Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread #2

by mindless Fri Jan 09, 2015 2:59 pm

I think Andi wanted love and marriage as long as her life was all about work that she wasn't that keen on. She thought love would make everything perfect and in any case the lead is basically required to say they want marriage and kids more than anything. Unfortunately Josh was serious about settling down and starting a family and didn't have his sights set on the entertainment industry. I think after 8 months of living together, going to the gym and the mall, watching sports, talking sports and dietary supplements, Andi realised she wants more out of life than that. I'm sure in that time she got a sense of what a future with Josh would look like and I don't think it was what she envisioned during the show. If she was having serious doubts then I doubt she wanted to look for a house and Josh's lease being up kind of forced them to decide what to do. Of course they could've rented some place together and kept trying, but they were probably at the point where they didn't see it being worth the trouble.

It's kind of sad that there probably hasn't been a final two more in love with the lead than during Andi's season, nor a lead as lost when it comes to who she is and what she really wants.

by aviej Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:01 pm

sara11 wrote:omg she put a friday five on her blog!!!

Umm...weird...why didn't she put her relationship ended as a top 5. To me, she should have taken a break from any social media, although it be a political post. Just stop for a minute and evaluate what just happened.

by Justafan2 Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:03 pm

aviej wrote:
sara11 wrote:omg she put a friday five on her blog!!!

Umm...weird...why didn't she put her relationship ended as a top 5. To me, she should have taken a break from any social media, although it be a political post. Just stop for a minute and evaluate what just happened.

I have a feeling this is a coping mechanism for her. I really do hope her and Josh post something though. I know they are both rather private but I don't want them to act like it didn't happen.

by sara11 Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:04 pm

Justafan2 wrote:
aviej wrote:
sara11 wrote:omg she put a friday five on her blog!!!

Umm...weird...why didn't she put her relationship ended as a top 5. To me, she should have taken a break from any social media, although it be a political post. Just stop for a minute and evaluate what just happened.

I have a feeling this is a coping mechanism for her. I really do hope her and Josh post something though. I know they are both rather private but I don't want them to act like it didn't happen.

It could be, she probably wishes right now that she had work to take her mind off it.

by MiaHawk Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:14 pm

My take on the demise of their relationship was that Josh was never looking for a trophy wife and that's what Andi's real goal is. While on the show Andi presented herself as a smart, hard working, independent, attorney who was ready to settle down and be a partner in raising a family.

After the show she never utilized her intelligence in any way I saw, she took a leave of absence then quit her ADA job, lived off of Hy's money, moved into Josh's place, shopped, and traveled on somebody else's dime to do promotional engagements. She was probably hoping for DWTS or a different gig to come out of this show. She went from being taken care of by Daddy to being taken care of by Josh.

IMO, she has been groomed to be a trophy wife, and there's nothing wrong with that, except I don't think that was what Josh was ever looking for. So, IMO, it was a case of bait and switch. She mouthed the words that she knew she needed to say in order to be appear desirable, and she held out hope that Josh would fall so head over heals in love with her that he wouldn't mind being her Sugar Daddy, bread winner, and wonderful father to her children.

We all strike up deals in our relationships. Sometimes one person is the sole bread winner but the other takes on more responsibility for the home and children. Something tells me that Andi was never going to be the bread winner and she was never going to be the more domestic of the two. I think Josh realized this, and he had buyer's remorse.

Relationships are like real estate. There are properties that have wide appeal, and there are those "specialty" properties that tend to only attract a certain kind of buyer. I think Andi is a "specialty property" and she's going to have to either do some major renovations or she is going to have to wait until that special buyer comes along. He'll be somebody who is in the market for a trophy wife, and they can live happily ever after.

JMHOAA

by KB_Mom Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:21 pm

mindless wrote:I think Andi wanted love and marriage as long as her life was all about work that she wasn't that keen on. She thought love would make everything perfect and in any case the lead is basically required to say they want marriage and kids more than anything. Unfortunately Josh was serious about settling down and starting a family and didn't have his sights set on the entertainment industry. I think after 8 months of living together, going to the gym and the mall, watching sports, talking sports and dietary supplements, Andi realised she wants more out of life than that. I'm sure in that time she got a sense of what a future with Josh would look like and I don't think it was what she envisioned during the show. If she was having serious doubts then I doubt she wanted to look for a house and Josh's lease being up kind of forced them to decide what to do. Of course they could've rented some place together and kept trying, but they were probably at the point where they didn't see it being worth the trouble.

It's kind of sad that there probably hasn't been a final two more in love with the lead than during Andi's season, nor a lead as lost when it comes to who she is and what she really wants.

