Doug Hehner & Jamie Hehner - MAFS - Season 1 - Discussion

I just watched now ... gorgeous couple and gorgeous wedding!

Amberish wrote:I just watched now ... gorgeous couple and gorgeous wedding!

Loved the wedding....very special vows especially Doug's. Jamie has a lot to be angry about but she needs to get a good therapist to work through some of this. She wanted her mom to be there desperately and then her mom couldn't say anything right. She has so much unresolved anger, hurt and sadness that she really needs to work through before she brings all of this into her marriage and starts to have kids. She has had to be the adult taking care of everyone else when she needed someone to take care of her. She can't undo the past but she can come to terms with it. She is sooooo lucky to have someone like Doug that loves her so much and will be someone she can lean on. JMO. So happy that they found each other.

I thought she worked on that a bit during the show. Although not showing working with a professional, a couple of astute comments coming from Jamie and her mom during that segment implied such, to me, anyway.

I just finished watching. That was so special. Doug is a kind patience loving guy. Jamie is so very lucky she has a husband who is perfect for her. Her mother ironically said it best, he is her strength when she needs it and vice versa.

I'm not sure what Jamie wants from her mother, as it seems like she said, she is stuck on what happened many years ago. Jamie has had a tough life, at the same time her mother said if she does call her she doesn't want to get into what happened in the past. I can see her mother avoiding her for that reason if Jamie keeps bringing it up.

I hope it's the beginning of moving forward for both of them. Life's too short to waste so many years holding a grudge. Jamie needs to realize she may not be who she is today if she didn't go through those tough times. She has a lot to be grateful for and she should be very proud of her accomplishments. She has done very well for herself, and now she has a great husband and inlaws who are so supportive.

I was expecting some sort of cheesy renewal epi, but this was very well done.

I just watched and they are perfect! So darn sweet, I cried too. Doug reminds me of JP Rosenbaum. Handsome, funny, and sweet.

Jamie has come such a long way from what I remember from The Bachelor. I didn't watch the season but I'm glad I watched their renewal. I also loved how they poked fun at the weirdness of the first wedding

I love how he included Lady in his vows.

GuardianAngel wrote:I just finished watching. That was so special. Doug is a kind patience loving guy. Jamie is so very lucky she has a husband who is perfect for her. Her mother ironically said it best, he is her strength when she needs it and vice versa.

I'm not sure what Jamie wants from her mother, as it seems like she said, she is stuck on what happened many years ago. Jamie has had a tough life, at the same time her mother said if she does call her she doesn't want to get into what happened in the past. I can see her mother avoiding her for that reason if Jamie keeps bringing it up.

I hope it's the beginning of moving forward for both of them. Life's too short to waste so many years holding a grudge. Jamie needs to realize she may not be who she is today if she didn't go through those tough times. She has a lot to be grateful for and she should be very proud of her accomplishments. She has done very well for herself, and now she has a great husband and inlaws who are so supportive.

I was expecting some sort of cheesy renewal epi, but this was very well done.

It's not always that easy, moving on I mean. I had a difficult relationship with my mom and can completely understand why Jamie is sensitive. You can move on but then something drops you back into the past. I ignored it and moved on but never forgot and we weren't close. Sometimes it is what it is.

IA bean, and sometimes you need to leave it behind. I have done just that with a sister. Once a decision is made not to worry or care, it's done. She's not going to change because she doesn't want to, and I got tired of trying.

This is what I didn't understand with her. She made a big deal about not seeing her mother for TG and Xmas, and she wanted her at the wedding. Then at the wedding she rehashed everything from the past. We don't know if the mother is in a better place now or not but she can't continue to live her life, rehashing the past. Accept her for what she is, and if she's not the mother she wants her to be, she can't live regretting it. IMO she still has a lot of anger that's not resolved within herself.

GuardianAngel wrote:IA bean, and sometimes you need to leave it behind. I have done just that with a sister. Once a decision is made not to worry or care, it's done. She's not going to change because she doesn't want to, and I got tired of trying.

This is what I didn't understand with her. She made a big deal about not seeing her mother for TG and Xmas, and she wanted her at the wedding. Then at the wedding she rehashed everything from the past. We don't know if the mother is in a better place now or not but she can't continue to live her life, rehashing the past. Accept her for what she is, and if she's not the mother she wants her to be, she can't live regretting it. IMO she still has a lot of anger that's not resolved within herself.

I am on the fence on this part. Part of me thinks this is the real truth. The other part of me thinks that it makes for good tv, so they exploit it.
I do think she has some justifiable trust problems with her mom but I find it hard to fathom that she would allow it to mar this vow renewal, knowing how badly she felt about the 1st ceremony, she wanted it all perfect.

Loved the wedding special too. It's obvious Doug just adores Jamie. He completely loves and accepts her as she is and doesn't judge or try to change her. She loves him just as much because he is just the kind of husband she needs.

As for Jamie's issue with her Mom, if it were me, it would be hard for me to forgive because it seems her Mom has never fully acknowledged that Jamie had to take custody of her two younger siblings. Jamie was in college at the time, so really just a kid herself. At the dinner before the wedding, Jamie's sister Amy made a reference to when they were living with Jamie (I can't remember the exact quote), so I don't think it is something that Jamie is exaggerating at all. Amy also said that Jamie is the reason she graduated from high school, which makes me believe Jamie took her responsibilities for her sisters very seriously.

Yet when Jamie and her Mom were arguing and Jamie said she had to take custody of the girls because her Mom wasn't there her Mom said, "No you didn't". That would really tick me off. I feel like Jamie's Mom needs to acknowledge what Jamie did, and thank her for taking responsibility for her sisters when she wasn't able to. If it were me, I would need that before being able to move on.

GuardianAngel wrote:

Jamie N. Otis@jamienotis  ·  8m 8 minutes ago
So happy & proud & committed! I'm a Hehner! And, our Wedding Specials tonight @ 10:15! @FYI #MarriedAtFirstSight

I think the title of this thread should be renamed Jamie & Doug Hehner!!!!

I think you're right mirzam!