy little of that from andi ever...she's always putting on an image of perfection.... so for her own sake i hope her public persona is wrong and she's very much asking herself the tough questions, getting vulnerable with herself, owning her actions, taking risks that take her out of her comfort zone etc.

Ladybug82 wrote:But what is she actually trying to do? Is she actually working? Other than filming a web series?  

She said she likes fashion, but couldn't explain what aspect she liked most, just fashion.  That's kind of a big broad range of job opprounities there.  As far as we know, she hasn't enrolled in any classes to help learn, train or enhance her love and desire to work in the fashion.  Yes, she's designed (and I use that word very loosely) a shirt and done some modeling, too.  And she has a blog (I don't follow or read it, so I don't know if it's still being updated).  

But that limited income can't possibly go far.  I mean she somehow has to pay for her apartment, endless travels and shopping trips, and just normal day to day living and bills.  I'm all for parents being supportive and helping out if it's needed and they're in a position to.  But at some point, she needs to learn to stand on her own two feet and support herself.  

Maybe I'm too hard on her, but being around the same age and coming from the same state... I expected more of a well educated, supposedly driven, independent person who came from a privileged family.  It's not as if she doesn't have opportunities or endless support from her parents.  From what I see it's like she's waiting for some tv gig to fall into her lap to continue the fame or waiting to meet a sugar daddy who will let her flit around doing what ever she wants and spending endless amounts of money without asking questions or complaining.  If we suddenly see or hear about going back to school, working in some way, start hearing less of look at me, it's all about me, and those snide subtweets end, I'll gladly reconsider my opinion of her.  Until then, I'm thinking she and I really don't want to be a farmer, but instead famous Chris missed the boat on what could've been a wonderful fame loving relationship.

I'm a New Yorker also, obviously not the same age however What I am having a difficult time understand is that people assume they know what Andi is doing work wise based on limited information. Then I think that becomes part of who people view her as a person, without truly knowing the whole story. I don't like her SM persona but I don't know enough about her work life to judge that part. That's why I ask so often if people know actual information about her work life right now.

I personally said she is doing nothing, because if she was doing something, we'd know about it via SM. She promoted scarves, once, she promoted video's, once, she promoted her blog, once. That's her work life IMO.

I would never compare her to any other former contestant or F1. They all promote themselves, their work, their beliefs and they all walk the talk. I can't think of one former lead, or F1 that is doing nothing. They all moved on, and they realize that #TheirYearIsUp. (Thanks to a certain hashtagger.)

She takes great joy in rubbing it in. She enjoys having one up on every one at no cost to anyone's feelings.

There are a couple of former contestants/leads that I didn't care for during their season. Over time, they moved on, are successful and have proven themselves and their abilities. I give them credit and enjoy following them.

We are talking two years? What has she accomplished other than being on JPG's season, and being the lead on Bachelorette 10. These are my opinions and what I think of her. She hasn't given me a reason to like her.

For me, the simplest way I can explain my issue regarding Andi not growing/improving is this:

Whether Andi lives in Georgia, NYC, or elsewhere, her view is the same - it's the Bachelor-ette/SM view.

eliza3 wrote:What do you want her to do?  Go back to being a DA if
she hates it?  ( i Know I know she said she was going to go back to Law but can't we all change our minds?)   Stay in Atlanta when there are other opportunities elsewhere.

I am not a fan of Andi's but I don't understand why her moving and trying to try something different  is such a horrible thing.

eliza3 wrote:

Kashathediva wrote:

eliza3 wrote:

I have not been counting the days in the city versus the days out for business or vacation…can you help me there??

I don't have an exact tally. Refer to when she moved.(March 2015?)  Then follow her stream of sm. It is a conservative estimation on my part to say she as been traveling a lot. I think she has flown out of town at least 5-6 times in less than 5 months being in NYC.

This is what I find interesting.  So many people on this show have changed their professions post productions.  You don't have to have a contract any more,  People work from home (as my children do) or travel several times a month (as my husband does) to make a living.   The times are changing as are work environments.   To assume that Andi isn't working because she doesn't have a 9 - 5 contract doesn't make sense to me.

Sweet dear adored Catherine Lowe is working from home, but I don't see people talking about what a horrible person she is.  Ashley I is a blogger that works from home, but I don't hear people talking about her lack of work.   I think we have no idea what Andi is actual doing, the odd hours she may be working, etc.  

I understand that people are angry, disappointed, upset for what happened on the show, but to hate what she is doing now without truly understanding exactly what she is doing makes no sense to me  JMHO

Kashathediva wrote:Just because I got curious and I'm obsessive:
MEandI moved to NYC 03-05-15.
03-19-15 through 03-26-15 vacay.
04-16-15 through 04-17-15 mini vacay.
05-01-15 through 05-03-15 mini vacay.
05-09-15 through 05-12-15 mini vacay.
05-23-15 through 05-27-15 mini vacay.
05-29-15 through 05-31-15 mini vacay.
06-10-15 through 06-15-15  vacay.
06-19-15 through 06-21-15 mini vacay.
So she has lived in NYC approx. 115 days.
She has been on travel duty 34 days. 
So that is about 30% of her time away from NYC and 70% time there.
*Also, while we are in one thread discussing one cast person, we are not to be comparing this cast person to another as that discussion can become divisive with the other cast person. 
Others in their discussion threads have had the same issues tossed out as to "what do they do".

eliza3 wrote:

Ladybug82 wrote:But what is she actually trying to do? Is she actually working? Other than filming a web series?  