You make a good point about Josh's lease about to expire explaining the timing- maybe they were struggling but really trying to work it out, but the housing issue needing to be determined is what forced them to decide do we keep trying or do we call it quits

by StacyNor Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:36 pm

Love your analysis Mia. And I honestly think Josh woke up one day and asked himself the difficult questions about this relationship. Did he see a future with Andi? Does he see them having the kind of marriage his parents has? Does he love her enough for marriage? Does he see her as the mother of his children? Questions after the show that might have been easy to answer but after knowing her he discovered he might be wrong about it. They'll be fine, they need to work on themselves.

by MiaHawk Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:46 pm

StacyNor wrote:Love your analysis Mia. And I honestly think Josh woke up one day and asked himself the difficult questions about this relationship. Did he see a future with Andi? Does he see them having the kind of marriage his parents has? Does he love her enough for marriage? Does he see her as the mother of his children? Questions after the show that might have been easy to answer but after knowing her he discovered he might be wrong about it. They'll be fine, they need to work on themselves.

Or...it could be the other way around...Andi grew bored with Josh. She imagined a more glamorous, lucrative, limelighty life with him, and that didn't pan out the way she'd hoped. She looked at her friends and thought "I want what they have" or "the grass is greener over the fence" and she decided to end it with Josh. And maybe that lease coming due was the reason for the timing.

I'm not invested in any of this. I just find it interesting to observe people and speculate. I'm especially interested in seeing what Andi's next move will be. Will Hy come to her rescue? Will she be humbled? Will she develop a bit more compassion for others and lose some of her adversarial nature? question

by Justafan2 Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:50 pm

MiaHawk wrote:
StacyNor wrote:Love your analysis Mia. And I honestly think Josh woke up one day and asked himself the difficult questions about this relationship. Did he see a future with Andi? Does he see them having the kind of marriage his parents has? Does he love her enough for marriage? Does he see her as the mother of his children? Questions after the show that might have been easy to answer but after knowing her he discovered he might be wrong about it. They'll be fine, they need to work on themselves.

Or...it could be the other way around...Andi grew bored with Josh. She imagined a more glamorous, lucrative, limelighty life with him, and that didn't pan out the way she'd hoped. She looked at her friends and thought "I want what they have" or "the grass is greener over the fence" and she decided to end it with Josh. And maybe that lease coming due was the reason for the timing.

I'm not invested in any of this. I just find it interesting to observe people and speculate. I'm especially interested in seeing what Andi's next move will be. Will Hy come to her rescue? Will she be humbled? Will she develop a bit more compassion for others and lose some of her adversarial nature?

Although I am an Andi fan, I am not blinded to her faults. I think a lot of your observation is correct. I think she wanted to like the homey life Josh envisioned but she wasn't ready to give up the spotlight just yet and Josh wasn't willing to wait. I hope she is both humbled as well as open minded to some self reflection and improvement. Josh has his faults too, but I think he has always been more open to self improvement.

by KB_Mom Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:54 pm

JMHO- reminds me so much of Ali\Roberto, who I believed really did fall in love, but Roberto wanted to settle down and be out of the limelight and Ali wanted an entertainment career.

by Justafan2 Fri Jan 09, 2015 4:00 pm

KB_Mom wrote:JMHO- reminds me so much of Ali\Roberto, who I believed really did fall in love, but Roberto wanted to settle down and be out of the limelight and Ali wanted an entertainment career.

I agree. I have not seen quite as big of a push from Andi, however it does seem she is not ready to be out of the public eye. I find that a little ironic, only because she tends to have a very hard time with criticism. I don't know that she is strong enough, at least at this time, do be in a spot such as Ali.

by StacyNor Fri Jan 09, 2015 4:02 pm

MiaHawk wrote:
StacyNor wrote:Love your analysis Mia. And I honestly think Josh woke up one day and asked himself the difficult questions about this relationship. Did he see a future with Andi? Does he see them having the kind of marriage his parents has? Does he love her enough for marriage? Does he see her as the mother of his children? Questions after the show that might have been easy to answer but after knowing her he discovered he might be wrong about it. They'll be fine, they need to work on themselves.

Or...it could be the other way around...Andi grew bored with Josh. She imagined a more glamorous, lucrative, limelighty life with him, and that didn't pan out the way she'd hoped. She looked at her friends and thought "I want what they have" or "the grass is greener over the fence" and she decided to end it with Josh. And maybe that lease coming due was the reason for the timing.

I'm not invested in any of this. I just find it interesting to observe people and speculate. I'm especially interested in seeing what Andi's next move will be. Will Hy come to her rescue? Will she be humbled? Will she develop a bit more compassion for others and lose some of her adversarial nature?

You think she did the breaking up? The reason I doubt she did she was trying too hard to act like everything was OK at the red carpet and Josh looked like he had enough. Also Andi knew the public was mostly gonna blame her for the relationship ending. She already has a bad rep. Some people only liked her because of her relationship and she seem to want the fame and be the peoples pleaser. I say that because after Nick spoke to E and Ali defending him she called Ali and tried making Nick look like the bad guy. I just have my doubts she broke it off, she had too much to lose.

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