Episode 7 - 7/11 - Discussion - Spoilers

CarrieAlexander wrote:

Coastal wrote:

KarmaGirl wrote:This might be right - and why we don't see the passionate kisses with Ben and Ashley!

All I remember is that Ashley has stated again that the attraction is there with her and Ben, the emotional connection is there in full swing. With JP, she states that she is trying to find out what the emotional conenction is and if they have the whole package..........

I don't mean for this to come off in the wrong way at all, just curious because I can't find it anywhere right now. When did she say this? TIA!

I heard it in the last epi when she is talking about the guys. The hong kong epi is when she's talking about the emotional connection she already has with Ben......The emotional part is what she's trying to find with JP............It is also in the last epi when she states that she's trying to find the whole package.......my thoughts is that the physical part of her and Ben's relationship came through last epi and she's found the whole package with him..........IMO

To be fair...she called Ben the total package in Episode 4 and she called JP the total package in episode 6. If I recall correctly. I'm certain about when she called Ben because that is when I noticed someone besides JP. I'm fairly certain about JP in episode , but I would probably have to listen again on their date.

happyntexas wrote:To be fair...she called Ben the total package in Episode 4 and she called JP the total package in episode 6. If I recall correctly. I'm certain about when she called Ben because that is when I noticed someone besides JP. I'm fairly certain about JP in episode , but I would probably have to listen again on their date.

I am going back to watch again...........er..........tomorrow.......time for bed now though. Have a good night happyntexas.

goodnight

Thanks Coastal! JMO, I think that her telling JP about Bentley and even telling him that she wants him to know about "the whole journey" built their emotional connection back in HK. She was very open and honest with her feelings, which parallels to him being very honest with her about his struggles with the process later on. They seem to openly communicate their feelings and concerns with each other and have an understanding of where they stand.

Off to bed..too much caffeine today, my brother's already off to work this morning! Nighty night.

ETA: happyntexas -- she said Ben is the total package, but said JP is the total package for her

CarrieAlexander wrote:Thanks Coastal! JMO, I think that her telling JP about Bentley and even telling him that she wants him to know about "the whole journey" built their emotional connection back in HK. She was very open and honest with her feelings, which parallels to him being very honest with her about his struggles with the process later on. They seem to openly communicate their feelings and concerns with each other and have an understanding of where they stand.

Off to bed..too much caffeine today, my brother's already off to work this morning! Nighty night.

ETA: happyntexas -- she said Ben is the total package, but said JP is the total package for her

Night too Carrie............I am finally hitting the sack too. Thanks for a great convo, seems rare around here with some these days.

I do feel that the show is far from over though and Ben might be F1 from my sources and how I feel about the edit........

Coastal wrote:

KarmaGirl wrote:This might be right - and why we don't see the passionate kisses with Ben and Ashley!

All I remember is that Ashley has stated again that the attraction is there with her and Ben, the emotional connection is there in full swing. With JP, she states that she is trying to find out what the emotional conenction is and if they have the whole package..........

Honestly, given the body language I've seen, it's going to be the FD or LCD before we may see passion from Ben. I think Ashley sees JP as being out of her league much the way Ali tried to talk herself out of Roberto by fixating on Frank who was her 'type' like Ben and Constantine are her 'physical type'. For as understanding JP has been with her and as much as she raves about his kisses, she was still questioning his sincerity. She's scared he's going to leave whereas right off the bat she felt Ben 'liked' her (funny he's the one who now has conditions on whether he could really love her unless his family does). Ashley's fear of JP leaving her would be why she didn't choose him. Whenever you meet someone and can't understand why they are single because you think they are great, what you are really saying is that "you're so great you could have anybody. why would you want me?"

The odds of thing working out no matter who she chooses are slim. However, if she has to choose something that may not work, I'd rather her go for the passion/sex. She can marry someone 'comfortable' later ... LOL!

sjcaligurl wrote:

Coastal wrote:

KarmaGirl wrote:This might be right - and why we don't see the passionate kisses with Ben and Ashley!

All I remember is that Ashley has stated again that the attraction is there with her and Ben, the emotional connection is there in full swing. With JP, she states that she is trying to find out what the emotional conenction is and if they have the whole package..........

Honestly, given the body language I've seen, it's going to be the FD or LCD before we may see passion from Ben. I think Ashley sees JP as being out of her league much the way Ali tried to talk herself out of Roberto by fixating on Frank who was her 'type' like Ben and Constantine are her 'physical type'. For as understanding JP has been with her and as much as she raves about his kisses, she was still questioning his sincerity. She's scared he's going to leave whereas right off the bat she felt Ben 'liked' her (funny he's the one who now has conditions on whether he could really love her unless his family does). Ashley's fear of JP leaving her would be why she didn't choose him. Whenever you meet someone and can't understand why they are single because you think they are great, what you are really saying is that "you're so great you could have anybody. why would you want me?"

The odds of thing working out no matter who she chooses are slim. However, if she has to choose something that may not work, I'd rather her go for the passion/sex. She can marry someone 'comfortable' later ... LOL!

Don't you remember............Brad also raved about Chantal's kisses..........didn't go anywhere did it? Who's to say she has to go for one or the other........whynot marry for passion AND the emotional connection she craves.......with Ben, she said she has both.........kinda no brainer to me. Ben = F1 and she gets the best of both worlds.

I don't understand your comment about marrying someone "comfortable" later........I got lucky with mine the first time 24 years ago..........the emotional, the physical and a long marriage that has had both........who's to say that she doesn't have that with Ben the first time as well??

I guess it depends on which side of the fence you are as to who/what/and exactly to what extent you will see........mind you, being openminded does help to see both sides.

sjcaligurl wrote:

Coastal wrote:

KarmaGirl wrote:This might be right - and why we don't see the passionate kisses with Ben and Ashley!

