Andi Dorfman - The Bachelorette 10 - Discussion - #3

I really can't imagine it's a show simply following her and her life.

bleuberry wrote:I really can't imagine it's a show simply following her and her life.

Sponsors are lining up now:  SLEEPY's, credit card companies, Ash&Dan, Dressbarn and college/career placement schools. Art imitating real life imitating art.

emusha wrote:Just to clarify for all reading the above -- All of it was discussed in light of Andi's career path because there are parallels every step of the way as discussed above ^.

Not totally. There were posts just about Ali and Roberto. Sometimes threads go off on a tangent so just wanted to nip it in the bud. There was really no need to talk about Josh or Roberto or Ali's intentions in her season.

Respectfully, I meant that everything I brought up about any other former contestant or lead on this show is to compare and explore Andi's journey in context of the precedent set by other contestants. I still maintain that Andi and Ali are currently following a similar trajectory. I have no intention to continue discussing Ali and Roberto in this thread simply for the sake of their own journeys.

In my very humble opinion, the similarities between Ali and Andi and their taking on the lead role then going on to pursuing a career which is DIFFERENT than their original ones (Ali - Facebook and Andi - Lawyer) and in that a career very much in the public eye contrary to their old careers makes them IMHO the MOST similar bachelorettes and therefore in my perspective, Ali is fair game for discussion in context of Andi's current decisions. On the flip side, I would have discussed Jillian if she was relevant or Deanna for that matter since both of them have dabbled in some public career tracks as hosts of shows etc.

If the convo goes into discussing Ashely H then her continuing on her own professional career and not pursuing a public career makes her someone with a different/ contrasting experience compared to the other bachelorettes. I would say Des is somewhere in between the two in that her career/specific skill has benefited from her exposure but she's not working as a show host. I think the only people who we can compare the bachettes to is essentially each other since they are the only ones who have gone through the same experience.

Ali and Roberto's relationship is also similar to Andi and Josh's in the sense that both of them seemed to go on a path of realizing they do not "mesh" together whether it be regarding lifestyle choices or "being different people".

If we wanted to not talk about these issues in Andi's thread then maybe the right venue would be a space for general discussion about the bachelorettes. JMHO  and thanks for letting me have a say on this part.

Every single couple that have split, did so because they realized they didn't mesh with one another. Each instance, one said what they wanted in life, and once off the show, wanted something else.

We have seen this happen in a lot of the season's, Andi is no exception.

The difference is, she was pegged while on JPG's season, that she would never return to law, she wouldn't be married any time soon because meeting some one who would put up with her will be difficult, and she's going to make sure she won't go away any time soon. The more pics that surface with her head flung back in laughter, the more annoying she gets.

In general I think this a case of misrepresentation while on the show for the sake of the show. 
She was sold to the public as a lawyer Bachelorette, Nick talked to her mom about supporting her career as a lawyer so we know she didn't tell him otherwise, and Josh likely was led to believe or assumed she would return to law in a short period of time.  It's one thing for viewers to assume her moniker of "lawyer" is accurate but quite another for her suitors to because in the process of them "seeing a future" they would be trying to envision how life would be on a daily basis: where they would live, daily routine, when they might begin a family. 
Andi having other career goals IMO would have caused a crumbling of Josh's initial vision of their future together.  His career switch has a clear trajectory so it is much easier to adapt to whereas Andi's goal of an entertainment/fashion career is a misfit for living in Atlanta, had no clear systematic steps for attainment, and because before it began it was so vague it IMO would give Josh vertigo. 

Oh well, other women have chosen careers over a relationship.  Whenever that is the case, their end game is more important than the guy when a choice needs to be made at a specific time.
She said she wants a guy to support HER goals so she needs someone who fits into HER life.

It is an important lesson for future leads to clearly represent themselves. Chris is a good example of someone who brought clarity.

Great post NR!! I completely agree on the part where you said

She said she wants a guy to support HER goals so she needs someone who fits into HER life.

I think it's very important that the lives can mesh together in a foreseeable way -- in a very practical way. What Andi can learn from previous bachettes esp those who pursued public careers and weren't fully open about that ambition (Ali is the only one I can think of right now but there might be others) is that she would do good to find a guy who wants the same lifestyle and would be 100% comfortable with adapting to where and how her career goals take her....and that his own ideas of family and life and the structure for that is not contradictory to her own (traditional vs. unconventional -- Roberto also envisioned a traditional lifestyle IMHO). I don't think this is the only reason the relationship may not have worked and I don't think Josh was opposed to the career per say more so the lifestyle and the image of a family life....and also there has to be something more within the relationship that didn't allow for  it to work beyond this...

emusha wrote:Great post NR!! I completely agree on the part where you said

She said she wants a guy to support HER goals so she needs someone who fits into HER life.

I think it's very important that the lives can mesh together in a foreseeable way -- in a very practical way. What Andi can learn from previous bachettes esp those who pursued public careers and weren't fully open about that ambition (Ali is the only one I can think of right now but there might be others) is that she would do good to find a guy who wants the same lifestyle and would be 100% comfortable with adapting to where and how her career goals take her....and that his own ideas of family and life and the structure for that is not contradictory to her own (traditional vs. unconventional -- Roberto also envisioned a traditional lifestyle IMHO). I don't think this is the only reason the relationship may not have worked and I don't think Josh was opposed to the career per say more so the lifestyle and the image of a family life....and also there has to be something more within the relationship that didn't allow for  it to work beyond this...

I think Sean followed aspirations along a moderately high profile line but Cat was able to adjust and benefit as well. Theirs was  good "mesh".  
  Traditional vs unconventional.  Excellent.

julychild wrote:If she is indeed filming a reality TV show, it would make sense that she said in the People interview that she wants a man who would want do the same career that she does. If one person wants to be on tv, and the other doesn't, it would pose a stress to any relationship.

Well Josh does want to be back on TV, he said he is interested in being the Bachelor...

luvlady345 wrote:

julychild wrote:If she is indeed filming a reality TV show, it would make sense that she said in the People interview that she wants a man who would want do the same career that she does. If one person wants to be on tv, and the other doesn't, it would pose a stress to any relationship.

Well Josh does want to be back on TV, he said he is interested in being the Bachelor...

Yes, but this was said post break up. I'm guessing that Josh had no expectation to be on TV again, especially as The Bachelor if he was getting engaged to Andi. He probably thought they would get married, have kids and live happily every after.

GuardianAngel wrote:Every single couple that have split, did so because they realized they didn't mesh with one another. Each instance, one said what they wanted in life, and once off the show, wanted something else.

We have seen this happen in a lot of the season's, Andi is no exception.

The difference is, she was pegged while on JPG's season, that she would never return to law, she wouldn't be married any time soon because meeting some one who would put up with her will be difficult, and she's going to make sure she won't go away any time soon. The more pics that surface with her head flung back in laughter, the more annoying she gets.

I had to laugh since I had the exact same thought! I can practically smell the fakeness...."I am having a great time and loving my new life. I am. I AM! Really. No, really. Look at me laugh and laugh! See?"

"And I looovve Dressbarn just like all the other suburbia matrons! So what if it's not trendy Nicole Miller!"