She said she likes fashion, but couldn't explain what aspect she liked most, just fashion.  That's kind of a big broad range of job opprounities there.  As far as we know, she hasn't enrolled in any classes to help learn, train or enhance her love and desire to work in the fashion.  Yes, she's designed (and I use that word very loosely) a shirt and done some modeling, too.  And she has a blog (I don't follow or read it, so I don't know if it's still being updated).  

But that limited income can't possibly go far.  I mean she somehow has to pay for her apartment, endless travels and shopping trips, and just normal day to day living and bills.  I'm all for parents being supportive and helping out if it's needed and they're in a position to.  But at some point, she needs to learn to stand on her own two feet and support herself.  

Maybe I'm too hard on her, but being around the same age and coming from the same state... I expected more of a well educated, supposedly driven, independent person who came from a privileged family.  It's not as if she doesn't have opportunities or endless support from her parents.  From what I see it's like she's waiting for some tv gig to fall into her lap to continue the fame or waiting to meet a sugar daddy who will let her flit around doing what ever she wants and spending endless amounts of money without asking questions or complaining.  If we suddenly see or hear about going back to school, working in some way, start hearing less of look at me, it's all about me, and those snide subtweets end, I'll gladly reconsider my opinion of her.  Until then, I'm thinking she and I really don't want to be a farmer, but instead famous Chris missed the boat on what could've been a wonderful fame loving relationship.

I'm a New Yorker also, obviously not the same age however   What I am having a difficult time understand is that people assume they know what Andi is doing work wise based on limited information.   Then I think that becomes part of who people view her as a person, without truly knowing the whole story.   I don't like her SM persona but I don't know enough about her work life to judge that part.   That's why I ask so often if people know actual information about her work life right now.

So many interesting posts, I wanted to get them all together. We judge Andi because she tweets and posts so much asking us to pay attention to her. Most have stopped paying attention to JPG and most of the girls from his season because they don't bother to share so much of our lives with us. Andi is a huge over-sharer. I applaud Andi for taking a chance, but she took that chance and only shows us herself shopping in the city or going out and having fun, nothing of the things she is doing to pursue a new passion. She also travels more than most people do. I have said to me she is now like a Kardashian or like Jef Holms. They exist to be on SM and famous. People keep up with them and they have the resources to do so, but it doesn't mean that I don't find them wasteful.

Andi can and should do whatever she wants, I have no idea if she is actually doing anything to pursue a new career or life passion, since her SM that she shares a lot of is about negativity towards others, or about her shopping or her apartment that seems really big for one woman in her 20s to be able to afford alone, or her travels or whatever product she is getting paid to endorse. I won't bring up names, but I have said this same thing about others who share a lot. I would like them to share more about their talents and careers too.

We can only judge someone on what they do or don't show us. By showing us only shallow, vain pursuits and showing us lots of that, Andi opens herself up this criticism. She can do two things, share less and we won't talk about her, or share somethings that show us that she really is chasing a new dream and not just living like a spoiled little rich girl in the city.

I find trust fund kids annoying, don't like the Hiltons, the Kardashians and I added Jef Holms to that group. Now Andi is one too. She can change that, but I am sorry the fault for our judgement goes on her not us. She can show us a more well rounded person, she chooses not to. Is that because she is about as deep as a baby pool or is it because she is developing something and doesn't want to share it yet? I have no idea. I can't unless she tells me. By posting what she does, she shows me that she is about as deep as the baby pool. JMO

How does she afford to live and travel like she does though? Her parents (to me) don't seem terribly wealthy. I can't imagine Andi is Jef Holm kind of rich.

^ Love that you utilized the multi-quote button!! 

eliza3 wrote:I understand that there are many many people who don't like Andi, but I have to say I think she is trying to grow and move forward.   It takes guts to move to a new city and try and start over, regardless if you "told people in the past you would do the same thing" or not.  Trying to move on, to a new place is scary.  I commend Andi for at least trying to reinvent herself.  

JMHO but there is NOTHING wrong with trying to reinvent yourself and find your passion, regardless of what you may have said, done, or tried before.  

But what is the point of moving when she is just aimlessly living in a big city?
And I dont see one single sign that she is moving on!
Yes, she has moved, but not moving on with life. What is it new about her? Where is her career heading? What new things she is learning except hanging panties in the kitchen?

All she does are surface level, to show the world she is moving on by relocating to a big city. But do we actually need to move in order to have personal growth? Not so much.

Andi is writing a book -- where based on her most recent tweets about both Nick and Josh she will continue to bash them...
the evidence -- the title of the book is "it's OK" -- a stab at JPG who she made famous for saying by ridiculing him on that... the book is supposed to be a tell all so soon after her break up with Josh which we know ended badly and she's still subtweeting about him hacking her...

imho based on that the possibility of her writing a book that has her taking ownership of her actions/mistakes + moving on + getting vulnerable + not throwing these guys under the bus is very small... with the level of bitterness coming from her -- if I were a friend or close family I would be very very worried about her upcoming book

her book project also says everything to me about where her head is at in terms of personal growth since her time on this show