All I remember is that Ashley has stated again that the attraction is there with her and Ben, the emotional connection is there in full swing. With JP, she states that she is trying to find out what the emotional conenction is and if they have the whole package..........

Honestly, given the body language I've seen, it's going to be the FD or LCD before we may see passion from Ben. I think Ashley sees JP as being out of her league much the way Ali tried to talk herself out of Roberto by fixating on Frank who was her 'type' like Ben and Constantine are her 'physical type'. For as understanding JP has been with her and as much as she raves about his kisses, she was still questioning his sincerity. She's scared he's going to leave whereas right off the bat she felt Ben 'liked' her (funny he's the one who now has conditions on whether he could really love her unless his family does). Ashley's fear of JP leaving her would be why she didn't choose him. Whenever you meet someone and can't understand why they are single because you think they are great, what you are really saying is that "you're so great you could have anybody. why would you want me?"

The odds of thing working out no matter who she chooses are slim. However, if she has to choose something that may not work, I'd rather her go for the passion/sex. She can marry someone 'comfortable' later ... LOL!

I'll give you that she probably does choose passion. But, on the other hand with Ben. I watched the video where he talks of his family to her. He also states in the next breath, that with the way he has talked about her, he sees no reason that his family would not like her.

I also don't think what he says is unreasonable. I've heard lots of bachelorette contestants say they would have to get along with family. If you stay with someone any length of time......you marry the family too.

I like both Ben and JP......and she probably will pick JP. Which is fine. But, I try, for the sake of fairness, to at least include both possibilities. Since the two will feature prominently.....I feel like they should both be given equal consideration.

sjcaligurl wrote:

Honestly, given the body language I've seen, it's going to be the FD or LCD before we may see passion from Ben. I think Ashley sees JP as being out of her league much the way Ali tried to talk herself out of Roberto by fixating on Frank who was her 'type' like Ben and Constantine are her 'physical type'. For as understanding JP has been with her and as much as she raves about his kisses, she was still questioning his sincerity. She's scared he's going to leave whereas right off the bat she felt Ben 'liked' her (funny he's the one who now has conditions on whether he could really love her unless his family does). Ashley's fear of JP leaving her would be why she didn't choose him. Whenever you meet someone and can't understand why they are single because you think they are great, what you are really saying is that "you're so great you could have anybody. why would you want me?"

The odds of thing working out no matter who she chooses are slim. However, if she has to choose something that may not work, I'd rather her go for the passion/sex. She can marry someone 'comfortable' later ... LOL!

ITA. Just like Ali, she's shocked that what she wants in a man can exist and that type of guy can actually be into her and won't leave her. It's why she asks him a million variations of "Will you leave me?" and "Do you like me?" even though she knows he likes her and wants to be with her. Luckily, I think Just Per-Fact is going to be just as sweet and reassuring as Rahbirdo and she'll eventually calm down and realize that he's sticking by her and it's okay to relax. She looks totally relaxed, happy and confident to me in all her media now so I think it's all good.

sjcaligurl wrote:

Jeepers wrote:The guys weren't giving him a hard time. They were asking Ben about his dare

Come on! They knew he was hanging by a thread before Ben even came back. Why ask those questions in front of him when they knew he was almost in tears to begin with?

what is JP?? A girl?? these are guys don't care about other guys feelings, these are the kind of BS stuff they do to each other - not that I think they asked Ben about his date just to rub it in JPs face (or maybe they did - we'll never know)

Coastal wrote:

KarmaGirl wrote:

sjcaligurl wrote:I don't have JP on a pedestal. He seems like a regular guy. Any guy who wouldn't get heated seeing me kiss or date other men is probably a pimp and he'd probably be trying to get some money from the guys. LOL!

Lucas looked like he was pretty much seething on that wedding picture date moreso than JP and all he complained about was wearing a dress. He should have told her that he didn't like seeing her kiss JP and Ames too. LOL!

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TOTALLY AGREE!

Not caring that Ashley is locking lips with the other guys means you really don't care that you get sloppy seconds, and really don't care about the girl enough to bother being jealous. Lucas said as much that he didn't care - saying they were really different and a relationship would have been an uphill battle. Rather than be upset that Ashley was kissing other men in front of him, Lucas was upset he had to wear a dress.

JP cares about Ashley. His jealousy was about real feelings of love/passion for Ashley. He didn't whine about Bentley coming back, or whine about the date's attire like Lucas did - he was upset because the woman he feels he is falling in love with was out all night with another man. That left him to wonder, "Was what we had real or not?" He is emotionally invested and is already worrying about losing Ashley. Sounds very normal to me.

I'm loving watching this amazing love story unfold. If Ashley doesn't pick JP - then Ben must really do an end-run, because I wouldn't have seen it coming!

That's the idea, you hardly ever see the F1 coming......they just are there. As far as JP being on the pedestal around here.........that's for sure. When someone mentions something against JP, that poster gets bombarded.

Like I said before, sometimes it seems like this has turned into a JP fansite board........too bad.

And sometimes it seems like this board has turned into a JP hate site, depending on which posts you read, with posters being bombarded and their opinions dismissed as just putting JP on a "pedestal" for considering anything he does in a positive light. There is plenty of speculation about JP's supposed "gloating" (no evidence) and dangerous temper (no evidence) from people who seem to have a grudge against him. (I guess that is the opposite of the pedestal). Same difference, as far as I'm concerned, and neither side is any more entitled to their opinion than the other, nor is their opinion more valid or unbiased. There is bias on both sides, although not everybody will admit to it, is all.

And again, if Ashley had already definitively admitted on camera that she "loved Ben" in such a way that it indicated any deep emotional attachment, the show would be over.